Fil ranting and raving at MY house on Mothers day

[pumpkinsweetie]

Father in law has came to my house to collect my H to take him to see his mum(they live far).
He came through my door and started ranting and raving about how he dont treat his mum right (confused)! And how he has lost 4 grandkids and he doesnt care ?? And all this was because he thought my H didnt have a present to take to his mum! She swore and shouted infront of all my kids and slammed my front door and drove off!!
Of course my H treats his mum right-he has decorated her house from top to bottom over a 2 year period, lets her in our house even after divulging to my eldest daughter my H aint her blood father (none of her beeswax)!!
Am i right in thinking its time to cut my losses with my inlaws as they cause so much trouble in mine & Hs life?

but I thought your MIL came round every thursday?

since when were flowers and chocolates not a perfectly reasonable Mother's day gift??

I do have older relations (not MIL/FIL) who behave like this..... we strongly suspect a bit of old age depression/dementia creeping in (some people have just said it's them being cantankerous) as they do have some symptoms that fit the diagnoses, but they remain functional - if unpleasant - the rest of the time, so they can't be made to go to the doctor for assessment or treatment. Only way around it each time clever planning and conniving to make sure that parties or significant events didn't get ruined, and tactful but devious use of excuses! In your instance, it might be something like how to avoid letting FIL turn up on Mothering Sunday by going over on Saturday instead, and saying you'll be out Sunday. It can feel a bit like brokering Middle East peace deals sometimes, if one is trying to avoid a major feud (eg "we are not speaking to them ever again" sort of feud). Might be difficult to cut all ties with them altogether, but maybe just try to plan it such that you see very little of them unless it's in big gatherings where they have to behave!
Sorry to hear your Mothers Day got ruined, OP - hope it's a lot better next year.

She does come every thursday but why should being far away when got car affect that? She is 2hours away but wht has that got to do with fil being a twat? Read the thread again what part do u thinks acceptable? & i like flowers & chocs perfect present for most peeps obviously not mil

My fil was not angry at picking H up he was angry because he thought we had not bought her nothing ( we had) but fil decided not to listen to us and thats wen the ranting started and i ended it with him bring told to get out of my house unsurprising considering the way he was being!!! The pil seem to b getting at my H alot recently and put a lot of pressure on him and i feel for him deeply. He was v upset today and even cried (my H does not cry) because he feels saddened at their treatment of him and the children

That is a good point, kipper. I would say that FIL was likely to be unsafe to be on the roads after his hysterical outburst. I bloody well wouldn't want to be on them with my children if I knew that a seething maniac was driving alongside me.

It could well be dementia / depression and if you were to call the police and let them know of your concerns then you would be doing everyone a favour.

Seething maniac yes thats exactly what he is & the mil is sticking up for him and saying he'l apologise FRIDAY with a chinese at ours-i dont think so i dont want them in my house ever again especially him.