to give my toddler cake, chocolate sweets etc

[dappply]

My husband has just said he thinks i give my toddler too much sugary stuff and that he's not sure he should get it at all. I want to double check myself to make sure he hasn't got a point.

DS is nearly three. His diet i think is really good, for instance yesterday he had

breakfast - branflakes with raisins and sunflower seeds, natrual yoghurt and chopped up pear and blueberries. Diluted orange juice and water.

mid morning - couple of oat cakes, grapes and strawberries.

lunch - bowl of homemade lentil and veg soup, grated carrot, courgette, cheese on a piece of wholemeal toast.

dinner - courgette, pepper, onion and mushroom omlette with cheese and bread and butter. raspberries and natural yoghurt.

and that's pretty normal really.

this week treat wise he had a chuppa chup lolly last sunday, a quarter of a twix on wednesday, a chocolate biscuit at playgroup of friday and a quarter of a cupcake and a chuppa chup today. DH thinks this is too much sweet stuff in a week.

My attitude was that i didn't want to refuse him sweet stuff as a rule, so as not to make it forbidden fruit, just to make sure when he does have it that it's not much, and that it's after meals. and to make sure he's not getting loads of hidden sugar in his diet, like in cereal and stuff, and to homemake the vast majority of things.

Am i being unreasonable? i can't find any guidelines anywhere

My comment is in relation to teeth.

Yeah that's why DS has branflakes. He just demands to have mine! So I get him him own bowl.

He seems to be eating well-people are generally complaining that their DC won't eat or will only eat a very narrow range. I should just relax-food is supposed to be enjoyable and sociable-not just a fuel!

Me again..I had to do a food diary for a week for the HV when DD wasn't putting on weight. She was having brown pasta, bread, rice and the HV didn't say that it was too much fibre. She used to suffer from constipation, so that's why I gave it to her. She was around 18 months at the time. I've dropped the brown rice (takes too long to cook) and the pasta now and give her brown bread for the same reasons as dapply.

Sugar is just food. It's not the work of the devil, as some people like to think.

Well I think he has a fantastic diet and would say you are definately on the right track...

Not sure about all bran but brown bread, rice and pasta all the way. Refined flours are junk food.

I'd wondered about whether it was a bit excessive on the fibre as I vaguely recollect some media hype about "middle-class malnutrition". But then I spotted the cheese, so it isn't a low fat diet anyway. The scare about middle-class malnutrition related to giving toddlers low-fat, high-fibre diets it was a few years ago, and the only link I can find was a Daily Mail article in 2007, so I am not convinced that it was more than a storm in a teacup.

I'd avoid the lollipops due to the choking hazard and the length of time that they last, coating the teeth in sugar the whole time. I would also watch out for fruit juice as it is sugary and acidic. The other stuff seems ok. DD has more than that, but generally no sweets and chocolate very rarely. I was very rarely allowed sweets, chocolate, biscuits and cake as a child. I think this may be why I have a sweet tooth now as I rather obsessed about the forbidden fruits.

And while I'm at it, is there anything wrong about giving him watered down fruit juice about half the time? He does drink water, but will only drink small amounts and I worry he doesn't drink enough. If I give him watered down juice he'll drain the cup. I'm meaning using fresh fruit juice I the same proportion to water that you would if it was squash. Maybe three tomee tippee cups a day? He drink milks too. How much are toddlers meant to drink?

oh, I hang my head in shame and will never tell on MN what my fussy eating nearly 18 month old has..... Your DS diet sounds amazing (though incidentally bran flakes are a very high sugar cereal says she who gave bloody coco pops 4 days in a row )

oh help- and she drinks 70/30 50/50 juice. Meant to be a teeth rotter but I too give it as more is drunk.

Stop worrying
watered down juice to that extent is no problem and yes I agree about it being important he gets enough fluids... its a balance and you're doing great.

Today For comparison... Is this high fibre too?

BF- muesli, yoghurt, blueberries. Bit a Doreen fruit loaf with butter.
2nd breakfast- scavenged bacon and sausage butty
Lunch- bowl of veg broth, hunk of bread, butter, piece of cheese, banana, quarter of a cupcake and innocent fruit smoothie carton.
Afternoon- apple and chupa chip
Dinner- lots of raw mushroom and carrot while helping me cook. About three mouth fills of turkey and veg stir fry and brown rice before saying he was full up. Then demanded some natrual yoghurt, mango and an orange half an hour later.

Yes I'm possibly getting worried now! Will shut up in a minute! Off to sleep soon , hormonal and feeling a bit pissed off with DH as he was annoyed at me for letting ds have fruit and yoghurt when he dudn't eat much stirfry. Not sure why I feel so defensive. Must be pregnancy

Op people would pay you a lot of money for letting us know how you get your child to eat so well!

I'm in awe. I feel lucky because once last week dd willingly asked for a nectarine.

Wow he eats a lot, and very healthy. I would not say you have to worry about his diet at all, just make sure he brushes his teeth the best he can manange after each meal, and if he has any decay just stop the lollys and give him chocolate or cookies for treat (lolly are mainly sugar, I think the other ones have less).

Are bran flakes high sugar? They are from the health food shop? Gosh! That I never new. Yes he has porridge, weetabix, oats too.

I usually give DD porridge with mashes banana. At the mo I go easy on the sugar because I have fillings galore plus I've got a crown and have had some painful extractions.

She's only two at the mo so there is plenty of time for her to eat sweets.

She eats fairly well so WRT sugar my worry is about her teeth.

Very similar diet to what my dcs have but totally minus the junk food. For me those treats would be way too much sugar so I can see what your dh means because a fruit heavy diet contains a lot of natural sugars anyway. Sorry, I am really not meaning to be critical, just more stating my personal preference!

I think it sounds great - very similar to what I give my toddler DS. He has oatibix every morning which I prefer to bran, grapes mid morning, our leftover dinner and yogurt for lunch, banana mid afternoon, a dinner like yours - he has a veg omelette today too! - and berries and cheese with it. I never give juice though but do bake little fairy cakes every now and again and he occasionally has a goodies bar.

I can't believe people are saying £200 a month is a lot! We spend £80 a week and I was quite proud of that that's everything though, inc all out lunches and coffees for work etc. I thought that was reasonable!

I'm not so daft as to think the way he eats has anything to do with me. He's always loved food and eaten everything he can get his hands on from the off. I'm just lucky that he's a good eater, I'm sure number two baby will be a different story!

I should say that yes bran flakes are high in sugar so dd only has them once a week. For breakfasts we rotate porridge, weetabix, french toast with fruit, croissants and yoghurt, home made muesli, pancakes with fruit, branflakes and ready brek.

Can you give me more meal ideas op? Seriously I'm trying for the whole family to be healthy and your ideas sound yummy but healthy.

I can't get over how much your DS eats.

For comparison, my (fussy as anything) 2.5 year old DS ate today:

BF - bowl of shreddies. Later, some of my weetabix minis with chocolate
snack - banana, heinz baby biscuit (hey they have vitamins in)
lunch - houmous and mini breadsticks, couple of bites of peeled apple
dinner - handful of chips (pointedly ignored the chicken and veg and cried at the suggestion that he might taste them). couple of yoghurts

Star wisher, there's not really much to it. He usually just gets whatever I'm having, or whatever's in the fridge. one thing I do as a habit though is makes a pot of soup when he's eating his breakfast. Takes ten minutes, I put it in the slow cooker and then there's always a cheap healthy nice lunch ready at lunchtime without any hassle. But it does help that he loves soul. I look after a toddler friend of his two days a week too, same age. He won't ever touch the soup!