I have namechanged.
At my 8 year old DD's school there is a group of mums, 9 of them. I have known most of them for several years since DD was at nursery with their DC. A couple of them live in the same road as me. The ones that I haven't known since nursery have been added to their group along the way, one knows one of the mums from tennis club and another lives next door to another one. I have always liked them all and got on well with them all, but I always feel they have excluded me a bit.
For example, they will arrange nights out and not invite me, yet invite me to others. Last time I went on a night out with them they were all talking about their previous night out to X restaurant and it suddenly dawned on me that I hadn't been invited on that one. I said "Oh, you didn't invite me on that one, girls" and one of them said "oooops probably shouldn't have mentioned that night out". They will invite me if they are having, say, a bodyshop party and want as many attendees as possible, but then other things they exclude me from.
I am probably the closest to one of them who lives a few doors down from me, we text each other occasionally and sometimes meet up for coffee, however for the past few months she has continually said about meeting up and then when I've suggested a day and time she has either been busy or forgotten or cancelled at very short notice. So I have now stopped suggesting meeting up with her, and am leaving the ball in her court.
The other thing they do is if one or two of them talk to me outside the school, they will be very vague with me and keep looking over my shoulder or behind them for other members of their group, and if they see one of them they will start smiling and waving at them and I feel they never listen to what I say, and sometimes are just waiting for me to go so that they can continue their conversation. One morning recently 3 were talking to me, they then all said they had to go, so I went off in my direction and they in theirs. A while later I went out in the car and saw them still talking in a group but they had moved round the corner to the other side of the school where they thought I wouldn't see when I'd gone. this morning two started talking to me and asking me about something that has happened to me recently, and I started talking too and next thing they were both looking over my head waving at someone wildly, totally ignoring what I said so I just said "Oh, bye then" and walked off.
I have decided I am not going to give them any more opportunities to exclude me. I am going to decline all invites out, and will say hello and be polite if I see them but it will be more of a "say hello and carry on walking with the buggy" than a hello and a chat. I am also not going to suggest any meet ups with any of them again. Another one of them and I went to an exercise class together once a week for a while but it dawned on me recently it was me making all the effort and so I stopped contacting her to see what would happen and she hasn't contacted me since. She always says she is busy yet has plenty of time for meet ups with the rest of them, but if I suggested meeting up in the day she would suggest a date in 2 or 3 months time because she's so busy, presumably hoping I would forget.
AIBU to think "stuff the lot of them"? I have other friends at the school, and other friend away from school btw. I don't think its me or anything I do/don't do, I think it's more that I'm not quite good enough for their clique.