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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think DP should have shown some common sense

87 replies

Corpse · 03/02/2012 20:59

It snowed overnight here and I was at work early so went to the car at 6am and turned the heating on and everything with the idea that it would take 15 mins or so for the windows to clear. Anyway I was sat there and realised I had left a load of records in the house. I text DP (who I knew was up) and asked him to bring them to me (he often does this to me) and so he opened the bedroom window and just THREW the folders from the first floor window. They were not secure and so hundreds of important files and records just flew EVERYWHERE. I mean, in next doors garden, stuck in the tree, onto the road, they just went literally everywhere. I could only gather around 80% of them and am now in some serious shit at work. DP is refusing the accept that he should have any blame in it whatsoever. I'm so angry at him, if I'd have done that to his files he would go fucking mental.

AIBU to think he should acknowledge that he was being a twat at the very least?

OP posts:
pooka · 03/02/2012 21:32

So what! She wanted to stay in the car (engine running to warm it up/defrost windows). He has asked her similar favour in the past.

Even if she was being lazy as a sloth, it does not excuse such shitty twattery.

I cannot understand why people are saying the subsequent loss of files/potential loss of job is the OPs fault. It's bizarre.

Original poster
Corpse · 03/02/2012 21:32

Yes maybe I should have gone and got them myself but I wasn't feeling well this morning and just asked him for a favour, like he often asks me for a favour. There was no need for him to be a twat about it. He half heartedly helped me look for them earlier but spent about 15 minutes laughing uncontrollably at one of the papers "waving at us" from the top of the bloody tree.

OP posts:
AgentZigzag · 03/02/2012 21:32

I text and ring DH from another room in the house minibmw Shock

It doesn't cost anything and if it makes me a lazy fuck...

rhondajean · 03/02/2012 21:33

So none of you have ever asked your DP to do something for you?

I'm sorry, I thought the point of being partners was that you helped each other out!

magicwoodyallenzombiejesus · 03/02/2012 21:33

Fuck me. Even my DH wouldn't be such a numpty (although he did throw a xmas tree to me out the window once...with the fecking sand weight stand attached).
But come on. Really? Your DH was an arse. YADDDDNNNNBBBBUUUU and I am very very sorry for your predicament (albeit my DH is saying hooray as he looks good in comparison - but I am about to remind him about the tree).
Sorry OP.

ohbugrit · 03/02/2012 21:34

I am Shock that he thinks he didn't do anything wrong!

I would be literally dumb with rage. I actually can't think of what he could possibly do to remedy the situation. Whatever it would take would have to start with the production of the remaining papers.

What a total fuckwit!

hermionestranger · 03/02/2012 21:35

Op was staying with her car whilst it cleared. Something that is forever being told to us to do in this weather!

Not her fault at all! I would be beyond livid!

ISayHolmes · 03/02/2012 21:37

He laughed while you tried to get one of the papers? He does realise that this is your job and career that could be damaged by this? Does he not give a shit at all about the trouble you're in? Just ugh.

ILoveOnionRings · 03/02/2012 21:38

If they had a drive that was a mile long with car and house at opposite ends then I think the Op may have been unreasonable to ask. Of if she had asked him to deliver them to the car on a silver plate with one of them silver domes on top in a full butlers uniform the Op may have been unreasonable.

But to ask DP a civilised question / favour where he could have answered a simple yes or no like most civilised people then no the Op was not unresaonable.

He chucked them out of the window, rather than reply, which I assume would have taken far more effort than pressing either 2 o3 letters on his phone and pressing send - that I believe is unreasonable

PippiL · 03/02/2012 21:38

And you were poorly too? Sorry, feel shit for saying ywbu even more now!

Original poster
Corpse · 03/02/2012 21:41

I'm getting over a chest infection and have only been back at work 2 days. Still not 100% but can't stop off any longer unless I'm dying really. So anyway it minus 3 degrees here this morning, he would have been leaving the house soon after me anyway so it wasn't as if he was all tucked up in bed.
I just don't know what to do really because even if they are all found she's going to know they were out in the elements and she'll still go off on one about the state they'll be in. Really don't know what to do.

OP posts:
Morloth · 03/02/2012 21:42

What a shitty thing to do.

Am amazed that anyone thinks this is your fault, madness.

ILoveOnionRings · 03/02/2012 21:42

Magic including the sand weight, that has made me laugh.

nocake · 03/02/2012 21:42

I was going to write that it depends how you phrased the request but I realised that while refusing to bring out the files may be a reasonable response (depending on your text) throwing them out of the window is never a reasonable response.

What was his reason for doing it?

Morloth · 03/02/2012 21:44

Tell her the truth Corpse, nothing else you can do really.

Original poster
Corpse · 03/02/2012 21:44

his reason was that he "thought it would be quicker" and "didn't realise they were not secure".

Oh and it's my fault for not securing them as they were my responsibility and not his. So next time he asks me to bring his laptop to the car, I'll just chuck it out of the bedroom window as it's "quicker".

OP posts:
ILoveOnionRings · 03/02/2012 21:44

Corpse could you photocopy or reprint any of the pages and replace the grubby ones?

Original poster
Corpse · 03/02/2012 21:45

She's going to hit the bleeding roof and keep on going :( really don't need this right now.

OP posts:
rhondajean · 03/02/2012 21:45

It's not stuff you have electronically and can print new copies of?

magicwoodyallenzombiejesus · 03/02/2012 21:46

He laughed at the papers waving at you...he likes to live dangerously doesnt he
Funny though that image is, it just would have made me kill him.

He remains a twunt.

Original poster
Corpse · 03/02/2012 21:46

Not really Onion as they're signed and counter signed and "official" documents for "official records". The type were if a blob of tipex is spotted the whole thing gets discredited and enquiries made etc.

OP posts:
nocake · 03/02/2012 21:46

DW's question is... what else is behind his action? It smacks of the behaviour of someone who is pretty pissed of with you. What has happened before this?

PippiL · 03/02/2012 21:47

I think you have to just tell the truth. Photocopying might help if there aren't signatures on them etc.

Then a discussion with dh.

rhondajean · 03/02/2012 21:48

Well if you get everything, you have to say, you dropped the, in a puddle of slushy snow, were drying them at home and were terrified to tell her. Either that or fess up. Can't think of anything else.

fridakahlo · 03/02/2012 21:50

How old is he exactly? Thirteen?
No, YANBUAA!
Was going to suggest something along the lines of ILoveOnions. Any chance of rectifying the situation by doing that?

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