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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Ungrateful, spoilt, presumptious, self-entitled......

87 replies

bjf1 · 20/03/2012 20:17

and I'm not talking about a bratty teenager, either. This is a 46 year old -adult-.
Dh's birthday next week and I asked him what he would like from me and the DCs. He informed me that he had his eye on a specific item and had "bookmarked it for me on my laptop"
I was a bit surprised to say the least because it was quite pricey (£125.00), slightly more than I had in mind, and I felt a bit Shock that he had actually bookmarked it. This slapped, I felt, of greed. I mean, it's not like a milestone birthday, not like a 50th for example. And, in the present financial climate, especially mine, a bit much.

Anyway, I mulled it over for a few days, then thought OK, anticipating his delight when he unwrapped it on the day.
It was delivered today (quite large) and he was home when it arrived so I couldn't hide it from him.
So, I took it out of the box and stood back, waiting for him to thank me for my generosity. He opened his mouth and......
1st, it wasn't the exact same colour as in the picture.
2nd, it wasnt as good quality as he was expecting.
3rd, he didn't think it was going to be big enough.
"It'll do", were his exact words.
I feel gutted, and cannot believe how I have managed to bag myself someone who is so bloody ungrateful, insensitive, self-entitled.
I am not even going to ask if IABU to let this bother me, just need to rant.
Oh, and when I asked him to jokingly guess what was in the box, he said he knew what it was, because that is what he had told me he wanted. Just bloody assumed I would get it. Did'nt even have the bloody decency to pretend suprise, or say thankyou.
Wish I'd just got him a cheap box of chocs now!
TWATAngry

OP posts:
trixie123 · 20/03/2012 20:47

well the fact that it was a golf bag should have been your first clue that he's a twat Grin. If he bookmarked it, how can he have the hump about it?

Original poster
bjf1 · 20/03/2012 20:48

The best part about it is, when his birthday arrives, he will, in his superior entitled belief, will actually expect MORE presents.
GRRRRR.....
would love to tell him what a twat I think he is over this, but it would not even enter his head that he is acting like a spoilt child.

OP posts:
Original poster
bjf1 · 20/03/2012 20:52

trixie123, the one he bookmarked is no longer available to buy. In his haste to get me to part with a shitload of money, he obviously missed this point. So I ordered this years new, improved, more expensive model.
I knew I should have stuck with the old 2nd hand one on ebayGrin

OP posts:
ImperialBlether · 20/03/2012 20:57

Don't you share your money, OP? Is this coming from your own personal funds? If so, what does he get you?

Plaguegroup · 20/03/2012 20:58

Somehow it makes it just a little bit worse that it's a golf bag.

I would send it back and give him a bag from poundland, 'it'd do' surely?

Original poster
bjf1 · 20/03/2012 21:15

Plaguegroup Grin
Yes I did buy this from my personal money. I f*ing hate March:
Mum's BD, DC2 B, DC1 BD, DH BD, SIL BD, BIL BD.
I prefer December.....cheaper.

OP posts:
FirstLastEverything · 20/03/2012 21:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ImperialBlether · 20/03/2012 21:35

Can I ask you, given his general twattishness, does he personally have a lot more money than you do, to spend on things like this? Would it have broken his bank to buy it for himself?

Ouch, I don't envy you all those birthdays. Time to let some go, I think.

Original poster
bjf1 · 20/03/2012 21:35

I did say to him that I could have got him one off ebay. He looked like he had just swallowed a cup of cold sick.....he detests 2nd hand stuff. I, on the other hand, love jumble sales. Whenever I return from yet another bargain hunt at a jumble sale, he stands well back until I've scrubbed myself clean in the shower.
I keep going to them cos I know he hates it.

OP posts:
Original poster
bjf1 · 20/03/2012 21:39

I wouldn't say he has a LOT of money to throw around, but he does have expensive tastes. For example, our radio packed up working and he was desperate to listen to the footie on the local station. So, me, I would have just gone out and got the basic bog standard radio (cheapest) I could find. He, on the other hand, got in the car, and came back 10 mins later with a £50 radio. I was gobsmacked.
But he does that a lot if it's something HE really wants.

OP posts:
Original poster
bjf1 · 20/03/2012 21:41

Nice to know we are all in agrrement that my DH is a TWATGrin

OP posts:
OrmIrian · 20/03/2012 21:43

Send it back. Pocket the money and buy his a bar of chocolate instead.

Whatmeworry · 20/03/2012 21:46

I think I would leave any man who played golf on principle.

TerrierMalpropre · 20/03/2012 21:47

Total Twat. DOGHOUSE.

CurrySpice · 20/03/2012 21:48

I beleive it is commonly known on the golf course that the flashiness of the kit is in inverse proportion to the talent of the golfer so he should've got an ebay one then everyone would think he's Nick Fucking Faldo

MissFaversham · 20/03/2012 21:55

Angry for you OP. What a pig Shock Send item back due to it not being "exactly" what he wanted. Then due to his birthday being over now give him jack shit.

Whatmeworry · 20/03/2012 21:57

I beleive it is commonly known on the golf course that the flashiness of the kit is in inverse proportion to the talent of the golfer

True for any sport at amateur level I think :)

Chilenachica · 20/03/2012 22:05

Next year do what I've done in the past. Thought about going out to get a gift, decided not to bother and then said-I didn't get you anythingGrin

Original poster
bjf1 · 20/03/2012 22:11

What really gets me is that DS1 desperately wanted a PS3 for his BD. I explained that it was far too expensive and, on his BD, looked genuinely happy with the presents he did get. He could have thrown a tantrum, but he didn't.
He behaved far more mature than his own dad.
From now on DH will get gift vouchers.....he hates them with a passion as his sister always buys them for him, and he moans about it, so that is what he will be getting in futureGrin

OP posts:
bringbacksideburns · 20/03/2012 22:33

Pack it all up and send it back!!

doctordwt · 20/03/2012 23:13

Do you know, all joking aside, after all that you have said about him...

SEND IT BACK

Seriously.

Do him a big, big favour and teach him a lesson in gratitude and well, not being a tosser. Because if you don't, you are simply helping this selfish, silly, immature little grabber become less and less likeable.

thederkinsdame · 20/03/2012 23:26

Put him in the bag, zip it up, send it back. A day being thrown about in a delivery vanigbt sort him out Grin

MyLittleMiracle · 20/03/2012 23:34

I love that one thederkinsdame, just what i had in mind for him, or even better in a 2nd hand one! And leave him to get back, or take him to play golf far far away and leave him there stranded (preferably take all his money and credit cards off him!

Not than i am in the slightest vindictive, oh okay, maybe a little, of necessary!

But he is a twattosser though!

MyLittleMiracle · 20/03/2012 23:35

I just came up with a new word didnt I? I trademark it. Twattosser! registered to mlm

DodieSmith · 20/03/2012 23:42

Why are you not sending it back?