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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Is she BU? Want to strangle her.

102 replies

poissonchat · 01/03/2012 23:13

Hi,

Just got back from a girly minibreak abroad- and everyone has come back pissed off with one another over one of our ex-boyfriends. I will give my friends new names, Emma, Amy and Ruby.

Yesterday night, we were talking about ex-boyfriends. Ruby is in a happy relationship new with a nice guy, but has had a string of idiots before- the last one which she is particularly sore about due to him leading her on a treat for the best part of a year. Let's call him Ben.

So me, Emma, Amy and Ruby are sitting down in a nice restaurant, and Ben comes up in conversation. Ruby is quick to change the subject- but Emma jumps in with this gem which apparently happened the day before we flew out; Emma works in the same office as one of Ben's friends, albeit a different department- they don't really know each other. Anyway that afternoon at the watercooler, Ben's dickhead friend says something along the lines of this; 'Oh, you're Ruby's friend? My mate Ben had her! Apparently she's got a really weird vag, have you seen it?'

Me and Amy are absolutely mortified and Ruby is extremely distraught for two reasons- she was never 'had' by this guy as she refused to unless she was officially his 'girlfriend', so the fact that he's going round implying that he's slept with her to random people (him and office dickhead aren't really that close, did the same course at college or something) and also she has a complex about her 'downstairs' which we've tried and tried again to convince her that it's nothing near embarrassing bodies standard (I think you can guess what Ben seemed to think was weird about it ;[)

Emma is insistent that she's done nothing wrong as 'she would want to be told' and 'we are on holiday, but it's the last night so nothing has been ruined' and 'it was probably best to do it now because we can all support her and bitch about him. Oh and Amy seems to think there's nothing wrong with it too as we're all 'so close'. Ruby was upset, not sobbing the place down- but certainly watery eyes and being off with us all evening, and when she got back to the hotel she was texting Ben demanding what he's been saying about her. She also is planning to book in to get her labia amputated (well, that's EXACTLY what it is, call it labiaplasty or whatever you want).

I've gave Emma a call and told her it wasn't on, but she told me to give it a rest as Amy thinks I'm taking it too far and Ruby wasn't that upset anyway (?). I seriously don't want her to get away with it, because I think it was vile just announcing that out at the table and putting Ruby in that horrible position :(

Is she BU?

Sorry for all the new names, (it's like a little story!) but it's easier than going 'he/she/her friend/her boyfriend/our friend/hairdresser's cousins' friend)

OP posts:
TheVermiciousKnid · 02/03/2012 19:20

Oh. Well, Linerunner, I hope you're proud of yourself. It's your fault that I've just shot all messangers I could find.

ManMinder · 02/03/2012 19:22

Meantime, back in the real world....

MainlyMaynie · 02/03/2012 19:26

Emma has probably had her sensitivities dimmed by working in an office where acceptable conversation includes commenting on acquaintances' genitals. In most places that would be a disciplinary.

Convert · 02/03/2012 19:42

I have got to see where this one goes.

TheOneWithTheHair · 02/03/2012 19:44

Me too.

ViviPru · 02/03/2012 19:50

me 3

ItsOnlyAQuestion · 02/03/2012 19:55

You're all petty nutcases.

ItsOnlyAQuestion · 02/03/2012 19:56

Oh. and an Emma was the biggest cunt i ever knew in my life.

Chubfuddler · 02/03/2012 20:01

You are completely right mainly but I have worked in a place where a conversation like that would have been well within the norms of water cooler chat. Not right but it would. Virtually everyone there was barely out of sixth firm both in age and maturity.

lisaro · 02/03/2012 20:02

I read Pinnochio to my nephew over the phone today. Godd story, but no scabby minges in it.

puds11 · 02/03/2012 20:02

does rubys new bf care about her vag? if not, why does it matter?
if its really bothering her that much, then she should have the op

cant say ive ever seen my mates fanny though!

fridakahlo · 02/03/2012 20:04

I have large labia and I've had numerous sexual partners (that is not in any way shape or form a stealth boast) and no-one has ever commented on them negativly.

MsWeatherwax · 02/03/2012 20:04

If Ruby joins this site: vaginapagina.livejournal.com/ she could look at the Everyday Bodies Project and see that long labia are common and just as beautiful as the short kind.

OhDoAdmitMrsDeVere · 02/03/2012 20:08

What did NHS direct say?

LineRunner · 02/03/2012 20:10

I take pride and comfort wherever I can find it, VermiciousKnid.

BalloonTwister · 02/03/2012 20:12

Grin at fridakahlo

slowburner · 02/03/2012 20:12

Your 'friend' Emma is a bitch. She has no tact and no concept of timing.

Your friend Ruby is clearly devastated, and as said by pombear maybe she does need to talk to someone, maybe she would be given a confidence boost and have the operation. I wouldn't see it as a bad thing and would say to her you will (as friends) support her in her decision.

I would perhaps subtly suggest 'emma' is not told if the op takes place. She might decide to share that next time she is by the water cooler with the year 11 set.

ChickensHaveNoLips · 02/03/2012 20:12

So, you're grown women who discuss vaginas and the weirdness thereof at dinner? Interesting

fridakahlo · 02/03/2012 20:20

Phew Balloon for a moment there I thought I'd been given a biscuit!

KatieScarlett2833 · 02/03/2012 20:21

Kniddy why all the shotgun violence?

TheVermiciousKnid · 02/03/2012 20:32

Well, LineRunner said something about shooting the messangers! I was only following orders. [innocent]

Grin
LineRunner · 02/03/2012 20:37

I'm more embarrassed about the spelling mistake than the violence.

KatieScarlett2833 · 02/03/2012 20:39
Grin

Nutters the lotaya!

Moominsarescary · 02/03/2012 21:41

Nhs direct have said nothing yet, ruby will still be waiting for a call back from a nurse who will inform her that there is nothing the doctor can give her to make her fanjo prettier

Unless they now write prescriptions for vajazzels

And maybe some nipple tassels to go with it

formerdiva · 02/03/2012 21:58

Do creative writing clubs let you base stories on unattractive fannies? I can't see this one ending well

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