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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think I can't possibly go back to this martial arts class even though it wasn't my fault?

84 replies

FecalVomit · 23/02/2012 16:44

Have to be brief as on my way out but I started a martial arts class after new year and LOVED it and have graded once already. Anyway last Friday instructor asked me to help him demonstrate something and wanted me to attack him. I got way over excited (medical issue) and screamed at him "come on you bastard!" and went for him really aggressively. Everyone gasped and the instructor didn't even demonstrate what he wanted to demonstrate, just restrained me and eventually asked me to "take a breather" in the changing rooms. He came in (unisex) to see me 10 minutes later and I explained my medical condition and he said it was absolutely fine and that he just wanted to make sure I was ok. I was but I'm so embarrassed that I can't see myself ever going again which is gutting because I really loved it and it took a lot of courage to go in the first place. He has since called me and asked why I wasn't there on Wednesday and I told him I'm still mortified at what I did and he laughed it off saying everyone has forgetten about it as competitions are coming up and everyone's mind is on that.
AIBU to think he's just saying that to make me feel better and I will be the talk of the dojo for weeks/months to come?

OP posts:

rhondajean · 23/02/2012 17:49

Panda is probably right too - we would all be going wow, shes got some balls, coming out like that to the instructor (we tiptoe round them a bit as they can accidentally punch hard if THEY get wound up!)

sandyballs · 23/02/2012 17:50

Do you have tourettes?

BigHairyGruffalo · 23/02/2012 17:51

I don't think you should be at all embarrassed about what you said to the instructor, I'm sure it was obvious to everyone that you just got a little too enthusiastic.

However, I must admit, if I were paired with you and you swore at me I would really not be amused. Have you explained your condition to the people you have sworn at and apologised? If you have, I can't imagine that they would be nasty behind you back and you should go back to the class.

Good luck!

hurricanewyn · 23/02/2012 18:23

Honestly - go back. You'll probably feel a bit uncomfortable for the first five minutes and then you'll realise that no one is paying you any attention and you'll be glad you did it.

The thought of it is worse than the doing, trust us .

I made a show of myself at toddler group once and never went back, and I've always regretted it since (my 'toddler' is 9 now - that's how long it's bothered me!)

runningwilde · 23/02/2012 19:10

Can I ask what your condition is? Is it a tourettes type condition?

Go back!

tasmaniandevilchaser · 23/02/2012 19:18

Oh bless, reminds me of when I did jujitsu years ago and my best friend was asked to do exactly the same thing - she bit the instructor on the ankle and 'worried' him like a terrier, am crying with laughter thinking about this, it was about 20 years ago!!! Sorry that probably hasn't made you feel better, but she went back, didn't let it bother her.

Do you think it would help if you explained to people about your medical condition? I'm assuming Tourette's....

I think you should go back, surely this isn't the first time you've shouted something enthusiastic at someone? I don't think people will be all that bothered, particularly if you can explain it.

iceandsliceplease · 23/02/2012 19:43

she bit the instructor on the ankle and 'worried' him like a terrier

Howling. with. laughter.

readyveg · 23/02/2012 19:45

Get back there. No arguments:) either explain or tough it out. You won't be the first to have done something unexpected when asked to attack a martial arts instructor.

RatherBeACyborg · 23/02/2012 19:47

Go back. It'll be fine. And fwiw I think you sound absolutely lovely.

RatherBeACyborg · 23/02/2012 19:49

Oh and although I don't have a medical condition to explain it I always get an unbearable urge to throw my keys down drains.

GoingForGoalWeight · 23/02/2012 19:50

I think you are fab! Maybe because there were children present people were a little more shocked, than without but even then peole may been been po faced/shocked. At least your passionate! Love it! I do not think i'd go back, sorry x

BelleEnd · 23/02/2012 19:53

Oh my God. I have tears streaming down my face. Especially at the biting like a terrier. Jeeeeeeeez this is funny!

I love you OP

coraltoes · 23/02/2012 19:57

Ha ha ha ha ha what a fantastic thing to do! Don't worry op. life is too dull. Thanks to you some people had a moment of liveliness.

Ratherbeacybrog. I am like that with eggs. Well I don't want to throw the down drains, I get an irresistible urge to crush them in my hand. Totally non medical.

coraltoes · 23/02/2012 19:57

Tasmanian. You nearly made me pee myself!

seaweedhead · 23/02/2012 20:02

The thing with embarrassing incidents is that you remember it and keep replaying it over and over in your head, but other people forget about such things pretty quickly afterwards.

Human beings focus on themselves and what's happening to them - not something embarrassing that happened to somebody else last week.
You should go back- people really will have forgotten about it or they'll not perceive it to be as bad as you think it was.

GoingForGoalWeight · 23/02/2012 20:03

I am exactly the same with my keys and drains, i thought it was just me
I get the urge to throw my car.housekeys into the sea on holidays, so we can't get home.

HELP MEEEEEEE

Coconutty · 23/02/2012 20:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

tasmaniandevilchaser · 23/02/2012 20:05

Just to be clear, my friend has absolutely no medical condition that would explain her behaviour, I don't think she could ever really explain it, apart from getting caught up in the enthusiasm.

OP you haven't come back, hope you're ok. What all these posts say to me, is that no-one would mind if you did that in front of them, and it would be a shame to give up a hobby you love.

fuzzPigwickPapers · 23/02/2012 20:08

What's the name of your condition? (naming it in the OP would probably have prevented a lot of misunderstanding

fuzzPigwickPapers · 23/02/2012 20:08

Or rather

rogersmellyonthetelly · 23/02/2012 21:04

Don't sweat it, I have had several incidents like that in my life and I don't have any medical condition to excuse me! Everyone behaves unexpectedly at some point, it's part of the rich fabric of life or else it would all just be a bit boring really. Please do go back, if you enjoy it, go for it. If people have laughed or commented does it really matter as they don't know YOU and they don't know about your condition so their opinions on it dont really mean much.

bejeezus · 23/02/2012 21:08

If I was in your class, I would think you were a legend and be really disappointed you hadn't come back

Chin up, chest out x

BabyDubsEverywhere · 23/02/2012 21:18

Hey OP, I have a disorder that makes me do/say odd things sometimes. It doesnt sound like yours, whatever it is, but just as damning sometimes. The best thing I have done in my recovery (well not recovery, i will never recover, im learning ways to live with it iykwim) is to learn to laugh at myself. Not in a degrogatory way, in a "OMG I cant believe I just did that what a narna" type of way. Its hard and very false at first. But it gets a much better reaction and actually allows me to re-enter situations I normally would have fled from. Much easier to be the clown sometimes than always the mardy misfit :)

And whether you like it or not, it was funny, embrace it, making people laugh is a wonderful thing really, much better than being a moody cow :)

theleanandhungrytype · 23/02/2012 21:25

go back! If I never went back to a place I'd felt awkward at, I'd never leave the house!

AKMD · 23/02/2012 22:17

Your instructor sounds amazing; go back!

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