I would not put my gran in a care home - she has 4 children and 8 grandchildren
Neither my mother, my grandfather nor I wanted to put my grandmother into a care home - actually it was a geriatric mental health unit for those with advanced alzheimers.
My mother and grandfather cared for her for 8 years at home, with some day time respite care and shortly before they could no longer help with two weeks in every five of 24 hour respite care.
When she went into full time care she did not know who we were, she could not make a cup of tea or dress herself. She was often hysterical and the police brought her home in the midddle of the night twice in her nightie. At that time my grandfather was in his early eighties and it was making his health deteriorate as well as my mothers.
In the home she was visited daily by either my mother or grandfather, my mother maintained her clothes and ensured a hairdresser visited. The standards of care were incredibly. My grandmother spent her last five years in that home. She had no underlying medical conditions apart from a stricture of the oesophagus and latterly suffered from tia's. That gave the Alzheimers the opportunity to wreak its worst with her mind and body.
At the end of the last year - she was bedridden - she had a special moving bed to ensure no bed sores develeped, she knew no-one, had forgotten how to speak and eat and drink and when she died she was 4 stone.
OP - get yourself back on here and repeat that you would never put your gran in a care home to me and all other members of my family. When you have experienced that level of tragedy, that level of destruction to a mind and body that was once fit and healthy and clever and charming and entertaining, then you can make some declarations.
I don't use this often but 