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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to feel a bit uncomfortable with this event?

146 replies

PamPerdbrat · 28/01/2012 22:18

There's a ladies night event on next Saturday that a few friends and I have been invited to. The dress code is 'emergency services' and so other ladies have bought outfits from Ann Summers (naughty nurse outfits etc) with all hotpants and boobs out...

I don't know, it just doesn't sit right. I know I should go along to fit in because everyone else is. But I don't want to dress in a way that I feel cheapens me. I almost feel like its a bit degrading actually. But then, am I just being to sensitive? I am a bit that way this week Confused

OP posts:
pictish · 28/01/2012 22:20

So don't.
If they want to wear skimpy outfits, that's grand. If you don't, then that's grand too.

squeakytoy · 28/01/2012 22:20

just dont go.. you arent going to enjoy it, it isnt your thing, so why go?

YANBU to not go.. YABU to judge the others who do go

AnyFucker · 28/01/2012 22:20

if you want to look like a nob, go for it

alternatively, keep your dignity and don't buy into this man-pleasing bullshit

troisgarcons · 28/01/2012 22:21

I agree - Ann Summers is for the bedroom, not the street.

Original poster
PamPerdbrat · 28/01/2012 22:22

Never said I was judging others, btw. I just said I felt a bit odd with it but didn't know if I was being stupid and over sensitive. I can be a bit over sensitive sometimes.

OP posts:
AgentZigzag · 28/01/2012 22:22

Can you get hold of a paramedics boiler suit?

mistressploppy · 28/01/2012 22:22

Could you go, and wear a non-slutty costume?

AnyFucker · 28/01/2012 22:22

oh, and just to warn you, this thread is likely to kick off

as all the man pleasing empty-heads come along to tell you how "empowering" it is to dress like some sort of fuckable half wit

thepeoplesprincess · 28/01/2012 22:22

YANBU to not want to go. It's entirely your choice.

YABU to get to get your maxi judgey briefs on. If other people think it's funny, that's entirely their choice.

mistressploppy · 28/01/2012 22:23

x post with Zigzag, sort of

troisgarcons · 28/01/2012 22:23

Posted too quickly - I suggest you get your self some oil skins anda nebuliser and go as 50yo overwight fireman - coz thats all we get when the fire alarms go off.

That would seem prudent in the circumstances.

squeakytoy · 28/01/2012 22:23

But I don't want to dress in a way that I feel cheapens me. I almost feel like its a bit degrading actually.

That sounds to me like you are judging the others who are going. Apologies if that is not what you meant.

Original poster
PamPerdbrat · 28/01/2012 22:24

Sorry, just to clarify... I want to know if I'm being over sensitive with MY feeling a bit wrong about doing it. Me. If I wanted to judge my friends... Well, there'd be no point. They're my friends and that'd be weird.

OP posts:
Ragwort · 28/01/2012 22:26

Just don't go - sounds horrendous and yes, it is degrading.

troisgarcons · 28/01/2012 22:26

Mind you, Im now thinking of the "slut walk" threads .... and we should be all dressed like sterotypical hookers on the tout for business and stocious in our cups (cant remember whether pissing in the kerb and pulling your gusset to one side was acceptable or not - meh! take an empty lucozade bottle and nip behind a tree)

AnyFucker · 28/01/2012 22:26

you are not over sensitive

and if you feel yourself judging your friends, you wouldn't be wrong in that either

we can't help our feelings, especially when they are instinctive

Original poster
PamPerdbrat · 28/01/2012 22:26

No squeaky not what I meant!

Feeling a bit delicate today, probably not posting properly.

Is it bad to not go on the grounds that I don't like the idea though? I know I should probably go to be nice. I don't want to not go now, in case people think I'm being judgey Sad

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 28/01/2012 22:27

Pam, you are not being judgey

you are exercising mature common sense

don't be such a delicate flower

tell them you are not going, and tell them why

AgentZigzag · 28/01/2012 22:28

I'm sure you'd feel bloody awful if you got dressed up in something you felt a twat all night in.

Do you find you do a lot of things to fit in with the crowd?

I can understand if you went dressed in something not quite so revealing you might feel as though you're passing judgement on the others who do, but that shouldn't override what you want to do.

squeakytoy · 28/01/2012 22:29

You are not going to enjoy it if you feel uncomfortable with that sort of thing. It is not my cup of tea either. I wouldnt want to be parading around in a pub half dressed in some ridiculous costume either, and I would probably stay at home..

AgentZigzag · 28/01/2012 22:30

You don't have to tell them that's the reason why you're not going.

IUseTooMuchKitchenRoll · 28/01/2012 22:30

It's fine for you not to go if it's just not your thing, but it does sound like you are feeling sensitive.

They are dressing up for a bit of harmless fun, but if you find it degrading than that is your prerogative, you don't have to justify that to anyone. It sounds like you are taking it personally somehow, but we all do that sometimes.

Catsdontcare · 28/01/2012 22:30

Perfectly fine to not like the idea and to not go.

wherearemysocks · 28/01/2012 22:30

If you want to go, then just wear smething that you will feel comfortable in. If you think you wont enjoy it then don't go.

Not really seeing the problem.

Sidge · 28/01/2012 22:31

Ugh. Ann Summers clothing is for the bedroom and not the pub. If at all.

Why don't you wear a sou'wester and a yellow raincoat and go as a coastguard? They're part of the emergency services? Grin

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