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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think that DH was actually a prostitute...

102 replies

NameChange7483921 · 27/02/2012 23:21

First off, I really do not wish to trivialise the experiences of "proper" prostitutes - this is a light hearted thread.

Right. Namechanger, for obvious reasons.

DH is bi, which I have known forever, I am too, no big deal. We are securely married so it isn't an issue.

A few nights ago, we were talking about exes. He told me about a few girlfriends, then asked me what exactly constituted a relationship in my eyes. I said somebody who you would introduce to your friends as a boyfriend/girlfriend, so he asked whether it counted if you spent lots of time together, shagged regularly, but didn't go public. I asked for more details in order to make my judgement.

First off, he told me about a couple of kind of boyfriends (tbh I think they were more friends with benefits as it was just sex and hanging out - no actual feelings etc) and then he told me about another, but then corrected himself, because he "only did it to fill the fridge and get drinks and drugs"

Apparently, when he was at uni, two older men used to have him round to their house for threesomes etc, and in return would buy him drinks all night and give him food for the week, fags, drugs etc (only the usual recreational ones). Being a student, he thought it was great.

I pointed out that he was technically a prostitute, and he denied it as they didn't actually give him cash.

He also used to apparently trade sexual acts (with men and women, usually a lot older - he said he would have never gone near them normally) for stories when he was briefly a journalist.

He doesn't seem bothered by it at all, btw, he was really matter of fact about the whole thing - it was all over a decade ago now. He actually regrets that he turned down doing gay porn.

So, what do we think? Is the journalism thing just par for the course?

(sexual health is fine, btw, all tested etc)

OP posts:
TotemPole · 29/02/2012 18:27

Oh god, it's worse, I just googled & it's space docking up the bottom. ShockShock

VeryStressedMum · 29/02/2012 18:31

He doesn't see it as prostitution which is why he wouldn't agree with you calling it that.

VeryStressedMum · 29/02/2012 18:36

Bloody hell I thought I knew it all but had to look up iglooing and space docking. Just lovely.

ChickensHaveNoLips · 29/02/2012 18:36

I've had sex for babies. I'm a right hoooooaar.

OriginalJamie · 29/02/2012 18:42

I've had babies for piles

ChickensHaveNoLips · 29/02/2012 18:42
Popoozle · 29/02/2012 18:57

Why, oh why, did I forget the golden rule of MN. "don't google anything anyone ever mentions googling". I don't know which is worse, space-docking or iglooing Shock.

Popoozle · 29/02/2012 19:02

To answer the OP's question though (sorry, my trail of thought had been diverted by rudeness) - yes, technically speaking your DH was a prostitute.

Although, as he's been declared STD free & all this is presumably well in the past, I wouldn't really worry that much about it. We all have a past - maybe not that colourful Grin, but we all have one nonetheless.

AnyFucker · 29/02/2012 20:54

I once risked it for a biscuit

Spuddybean · 29/02/2012 20:57

i think my DP does it for a quiet life...or maybe so i cook him breakfast

i'm about to google iglooing and space docking - someone told me what cream pie was the other day :(

Spuddybean · 29/02/2012 21:01

:( i was eating a sandwich

OriginalJamie · 01/03/2012 15:51

Popoozle - my past was so colourless as to barely qualify as a past......

DinahMoHum · 01/03/2012 16:25

id be furious if id told my partner something about my past that was not an issue to me, or affected anything now, and they insisted on giving it a loaded name and judging me.

mathanxiety · 01/03/2012 17:58

She didn't say she had negative associations with the term prostitute or that she was judging him. She might feel sorry for him that he had so little going for him at that time that he thought he needed to trade sex for food or drugs. A lot of people see prostitutes as victims and not objects of scorn.

OriginalJamie · 01/03/2012 18:09

yy OP seems fine with it

hedidit · 01/09/2012 07:56

what do you think a transactional sexual relationship IS, its a fancy name for prostitution lol, nothing wrong with it, no one is perfect, no one has the right to judge others unless someone was hurt through deliberate act or stupidity of others

Tee2072 · 01/09/2012 08:01

Zombie thread.....

FriedEggsAndHam · 01/09/2012 08:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

bragmatic · 01/09/2012 09:06

I gave my husband a blowjob once, in return for a sleep in.

What does that make me?

TheGOLDCunnyFunt · 01/09/2012 09:12

This is an old thread.

Sallyingforth · 01/09/2012 12:56

Why do you make a big deal about the name?
It's what he did that counts. It either matters or doesn't matter to you. Changing the name won't change the deed.

lovemykaygees · 01/09/2012 13:05

I remember this! #yawn

MrsRajeshKoothrappali · 01/09/2012 15:01

He sounds very resourceful.

I don't think someone filling your fridge after a threesome is prostitution. More like an exchange of favours!

:)

SirBoobAlot · 01/09/2012 16:11

Why are people bringing old threads back to life so much recently? Eugh.

Though I did just google "iglooing". Ew.

GiserableMitt · 01/09/2012 16:18

I googled Iglooing, Space Docking and Cream Pie. Sad

Curiosity, cat, etc...

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