I didn't say anything to this new Mum, and now I wonder if I should have done...

[lurcherlover]

In Starbucks, a couple came in with their baby (brand new - no more than a couple of weeks old). Dad goes to get coffees, Mum sits down opposite me and starts to make a bottle up. She got a bottle of water out, mixed formula powder in it then proceeded to feed it straight to baby. Obviously therefore the water had been boiled at home, but allowed to cool while they were out. I assumed she didn't realise the bacteria are in the formula, but believed the widely-held myth that it's the water that's dangerous. I nearly said something - I wasn't at all going to be rude, I was going to say something along the lines of "I hope you don't mind me saying, but you'd be better keeping a flask of water straight from the kettle with you, mixing the powder in a bit of that and then topping it up with cooled boiled water so baby can drink it" - but I held off and didn't say anything because I'm a wimp I thought it wasn't my business. But afterwards, I thought, if it had been me and I was doing something (however unwittingly) that might be putting my baby's health at risk, I would want another Mum to tell me so in as non-threatening a way as possible. So I wonder if I should have said something. What do you think?

(Disclaimer: this is in NO WAY intended to be an anti-FF thread - I just wanted to point out to her the safest possible way to formula-feed her baby, not in any way to judge, so please don't think that comes into it)

This link really does explain a lot of the reasons for the 70 deg thing

'an old fashioned bitch'?

who said that? not me.

if anything, i think not being able to tolerate someone trying to pass on advice that might make your baby safer makes you look a bit silly, and maybe someone with unusual levels of anger . but not bitchy.

apparently when they brought in car seats a lot of people pointed to their undamaged older children and said 'well look at him, he's fine', in a similar manner. i imagine they also said 'i've not known any children who've died in car accidents'.

and it's true. you absolutely do not need your child in a car seat UNTIL they are in a car accident. so long as you can guarantee safe driving on your part and everyone else's, they can roam around in the back seat.

this is similar, i think. i hope i wouldn't have bridled at someone telling me that car seats were great back in the day.

MaryZ - all you can ever do is your best at the time :)

It was known, but not widely known at that time.

It is amazing how many people still don't know though, which is why it's always hard to know whether to say anything or not. If people know and choose not to do it, that's their choice/risk... but there are people who don't know, who would change the way they do it, if they knew the risk they were taking.

Because most of the time it may just be a 'tummy bug' or 'gastritis' and isn't attributed to the formula powder. They just don't know how many babies have been infected by E. Sakazakii (or by salmonella - another bacteria that formula can be contaminated with) because HCPs don't culture every baby that has a 'tummy bug' or track down the source of the contamination (be it poor hand washing before prepping the milk feed, poor washing of the bottles or ??).

Everyone has heard of bacterial meningitis, scepticaemia and Necrotising Enterocolitis, haven't they? That's just three of the illnesses E. Sakazakii can cause. Even if a baby has one of those illnesses they may not have the root cause tracked down...

also maryz, farking hvs often talk out of their arses anyway...

the discussion is definitely interesting.
i definitely never understood the microwave hotspots thing, though. i have a pal who works at the uni and does amazebo science things with microwaves and he was baffled by that no-no. his advice...? 'just shake the bottle'.

yyy maryz i am sure we were told not to use boiling water six or so years ago for that reason.

Oh dear, when ds was a baby I was told to make formula with boiling water and to let it cool. When dd was a baby I was told to make formula with cooled boiled water. Wrong on both counts?

They are both still ok.

I made.up bottles like this both my dc and they were/are fine.

but surely even if the thing is chock-full of hot-spots, agitating the h2o will disperse them? (that's wot my chum said). they can't re-coalesce, surely?

Oh god yes-the 'hotspot'. No microwaving bottles for my 2. I had one of those useless bottle warmers. Lovely entertainment in the middle of the night.

My ds' milk HAD to be made up with chilled water (Sma staydown) and he's fine, ds 1's bottled were made the night before and left in the fridge and he's fine too, I know it's the latest information and upto you to follow it but I would have thought you were an interfering busy body if you tried to tell me how to feed my baby.

up north we are trained in smiling and nodding and taking what we want from helpful old ladies from an early age.

Well obviously I am a shit mother, I always did it this way. Both my children are more than healthy and were never sick.

If you had stopped me in starbucks whilst with my dh I suspect you might have got some of that formula down your front.

So glad you didn't.

I think yanbu to have the dilema op. The instructions on the tin for making up formula only give info for doing it straight away at home from what I remember. And advice isn't routinely given unless you ask for it.
BUT I couldn't think of a way to broach it that wouldn't sound like a criticism so I probably wouldn't have said anything either.

I know, I don't get the microwave horror either, just shake the bloody bottle, it's not hard!!

Anecdote does not equal data!! Yes, plenty of babies are OK when the bottles are made up incorrectly, but being lucky is not the same as being 'safe'. The risk is small, but the consequence can be huge (death), we all weigh up risks we are prepared to take and risks we aren't, however, we can only do that when we know what the risks are.

you can't, really. not if you put the water into the micro. you have to shake the bottle to mix the powder.

I think I was told to make bottles with boiling water and leave to cool when ds was little, eight years ago. It was also fine to make bottles in advance and leave them in the fridge all day. I think I used to take a bottle of boiled water out with me, then add formula powder when he needed a feed. Mind you, by that stage he was 8 months, so presumably a bit less vulnerable.

i find this 'shit mother' stuff SO weird. does everyone think they know Everything About Parenting? i don't. does the defensiveness come from an actual lack of confidence?