to not want to hold their babies

[Debsbear]

I have five kids of my own and I love them all dearly. When they were small I would sit and nurse them all day long (given the opportunity) and watch every expression flicker across their faces. I woud sit by their bedside when they were sleeping just amazed at how beautiful they were. Now, I feel like I've been typecast as a "babylover" and whenever anyone has a baby I hear the dreaded " Oh Deb will nurse him for you, she LOVES babies". I'm sorry, but I don't actually LOVE babies, I love MY babies and to me there is a huge difference. I am more than happy to help out in any way I can, I will babysit quite competently and will hold a baby so Mummy can go and change toddlers nappy or whatever job is calling, but please don't run away with the idea that I can think of no more pleasurable way of spending my afternoon than cuddling your baby just because he's there.

I'm glad someone mentioned smell - some babies smell adorable. Lots don't. Lots smell of pork chops and stale biscuits and, well, not clean. I don't mean shitty nappies - that's a normal baby smell.

Pork choppy, biscuitty, cigaretty smells are guaran- damn- teed to stop me wanting to 'have a hold' and my Mum cooing 'Oh Von look, s/he likes yoouu! S/he suits you, don't you feel a tiny bit broody for another..' No. Fuck off. I don't.

I can't believe people don't pick up on the milk cues, nickel: that is worrying ignorance in someone holding a baby!

oh, they pick up on it!
but they go on about "ooh, you won't find anything there!"

"but she will find some here! bloody hand her back!" (in my head)

Because I've never wanted to hold people's babies I never "offer" DD around as I don't want people to feel on the spot like I used too.

But this seems to have led to an issue amongst my family as my DM made a comment about me holding her all the time the other day and FIL says she is a "mummy's girl" (she is 7 months) as she cries every time he goes near her obviously a good judge of character

I don't like children, I just like my own!!!

YANBU That must be so annoying. I meet up with a girl every so often for a chat and our kids play. She has a 6 month old and every time she calls ands like 'do you wanna hold him??' with a smile as if she is doing me a favour..Eh no I dont want to hold him. I meet with her for a bit of adult chat and a break as the kids go off playing with her kids not to hold another child!

I am terrified of holding other people's babies as i have epilepsy and am scared that if i had a seizure then i would drop them. it only happened once with my son and i was sat down luckily. if i hurt someone else's baby i would never forgive myself.