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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to refuse to work 40 hours a week for £100?

87 replies

dimplebum · 07/02/2012 21:32

Basically, due to a raise in DH s wage, we are no longer entitled to tax credits to help towards to cost of childcare. Therefore, taking the cost of childcare into account, I will be working 30 hours at work and 10 hours from home for £100 a week.

I have been speaking to DH about it tonight and he reckons I should quit and spend precious time at home with our 2DSs. And then maybe get a weekend or evening job when DH can look after them. I would only need to work 15ish hours to get the same amount of money if I were to get say a bar job at minimum wage.

But it infuriates me that this is the situation, I love my job, I had to train for 4 years at university but £100 a week? Plus all the pressure that comes with the job I am in! I know I am not going to be in this situation forever, DSs will eventually both be full time at school but I feel it wouldnt be easy for me if I left the job now and tried to return once they were both full time.

It just seems so unfair and I am unsure what to do?

OP posts:
MateyMooo · 07/02/2012 21:34

I think this is the reason that people arent having large families any more.

WillCrossThatBridge · 07/02/2012 21:35

I don't think YABU to be frustrated and not want to work for that amount.
I have a stupid amount of post-secondary education and am in a similar position after paying childcare for our 2 DCs.

I think the crux of it is whether, by taking the time out to mind your kids, it will damage any future job prospects/career plans you may have - as you have mentioned.

Is there any option to build up connections and freelance in your area of work?
Or go part-time for a while while the kids are young?

McHappyPants2012 · 07/02/2012 21:35

could you go part time, do your job at weekend or work from home

asiatic · 07/02/2012 21:36

It isn't just for £100 per week, it is for continuing your career, developing your skills, pension, being in the right place to apply for a promotion once DC are at school, childcare takes a huge whack out of every mothers wage

ramblingmum · 07/02/2012 21:37

If you quite your job now how easy will it be to get back into later then the dc are at school? Any chance you could go part time , so more time with the dc and less child care means you wouldn't be that much worse off for now but might make it easier to go back fulltime later

LikeItsGolden · 07/02/2012 21:38

what asiatic said.

You wont be earning any more in 5 or 10 years time if you give up work now.

Original poster
dimplebum · 07/02/2012 21:38

I already work part time - 3 days a week. There is no option to work these hours over the weekend and no option of working less days. So the situation is put up with it or leave.

OP posts:
zippy539 · 07/02/2012 21:39

I know. It's crap. BUT when you say you are working 40 hours for £100 quid are you deducting all the childcare from your salary or taking it equally from your dh's as well? If the former then do you feel better when you re-calculate on the basis that you're BOTH working at reduced salary at the moment? Also can you look at it as you are working for X amount per week for the next few years in order to be able to continue in your chosen career once the dcs are at school?

RoughShooting · 07/02/2012 21:39

You could look at it that your dh should leave his job because of it, why should it be you considering leaving a job you love? Tax credits and childcare costs are a shared income/expense, not just down to you.

So being slightly more charitable, if you attribute half of the reduction to each of your wages, how does that look?

ReduceRecycleRegift · 07/02/2012 21:39

Its annoying, but I don't think of it as just what I'm earning now, but also of its value for future earnings and career options. Working now (for sod all profit) is an investment in my future

MrsSnaplegs · 07/02/2012 21:39

£100 per week is a lot of money to some people however we were in a similar situation and we opted for DH to become a SAHD when we only had 1 DC, we economised, meal planned etc and we are now better off on 1 income plus CB only with 2 DC. We readjusted how we lived, cut back on new purchases, only buy something if we can afford it and save for big things. it may be better for youSmile

RoughShooting · 07/02/2012 21:40

Zippy got there first!

RuleBritannia · 07/02/2012 21:40

At least you have a job regardless of what it pays.

IUseTooMuchKitchenRoll · 07/02/2012 21:40

It wouldn't always be £100 a week though, it's only that amount because you have to pay for childcare.

I would leave in your position though.

Sidge · 07/02/2012 21:40

For some people £100 a week is still worth working for. And it's not just the immediate 'money in your pocket' you're working for, it's maybe your pension contribtions, maintaining a professional qualification, maintaining a CV.

As you said it's not forever, before too long your children may be eligible for preschool funding, and then be at school so your childcare costs drop significantly.

It depends on the nature of your work - are you in it for the short term gain (ie the wage) or the long term benefits?

IHadADreamOnce · 07/02/2012 21:41

I'm in the same situation and we calculated this when I was pregnant with DD in 2007. I am a full-time SAHM as I have no family to ask to look after our DCs. I will return to work one day but the longer I spend at home the scarier the thought of attempting a return to the workplace. We use the calculator online to find out how much better of we would be with part/full-time hours various wages and due to the childcare costs with 2 young DC and taking into account the cost of fueling/taxing/insuring a car to get to and from work (rural so not easy for public transport and dropping collecting children) we never work out better of. I have to say I feel extremely lucky to be able to stay at home and raise the children as not a lot of people have the opportunity. Good luck whichever way you choose.

AnnoyingOrange · 07/02/2012 21:42

A lot of women work for less in order to keep their career, pension etc going. It's short term pain for long term gain

zippy539 · 07/02/2012 21:42

Agree with poster who suggested that your dh should also be looking at giving up his job if the situation is intolerable. Why should the onus always fall on the woman to stay at home?

Oakmaiden · 07/02/2012 21:43

An extra £400 a month seems worth working for, to me.

ivykaty44 · 07/02/2012 21:43

so what would be fair? Do you want free child care? Higher wages? Your dp to pay for half of the childcare thus reducing your burden?

HippoPottyMouth · 07/02/2012 21:45

You are doing 40 hours in 3 days?

Original poster
dimplebum · 07/02/2012 21:46

No, 30 hours in 3 days and then 10 hours at home as and when

OP posts:
BikeRunSki · 07/02/2012 21:46

I'll be working for about the same amount when I go back to work in September (and, btw, 7 years at uni and 15 years experience in my field). Currently on mat leave with DC2. But it's not £100 and week is it? It's £100 + National Insurance + Pension + car/medical insurance/other benefits + self respect + long term career development + maintaining your employability etc.... and, as you say, one day your DSs will be at school and (hopefully) your pay will increase. Apart from loving my job, and the reasons above, I am a specialist profession in a public sector organisation and I would be very surprised if I ever got a similar job again if I left.

You (and I ) are not the first, or last, families to face this.

forkful · 07/02/2012 21:47

Deduct only 50% of the childcare bill from your salary. Deduct the other 50% from your DH's salary.Childcare is a joint expense.

Things to think about:

Is your job providing a pension currently?

Can your and your DH's employer pay part of your salary as www.direct.gov.uk/en/MoneyTaxAndBenefits/TaxCredits/Keepingyourtaxcreditsuptodate/Changesthataffectyourtaxcredits/Familychanges/DG_185454 childcare vouchers.

How long until one or both DC qualify for 15 hours free childcare/week (term time).

How realistic is it that you would get back into your old job.

If you don't get back into your old job then what will the financial cost of this be: £1000's?

Are you also due to lose child benefit (if your DH is a higher rate tax payer).

How much would you be working for if you just had 1 DC in childcare (and if you had larger gaps between DC it would be the same when you averaged it out).

AnyFucker · 07/02/2012 21:48

A lot of WOHM have done this

it's nothing new

you have a net pay hit during the childcare years, in order to not get thrown off the career ladder and maintain their pension

it sucks, but it is what it is

presumably you are not all living off that £100 a week, so theoretically your H's wage is going towards child care too ?

would it work better for your dh to be more flexible with his job at this time ?