WIBU to book a 'pamper' party for 7yo?

[GreatBallsOfFluff]

DD is turning 7 soon and I'm trying to think of what to do for her birthday. For the last 3 years I have hired a hall and had an entertainer/dj but I simply cannot afford it this year.

I'm really not good with entertaining and interacting with other people's children which is why I've always done that sort of party. The thought of having 7 or 8 of her friends at my home to entertain for 2 hours fills me with absolute dread.

I suggested to DD going bowling with a few friends. She wasn't interested. I suggested taking her and a couple of friends to the cinema. Again, she said no. I asked her what she wanted, and she shrugged. I then (foolishly) suggested a pamper type party with nail varnish and the like. She really liked the idea

So I've had a quick look around the internet and found the following:

PAMPER 2)
The mini princess Pamper age 4 up
This glittery party is recommended for children of all ages. All products are non toxic & kiddie friendly where possible & always age appropriate. Shimmery make-up is applied to cheeks, eyelids & lip gloss to create fun glamour!

Price includes:

Themed invitations
Gentle file & paint for fingers OR toes
Glitter & sparkle non toxic polish & nail stickers/art (age 4+)
Glitter make-up Age appropriate make-up (shimmering cheeks, eye shadow & lip gloss)
Face jewels
Hair straighteners, crimpers & heated tongs.
Fruit punch fountain with pink plastic cocktail glasses & accessories
Glitter hair Highlights
Spray of perfume
Aftercare advice
CONTACT ME FOR MORE INFO

So I was wondering what you would all think if your little girl was invited to a party like this, or is it an absolutely stupid idea which I shouldn't even entertain doing, and convince DD that a perfect idea for her 7th birthday would be perhaps her first sleepover with her best friend?

Please be gentle

Nah, my son got sausages on sticks, cake, etc as well. He positively demanded pass the parcel. For his 14th, he had me to stay

you are very lucky then - its just the rest of us poor sods that have to think more creatively & come up with something new every year

let girls be girls, of course they'd love a pamper party.

My DD went to one for an 8th a couple of weeks ago.
they had all the usual party games going on, and the girls joined in in they werent 'having a treatment' she loved it.

My biggest sadness about it all though, is what happened to sausages on sticks, birthday cake and pass the parcel?

All alive and well in my house. DD is having a sleepover for three friends for her 8th birthday later this year. She has already put in her request for pass the parcel!

TBH we have a lovely time messing about with make-up and nail varnish and 'hair-dressing' between the two of us, and I wouldn't stop her going to that kind of party, but it's not something I would organise for her myself either (only because I'm saving it for when she's a bit older though).

I agree with someone else that there is a world of difference between a bit of glitter and nail varnish and full warpaint. Mind you I'd rather teach her to apply make up properly at some point than leave her to get on with like an acquaintance did with her DD - she's been going out since the age of 11 looking like a refugee from the Rocky Horror Show .

"My biggest sadness about it all though, is what happened to sausages on sticks, birthday cake and pass the parcel? Why do we suddenly feel we are letting our kids down if we don't do something huge and outlandish"

DD is 11 and that is exactly what we did at her last birthday party. I did a treasure hunt, but I let the girls (DD doesn't like boys) choose what they wanted to do afterwards and they What's The Time Mr Wolf, Grandmother's Footsteps etc. They loved it.

My dd is 7 and has been to a couple of these parties, I'd say she enjoyed them as much as she did any other bowling/build a bear/cinema party. I didn't object her going I didn't even really think about if it was right or wrong. It hasn't made her behave any more grown up or want to wear make up on a regular basis, maybe its adults making it into a big issue?! I wouldn't personally have a party like this but only because its silly to pay someone to put glitter and nail varnish on and would be cheap and easy to do yourself. My childs best party was an old fashioned tea party at home with pass parcel and musical statues with the furniture pushed back, it was cheap too!

Great post, CheerfulYank. Yes,if a boy wanted to have this kind of party,it would be fine because he should be allowed to express himself. But a girl isn't allowed to express herself in the same way for some reason? Some people seem to take a positive delight in telling you how much their boys are into all things pink and sparkly, while of course their dds would be strongly discouraged from it.

we have always just done a mix of parites, i did a 'build a bear' party for ds3, but we got kits and did them at home so it wasnt expensive and they had the usual party 'tea' as you describe, we have also had a water fight party, a star wards party where they had a bubble machine and light sabers made from foam insulation pipes and burst the bubbles, they still played pass the party and other normal party games. and they always have the usual party tea that you describe, having a themed party isnt necessarily lots of work or lots of money and its just about having fun. they parties i do certianly arent huge or outlandish, but just fun and to a theme of a childs choosing, so ds3 had the bears and a fairy theme and ds1 had an 'underwaterworld' theme once and i made lots of decoations of fish and sea life etc and they still had a regular party tea but the party bags had bits that matched the theme and they still played regular party games but with a bit of a twist to match the theme. we often have a crafty type activity at a party as well, again nothing expensive or fussy, just something to occupy them fora bit. we have also hired a hall and some cheap play equipment like a bouncy castle and just let htem run wild. i dont see this as extravagent.

