To think that a SAHM of school age children has no reason not to...

[donteatyourteawithnoknickerson]

exercise if she wants to?

Background - I work full time, have two DDs (6 & 8), am studying for my Masters, do all my own cleaning, ironing, cooking etc (with DH obv) and still manage to go to gym 3 times a week. I am no skinny minny (size 16 - 18) so not a fitness freak.

A friend of DDs mum asked me tonight if I'd been to the gym when we were picking up from brownies. I said no, for a swim, and she asked me what i had done and I told her - 20 lengths.

To which she replied - oh you're so good, you're lucky to go to the gym. Previously she has said she wants to lose weight etc.

Now her DH earns waaaaayyy more than me and DH combined. So why doesn't she find the time when her DDs are at school to exercise if she wants? It's not a question of money....

Some people just don't 'do' excercise do they?
I would fall apart if I didn't excercise 3 times a week, I do it to de-stress so I do it for my mental health and general fitness. You're suggesting you do it for weight loss, and that your friend should be getting off her behind and excercising to loose weight too?!?

If so, YABU.

awomanscorned shucks, thanks.

naturalbaby YABU to assume I am doing it for weight loss, because I said my clothes size? Actually I lost 3 stones 2 years ago and am perfectly happy with the weight I have maintained since, thanks. I have no desire to be a size 12, never mind an 8. I am a curvy woman, but that doesn't mean I have to be unfit

I guess she doesn´t want to go.

Can´t say I blame her!

No offence OP but if you are in the gym 3 times a week how are you still a size 16-18?

''I'm not "bothered", just got me wondering what I would do all day in her shoes..''

You know her quite well, why don't you just ask her?

Anyway, going to the gym is bad for you - fact - I wrote my car off one morning on my way to the gym I used to go at 6.30am before work, beat that for a stealth boast

How dull, why would something so bloody boring bother you anyway? Yawn.

If your post isn't judgmental, what is it then? Concerned? I think not

I'm a SAHM with plenty of time on my hands but no way could I be arsed to go to the gym. I think she was just being polite...

Yes she can exercise if she wants to. She obviously doesn't want to - it's not for everybody. Don't see what money has to do with it, if she really wanted to lose weight/get fit there are other ways to exercise that don't involve joining a gym.

Maybe if she mentions it again you could ask if she fancies coming along with you next time? She might be hinting?

OP is she waiting for you to ask her to go? Perhaps she doesn't want to go by herself. I would love to go to the gym, but won't go on my own. I am dragging my youngest wih me over summer, though.

People seem to have a lot of opinions about what SAHMs of school age children should be doing.

It's weird.

apologies because I probably just burn off the extra calories in treats, that's why I've maintained. And there are all shapes of size 16 - 18 you know lol

mustcontrol because that would go beyond wondering, and be rude. Still don't get the stealth boast thing. If I were to stealth boast, i'd do it irl, I would think, not on an internet forum....

There are not really "shapes of size 16-18" - it's a myth we tell ourselves. Unless you are over 6ft tall and particularly broad shouldered - which you may well be of course - size 18 is size 18.

Perhaps she lacks the self confidence to go.

As someone who was a very happy and busy SAHM for many years I did find my self confidence was not as it once was pre kids. Being overweight (both hugely and getting down to slightly overweight through diet alone) also made it difficult for me to find the confidence to go to the Gym.

I am no a bit of a saddo Gym bunny. Am back to being an unemployed sahm/housewife - this is all I can do to pass the time atm.

Perhaps she is hinting that she may like to accompany you - as she is too scared to go alone.

Maybe she is just lazy.

Maybe she was just making polite convo for the sake of it.

Why if your life is so busy and full do her comments effect you so much?

I am a SAHM of 3, my youngest started school in September and for ages before this I had big plans. I was going to do a part time college course, keep the house shiney and most importantly join the local gym to get fit and try and sort out my sore back.

Unfortunately, the law of sod intervened and decided I should start having epileptic seizures and that my back should be as painful as possible as often as possible.

So now the only exercise I get is walking the children to school and back and opening the packets for all the drugs I take to make this possible.

Not everybody wants to be stuck at home, some people don't have any choice. Then again some people do have the choice, but would rather stay at home. I can't see how it's anyones business but theres either way.

You don't have to join a gym to get fit or lose weight. Just put a paor of trainers on and go for a brisk walk for 20-30mins a day. I lost a stone over 3 months doing that and no dieting.

"pair" of trainers, even!

awomanscorned you've really got upset about this, haven't you???

:o @ awoman

Perhaps she's read the article about all the minging, skanky germs in gyms. Left by sweat, skin and spandex.

Is she thinner than you op?

That's why i dont use gyms. The sweaty handlebar syndrome, ugh, cant do it, its germ central!

I am a SAHM and go to exercise classes 3 days a week (1 of the days I do 2 classes back to back). I need them to get out of the house and to get adult conversation so it is a social occasion as well. I only joined the gym about 4 years ago at the ripe old age of 34 and I am determined to keep going.

I don't think she wants to. I think she thinks she ought to want to. I had 10 years of having the time to "go to the gym" and I would make noises about thinking how great people who go are, because it's sort of expected of you, but nah, that kind of exercise is not my idea of fun.