To send verbal abuse to my friend because she was a cow to me on facebook?

[SoggySocks]

I was having a get-together around at my house tonight and put up a facebook status saying "Can't wait for tonight, lots of chocolate, wine and giggly girls xxx"
Anyway my "friend" posted a comment on it saying "cringe". I replied "??? why cringe?" so she put "giggly girls? how old are your mates, 10?" Anyway to cut a long story short this went back and forth until I said "thanks for making me look a twat on facebook" and she said "giggly girls? you're referring to 30 year old women with children of their own as giggly girls? trust me you don't need me to make you look a twat, how patronising"

Anyway my night went ahead as planned but a few of the girls had seen all this before they arrived and I think it really damaged the night. It certainly damaged my mood and spoilt it for me. I'm supposed to be meeting up with this woman next thursday. AIBU to text her tomorrow saying she really upset me and maybe we shouldn't bother?

That's a bit shit Custy, did she contact you afterwards?

You'd only say something horrible about someone elses children if you wanted to hurt them as much as possible, being arseholed isn't an excuse either because even at my most pissedness it'd not enter my mind to do such a thing.

Very sad.

no she didn't. i don't want to know someone like that tbh. in my drunkest state i wouldnt do that.

I don't like women to be called 'girls', but after reading your post lueji I see what you mean about trying to recapture something.

'I'm 40 and I use it.'

40's not old!

You can't help but think that people speak their mind when they're pissed custy, but slagging off someones children goes beyond that into the realms of losing all power of reason.

It's something I would kill for find hard to get my head round.

I must admit I find those kind of status updates a bit naff and cringey as well, but I would not be rude enough to say it. She was obviously having a bad day and posted a snarky comment on hte spur of the moment - or perhaps as she cried off attending, she has a deeper problem she is sulking over, and wanted to get a little dig in?

Anyway, YWNBU to feel upset by her comment, but YWBU to take it up over fb for all to see. That's just juvenile. Now you've turned a small problem into a big one.

TBH, I agree with her. "Giggly girls" is unforgivable.

What a horrible bitch to slag you off that way in public.

I would block her of FB and make my excuses about meeting her today (or ever).

She was nasty - I see many status updates that make me 'cringe' but I would bot make a bitchy comment as everyone has the right to write what they like on their FB page and it is not anyone's place to judge people's comments 'publicly'

I would make an excuse not to see her and distance myself if I were you but I fail to see how her bitchy comments ruined your night? Don't give her so much power!

Who cares what terminology the OP used, the fact is that this so called friend was bloody rude. I don't let terminology in status updates bother me - if my friends want to use terms like "giggly girls" then great, the OP wasd expressing that she was going to enjoy a fun evening and for whatever reason this "friend" took exception to the words she used - how rude and how sad her life must be to let it get to her to such an extent that she had to comment.

Tell her she was bloody rude and delete her.

I wouldn't have commented on your original post on FB but would have thought the same as she did.

I remember a friend saying she could imagine a certain hair dying getogether I had with a couple of friends...she used the phrase "girlish laughter", but she meant no harm, much like your fb posting.
I did kind of cringe reading the email, but didn't mention it.

Your friend was rude, but it would be better if you didn't send her "verbal abuse".

Go ahead and cancel your planned date with her, but not on her fb wall.

Just delete the original messages, and then put something like "had a great night last night, sore head this morning though" or similar and just ignore this woman. If she put anything else just ignore it, be the bigger person. Sounds like she was probably just jealous it was going ahead without her.

It was a little bit cringey but your friend should have said nothing at all. I think many women like to post like that as it momentarily takes them back to their younger days when they felt giddy and pretty and the world was at their feet. Nothing wrong with that at all, it just makes insecure people baulk and some of them will post to 'puncture' that good feeling if they can.

Ignore her. She knew what she was doing when she wrote the comment so she must be ready to cut ties with you if she did something so spiteful.

I'm in my late thirties and when I have a few drinks with my best friends we turn into giggly girls too. What of it? We're not pathetic and fluffy.

And who cares? Rise above it. I don't think you think much of her anyway.

It was a cringey status & if a friend of mine had put "cringe" I would have laughed at myself with her.

Sounds as if you aren´t friends-well, certainly not anymore!

Oh and if the night was damaged-you all sound a little bit sensitive!

Oral communication involves words through talking. It is spoken communication.

Verbal communication includes rate, volume, pitch as well as articulation and pronunciation. Verbal communication also includes sign language and written forms of communication.

I'm just wondering, was she invited to this get together? If not, do you think she had wanted to be? I would have cringed at 'giggly girls' but would never have written that on your wall, but if she was upset about not being invited then I can see why she did it.

I would have cringed too, but would never have posted anything. I have a few FB friends who do the whole lol xxx hunnie thing and it sets my teeth on edge, but they are lovely people in RL and so I read, cringe briefly and move on.

Not sure your 'friend' is a very nice person, but I would not carry this on via text. Either speak to her, sort it, or delete and move on.

How pathetic, both of you.
Sad behaviour by grown women.

Yes, just telephone her and talk about it.

Honestly though, is it worth ending a friendship over?

Your original post was a bit silly, yes but far from offensive. Instead of being angry, I would count yourself lucky that you have discovered that this 'friend' of yours is, in fact, an utter bitch. Don't respond to her but act with the dignity that has hitherto been missing in this whole sorry saga. Delete her off fb and in rl. With friends like these......

Looks like she had a point though, with the childish dig

Oh dear. Plus ca change. FB is the work of the devil.

But I'm glad to see that I'm down with the cool kids who are apparently not on FB

Very childish behaviour on both sides but I don't get the number of responses who think that her friend had a point. Even if you didn't like the wording the OP used in her first post surely the correct behaviour is to keep it to yourself not try to publically embarass her about it by sniping on facebook?
OP either block her and cease contact or if you value her friendship and she is usually nice then phone and ask for an explanation. Nothing good ever comes of abuse via text.

She was right. Uber cringe