Nothing has happened to sausages, birthday cake and pass the parcel. Quite often you will find them in the same party as someone doing a bit of nail varnish and so onl

exaclty halycon we do pass the parcel as well just with a bit of theme and an activity to match,the themes have varied and are chosen by the birthday child, or if htey want a more expensive party like bowling or soft play then i will do that but not every year and they understand that its a treat and they dont expect it every year or something bigger and better next time!

Well it clearly has for some kids who find it too childish at 7, HD.

What about throwing a party where the kids come in there own clothes and then they can play dress up into all kinds of costumes (Maid Marion, Robin hood, knights, princesses, butterflies, fairies and stuff) and maybe have a pro there doing face painting? Or have a dress up theme there like Harry Potter or something? Its sort of got the same feel without any of the scary "beauty myth" undertones and gets them to exercise their imaginations? And you can just chuck them in a room with a bunch of old cloths and hope for the best....

What children find it too childish at seven? I don't recall any being mentioned?

Your parties sound like great fun, 4madboys. Sometimes I think the best parties are the ones that have a mix of games and other activities, so there's something for everyone. I don't know why they are thought of as extravagant, when we hired a hall and had a bouncy castle and games, my dad commented that it was "very elaborate"

Midwives, I do think you have a point in that children do sometimes have to do things they don't personally enjoy for the benefit of other people.

That is what I have said to DD. She finds pamper parties boring, but it isn't her birthday - it is someone else's. The birthday girl presumably loves that kind of thing so DD should go and make the most of it for the benefit of her friend's special day.

I think it is just one of those things now - people bring children up in very different ways and so from younger and younger ages we have to learn to get on with people who have been brought up to act in very different ways to ourselves.

lol at your dad halcyon its not elaborate at all, its piss easy it what is is, a few games and the kids run around and jump around like loons, they love it and its easy to do. i try to go for fairly easy, a mix of some organised games and also just letting the kids play and have fun. i cant be doing with too much work but a bit of imagination goes a long way and children do like simple things so the star wars party with foam light sabers and a bubble machine was a huge hit, we did hire a darth vader suit and dp dressed up as darth to join in with the fun! the fact that it was july and REALLY hot and dp was in this massive black outfit with big helmet on and sweltering hot as besides the point, ds2 LOVED it and i gave the light sabers to each child to take home (bought foam insulation from b&q to make into the sabers) and then a few sweets etc for a party bag, so it was cheap!

and i think a bit of pampering, nail polish and doing hair etc at a party would be fine mixed in with the usual party games and a bit of a birthday tea. dressing up and playing with make up is part of growing up and its fun!

i think the links put up earlier in the thread to the USA beauty pageants etc are daft, its not the same comparison, they arent going to have that much make up on and they are wearing unsuitable clothes or parading in front of judges and being marked on their appearance and looks, its a party they will be PLAYING and having fun that just happens to include a bit of make up and getting their nails painted, i dont see the harm in that.

I saw this in threads of the day and thought it was about pampers nappies .

what a parent dressing up for a 10th birthday party? not too young if he has a theme he likes!

and lol fabwoman

OP, as you can tell from the thread so far this issue's a real can of worms and by going ahead you may risk not having some of DDs daughters there, or make some of the other mums uncomfortable. If I were you I'd save some cash, do a simple party tea and opt for entertainment along the traditional pass-the-parcel lines, make some fairy cakes and let them decorate them themelves, raid Baker Ross or Yellow Moon for some craft stuff to take home in a bag or box they've decorated themselves and have a Wii game going for them to drift in and out of. if your daughter's anything like my two by the age of seven she'll be forming good friendship with a smaller group of girls that are going to be around for a long while. You say you're not good at entertaining or interacting - perhaps having half a dozen round your kitchen table having some fun will be a chance for you to really get to know the kids she's mixing with and, if they stay, their mums/dads/carers too which could help you both in the future? Have fun!

DD's friends, duh!

My DD is still in my womb, so this isn't an issue I'm likely to face for a good few years but I thought I'd offer my 2 cents regardless. If/when she gets invited to parties like this, I would let her go but not with great glee. I disagree with those who felt these sorts of parties encourage sexualisation. However, I do think children are pushed to grow up too quickly. Childhood should be the happiest and simplest time in a person's life. It should be cherished, no need to rush them into teenagehood. There's plenty of time for that. Kids need to be kids.

DD went to one recently. They did their hair for them - just pretty bobbles, different styles, gave them a little bit of make up, some glittery nail varnish - nothing heavy.

then they did lots of organised party games with them. i wasn't sure about it about it but it was very gentle and age appropriate (five and six year olds) and dd loved it.

I wouldn't be happy about hair straitners etc. though.

I wouldn't book a party along those lines but I wouldn't stop dd going either. she just saw it as a bit of fun with her friends