Fil ranting and raving at MY house on Mothers day

[pumpkinsweetie]

Father in law has came to my house to collect my H to take him to see his mum(they live far).
He came through my door and started ranting and raving about how he dont treat his mum right (confused)! And how he has lost 4 grandkids and he doesnt care ?? And all this was because he thought my H didnt have a present to take to his mum! She swore and shouted infront of all my kids and slammed my front door and drove off!!
Of course my H treats his mum right-he has decorated her house from top to bottom over a 2 year period, lets her in our house even after divulging to my eldest daughter my H aint her blood father (none of her beeswax)!!
Am i right in thinking its time to cut my losses with my inlaws as they cause so much trouble in mine & Hs life?

I plan to ditch them completely and if H wants to see them thats fine but at his parents house only and the children wont be goin as theyv already heard that fil doesnt care about losing them

You don't own a car is no excuse to not send a card or present whatsoever. No wonder your in laws treat you like baby's if that's what you act like.

How does H do all these jobs if he is so unable to get to his parents house? Do they collect him and drop him home so he can do their jobs?

Whale, but the DH had an arrangement with OP's FIL to visit and give his Mum a present and card

In-laws are not treating them like baby's (sic); they seem to be acting like utter cunts.

Your FIL was probably a bit fed up that he had to drive the long distance to you to pick your dh up and then all the way back again. Having said that he does sound pretty volatile and not someone you would want to be around, so YANBU.

Maybe they do, Whale. It would be the least I could do to collect and drop-off someone who was going to redecorate my house gratis, in fact I would feel obliged to.

Yes they collect him and drop him. He has painted every single room of their house, put new flooring down, fitted their kitchen, fitted their oven, done their light fittings, helped them move , make a shed, knock down a tree etc etc. a lift is not too much too ask for 2yrs hard labour whilst also working 5 days at work also. The FACT is no-one talks about our children like that

He would of posted pressie but his dad wanted to take him to c her

I don't get your point creepy. A grown up making such little effort to get a present/card to a parent although shouldn't cause an outburst to that extent is hardly going to make your parents feel like you care about them is it?

He does the jobs because his dad is a lazy cunt and does nothing around the house for his wife- if he doesnt agree to going they hassle him with messages phone calls and phonecalls from sil

He BOUGHT her a present and a card if u read thread from the beginning u will find that he wouldnt let us get a word in edge ways and even if not u dnt go round sons house swearing about it, shouting scaring my kids then saying u want nothing more to do with them all because of a present. Come on be serious if mil forgot my birthday or bought my present late theres no way i would behave like that but the point is my H didnt forget

Little effort- trapsing shops all day for an expensive item and card!

So whale treating US like baby's means also talking to my kids like it too cannot believe what im reading! The amount of stuff he's done on that house would have cost them a bomb from anyone else

No you don't act like that. But when you are a grown up you take responsibility for things such as getting presents/cards to the recipient regardless of whether you have a car or not. Could dh/all of you not took a train/bus journey to see his mother or sent a present in the post? Sounds so juvenile

With all due respect, Whale, I can't see your point or understand your syntax. The present was going to be taken round there! My MIL had hers a day before because there is no Sunday post and she lives 150 miles away. MY Mum, who lives locally, had hers today - when I visited. As arranged.

Don't think I've condoned speaking to/about your kids in that way at all have I? All of you just sound very childish and uncouth

It was fil idea to pick him up and also if he tried to get there by train he wouldnt have been able to assist the children in making me my brekkie in bed or anything else planned with them , it was my mothersday too remember. If he had kept his mouth zipped and took him me & mil would have been happy but by behaving like that he has ruined mine and her mothersday

Have you posted about FIL before???

And for your information im very much grown up indeed, atleast i dont go telling my son he has a 'jellybelly' even though mil size of house(mil quote) i dont tell my unrelated grandchild shes not my sons even though he's bringing her up (none oh her business!) and i also do not expect all my house to be made up for FREE i pay for my house to be fixed! And just to clarify i would also not give up my kids for a PRESENT. Dont the pil sound grown up i think not

Yes i have posted b4 as they are awful

FIL sounds juvenile, childish and uncouth. I would probably find such behaviour easier to accept from someone who had been drinking all day than someone stone-cold sober (you would hope!) does he speak to everyone else in his life like that? His boss? Clients? Bank manager?

Doubt it. Poor MIL having to live with such a twat.

Sorry you had such an awful MD, OP.

Thanku creepy someone who understands where im coming from . They wouldnt speak to their daughter like that they look after all her kids every weekend yet never have mine (i wont let her as id b too worried) yet my H apparently dont treat her right wen my sil makes their disabled mother look after her kids when she clearly cannot cope, (v bad hip problem) can hardly walk

However much i feel for my mil she has caused a fair share of problems too

They wouldnt speak to their daughter like that they look after all her kids every weekend yet never have mine

but they live "miles" away.. so how would that be possible anyway?

just roughly, how far away is it? It cant be that far if they are constantly picking up their son to take him there..

Very far cannot tell on here but his sister lives near us to but she has a car. Shes nice enough but neither she or her H work yet they arent called up to do all this house nonsense so lets just say the pil take, take, take but very rarely help us out unless of course it involves another lift (includes odd jobs wen there)