to think too many people on here are too obsessed with other peoples' money?

[wannaBe]

it's getting rather tedious..

too many threads complaining about what other people earn/spend/opinionating on if you can afford x and y then you must be rich, and if you can't then you're not, and on and on and on.

Really, who cares?

Why does it bother people so much how much other people have?

If you're happy, what does it matter? If you're not, and don't have enough money, being bitter about other people isn't going to change that.

Can't we just move on from obsessing about other peoples' money?

typo - I meant that they know what I earn.

Not what I have noticed molly. Just the general level of expectations is much higher now - used to be nothing unusual to use a launderette, now hard to find one in many places, (my friend grew up with no fridge- not that unusual in the 60s), central heating, multiple tellies, students expect to have their own laptop in their room.

By the way you could very well be struggling with a half a mil house etc...if you have overstretched yourself and your income was double that when you took out the mortgage and bought a car and had the kitchen done and put the kids in private school...I am not quite in that position but it is very hard to reverse decisions you made earlier when things were better and there have been a lot of redundancies, as well as marriage breakdowns, etc.

Everything is relative, isn't it? If we had known my husband would lose his job in June we would not have booked (in April) such an expensive summer holiday last year, for example. We could have cancelled it, but then we didn't think he would still be out of work 9 months later...this is just an example of the kind of things people might be worried about and might seem unjustified to people really on the poverty line, but are just as valid in relative terms.

Suppose it depends on the are lieins hardly any of the people I know of all ages have central heating. I think central heating is pretty rare in the under 160k market here.

I remember when we married we had one of those portable tellys with 2 directors chairs my dad got from wilkos for 2.50 each and we sat on them for 6 months with nothing else in the room and we used to think it was funny.

Also there are laundrettes all over my town and a lot of people I know push all theres up the laundrette in bin bags on their buggies.

LieIns - Of course those worries are just as valid. Although there are occasionally a few posts that are envious though, I think most of the negative posts occur when someone, of whatever income, seems to have no understanding of others with very different incomes.

And this can be posters referring to earning very little when they are in actual fact earning 4 or 5 times the average national wage. And equally people who are on low wages who are insistent that something that is in reality a luxurym si an essential and it is awful they can't afford it. It is the lack of perspective that tends to annoy posters.

yanbu it is on the increase and super nosey!

Not at all, it's human nature for the "have nots" to be jealous of the "haves". A serious redistribution of wealth is urgently due before it's too late.

It always looks absurd when someone tries to look clever by using the "after s" apostrophe and does so wrongly! It should be "people's".

I think its interesting better than talking about breastfeeding and fighting with fathers for justice!

shows 'most' people now have central heating

Not where I live not writing it here but we are in top 5% most deprived areas because of central heating but tbh you dont even need it so its a bit silly really. You dont need it I am the only one in my block that has it as the man before me had it put in but I have hardly ever used it as there isnt any need really. Most houses you see to buy near me dont have it but again it is not really a necessity

too many threads complaining about what other people earn/spend/opinionating on if you can afford x and y then you must be rich, and if you can't then you're not, and on and on and on.

If its boasting or envy its tedious, if its about taxation policy of assets vs income it is more interesting

I have no idea what my sister earns. I am sure she would tell me if I asked her, but it has never occurred to me to do so.

Sorry meant to say we dont need it as its too warm and the stats you have sent back up that for my area.

How can central heating not be a necessity

Where do you live?

Im not saying exactly but Devon just have a little heater when its cold but most of my parents and friends parents dont have it in houses either. I didnt have it when I was younger growing up or living in my first flat with my friend, and then the two properties with DH. This one is the first one that has it but we hardly ever turn it on.

YANBU. Not because I think there is something wrong in being interested in how other people live, which is largely determind by money, but in the attitudes it creates in people when they find out.

There are too many people on here that think their way of living is the only way, and that anyone with more money than they have is somehow morally bankrupt.

There is a lot of jealousy, misunderstanding, and double standards displayed on this site when it comes to money.

YA sort of BU.

I agree wholeheartedly with you about the griping side of things - I hate competitive misery. The solution to being in shit is not to drag everyone else in with you but to get out of the shit.

However, I think most people are actually less well off than they care to admit and the more people are honest about this the better. There is as much stealth boasting (albeit with a sense of apology) on here as there is competitive misery. It would help debunk the myth that everyone is earning lots more than you are and so remove the feelings of defensiveness that seem to encourage competitive misery in the first place.

Perhaps we should have a fluffy alternative to AIBU where we can encourage solidarity. We could call it YAWMDY ['yorm-dee' ?] (you agree with me don't you).

molly that's a perfect example of different people's perceptions! If you look at the map there are plenty of really cold places which have 'high' levels of no central heating (N Wales and NW Scotland, and Yorkshire for example) but it has been gradually getting more and more taken for granted.

So levels of poverty/affluence in an area as well as how somebody grew up will all have an effect on how somebody views wealth/poverty. You don't know many people who have central heating and think of it as a luxury, so that is not a valid measure of wealth to you. To others it would be seen as a basic requirement (nowadays) and they could not imagine life without it! The same could be said of other indicators like foreign travel, (lots of expensive) shoes/clothes, cars etc.

YANBU and YABU

YANBU - its a pity we cannot just talk about it calmly.
YABU - i have learnt a lot in the process. i never really understood my own motivations & now i do.

OutragedAtThePriceOfFreddos - Poundland: 6 for a £1. Live frugally, eat Freddos!

love that idea sunshine also maybe Anyone Want A Bunfight About...(AWABA)?

It bores me to tears I really dont give a shit who has what money people are obsessed to the point of hysteria , what do you earn do you earn more than me bet im richer than you

I find knowing what people earn boring. I find people's perceptions of what is rich or poor, luxury or necessity, fascinating.

yes perceptions are absolutely facinating and so varied.

I think these threads make me happy with what I have as last year I was on an expensive mortgage rate and it used to bother me as we had so little that has eased off loads now, and then I read about people on 10 x + the income moaning that it isnt enough and that is without losing their jobs or redundancies they just see it as not enough.

I realise that its hard for some people to be content and regardless of what they have it is never 'enough'. My mum used to tell me that and I used to shrug it off but shes right. However still find the subject interesting as these threads are often like some outrageous reality telly show.

Sorry, I misunderstood - if you mean Devon in this country (UK) I'm really surprised you think it's warm enough to have no central heating.

Personally I think central heating is a necessity and a definite indicator of poverty if people don't have it.