To be a bit pissed off at how alot of us have this "Oh I don't think he/she is really that ill" type of attitude

[nobodyspecial]

I've been guilty of this in the past.

I have a terrible chest infection. So bad I'm on two antibiotics and have been told that if it hasn't cleared by Tuesday then I need to have a chest x-ray incase I have something more serious.

My husband last night was pissed off at me for handing our 6 week old baby over to him at 12am so I could have a hot shower to help relieve the coughing and wheezing.

I drove myself to the out of hours doctor (not angry at him about this, as we have 2 children at home and couldn't have taken them with us) at 2am. Turns out I had a temp of 39 degrees along with the cough and the doctor seemed quite worried and told me to take it easy and keep taking paracetemol and ibuprofen for the raised temperature.

I came back at 3.30 and he didn't even ask me how I was or what happened. So I said to him "don't you want to know what thE doctor said" His reply? "No one's ever died of a cough".....

I am SO angry at him I can't even face looking at him. Instead of taking a day off work today to help lookafter the children (I keep getting a fever every few hours) he pissed off to work at 6am this morning after changing DS's nappy.

I've noticed on alot of threads here that if someone is ill, the general consensus is that they're either lying or just want attention and that's how I felt DH felt about my breathing problems last night.

He's never done this before, because I've never reacted so badly to a chest infection before. I had a similar thing about 3 years ago, and even with the coughing, I coped. Maybe because I've had a baby recently and my immune system is really down I can't combat this crap thing, so he thinks I'm overreacting...I don't know.

Sometimes what we perceive as a sniffle, may not be a sniffle at all. It might be something really painful for the person suffering. Like yesterday, if the doctor hadn't taken my temp, I would never had known I was in a fever as my head and face felt cold and I was shivering.

Very long post. I know I am not being unreasonable. Please people, have a heart.

YANBU at all OP. Think about it - if you tell your mum you're ill, what does she say? And what does your DP say when you tell him the exact same thing?

My mum is all 'oh sweetheart, you need lots of liquids and a lie down' etc while DP is like 'You're ill? YOU'RE ill?? What about me? I'm ill too!!' etc ec.

To many people, saying you're ill is a red rag. All they hear is 'you aren't ill' and then it becomes a points scoring issue.

If I feel ill, then I am ill. Regardless of how ill you are. Or how easy I have it comepared to you. If Beyonce with her 12 nannies feels ill - SHE IS ILL.

BTW, people saying 'it's only a chest infection',well that's what pneumonia actually is. I know this to be true 'cos is what the consultant in hosp told me when my DD in for 5 days before xmas, after being told she just had a bad cold.
OP, tis miserable, hope you feel better v soon, and show your DH (some) of this thread!

I think my husband has been treated quite nicely on this thread actually. If I'd had a bit of "Leave the bastard" thrown in here and there then I might have shown him it

Leave the bastard!

No actually I do think he's being a complete twat about it. You are ill (as confirmed by doctors and everything!) and have also recently gone through something physically traumatic (the childbirth I mean) and have a young baby! It's a lot!

I think your husband is being incredibly insensitive. I also will add a tale I frequently post on here which is my DS ended up in hospital for a week with just a cold, and one particualrly horrific night he was almost ventilated as a result of the secondary infection he caught (not pneumonia). This infection is more common in children but the hospital did tell me that some adults had died from it. So you can die of a cough

YANBU - it is really hard when you are ill to look after children. You have a 6 week old baby, you have hardly got over the birth so no wonder you are feeling so bad. Do you have a friend/family to help you? You have my sympathy. xxx

I feel your pain OP. I'm lay on the sofa currently shivering after being sweltering 10 minutes ago! Very similar by the sounds of it. Went to ooh yesterday. DH was at work so my sister took me. I could have driven if no other option but I'm glad I didn't have to!
I've had pneumonia in the past and have a heart condition and asthma and you just can't take chances with these things. Temp 39 (which doctor said was high and a concern!) and peak flow was rubbish. I really tried!

I don't have dcs and whilst we are ttc (ov this weekend so no chance this month!) the very thought of having to look after kids right now puts me off ttc!
My DH was on the phone to his mum lat night and relayed I was a bit ill an then said he thinks he's caught it from me as he feels awful and described the symptoms I'd had since Friday! He's gone to work today whilst I'm off sick and he came home to make his lunch. I heard him coughing so i found myself asking how he was, had he taken anything, etc etc! Then proceeded to pop 8 steroid tablets and the horse tablet sized ab next to his paracetamol!

Men!!!

YANBU

I wouldn't ignore chest infections and breathing difficulties.

Well, actually I did as everyone round me was telling me it was nothing. It really started after birth of DD1. Ignored it for years despite being frequently so bad I couldn't make it up stairs or down street but it got better so I was alright and if I expressed concern I was given looks.

Turns out I have asthma and took fair bit to get in under control.

I swear DH thinks if he tells me I'm fine that it makes it true.

This Christmas despite the diagnosis and ongoing treatment and despite me not having a history of doing illness but gritting teeth and getting on - he accused me of 'man flu'. What I had was a very nasty chest infection which was making my asthma much worse. This was all worse because I hadn't gone for treatment straight away thinking I'd get better and listening to everyone telling me I was fine. It's taken along time to get over how ill it made me.

Thing is lequeen £10 notes aren't comparble to say care of children or seeking emergency medical treatment.

Oh I say Leave the bastard too. oh alright we might left you off mr special if you are very nice to mrs special

"Besides, if you're feeling well enough to be whinging about it online then, in my book, you can't be too ill."

Disagree!
Even when I was lying in a hospital bed with pneumonia with a temperature, hurting with every breath - I still posted on MN a bit. I was in an isolation ward at the time and when DH wasn't visiting I'd have gone mad with no contact with the outside world. My mobile internet on my phone was essential!!!

It doesn't take very much effort to use a laptop or mobile phone to post on the internet.