to think putting your child in a costume for one day is too much to ask??

[imoanruby]

It was world costume day this week at dd's school, she's in year 1.

It has been in the newsletter for the last three weeks, there have been signs up in the window of every class for the last two weeks. There are signs on the main entrance to the school and yet still so many children aren't in costume and i saw at least five in her year crying at classroom doors.

It doesn't take much, dd only had a chinese dress on. Some had Disney or superman costumes, one had even recycled his costume from the christmas play and one had a striped t shirt and a beret, no one expects anything expensive or elaborate but alot had normal uniform on and were really distressed.

I heard mums saying "well i didn't know" or "no one told me" when in truth i think they just can't be bothered. I know people work and it's hard but there was loads of notice...am i being unreasonable in thinking the parents should make more of an effort?

These are the bane of my life, i hate it agree completely with MI and BB I have three kids at school so it was 3 x one of whom hates costumes with a passion but is still upset when he gets there and isn't the same as the rest.

I'm in the if the want to they sort something out themselves and if they needed help and we had actually recieved some notice i'd help them make more of an effort, but thank god they never have

Like so many other 'fun' crazeee organised events they are frequently, as MI says 'complulsory jollity'.

The minute you have to do it or feel you ought to, it ceases to be fun and becomes a PITA chore.

MissBetsyTrotwood - for future use Harry potter, percy jackson and horrid henry are all v easy but involve normal clothes

I loved your DSs idea.

well make your mind up, you weren't judging at all, you were judging but quietly, you've said both now, so its not that convincing. Why do you care whether other kids are dressed up or not?

Or don't bother going to school that day, then say later you were there but they just couldn't find you.

Voila: You were Where's Wally.

In my day we didn't have this nonsense.

We had country dancing and being forced to hold Lee Allwright's hand aged 7 has scarred me for life. I'm sure it didn't do much for him either.

But at least we weren't forced to dress up.

Thank you very much, now I am having country dancing flashbacks and costume heebiejeebies. And don't even mention Sports Day [shudder].

Thanks Bat. I merrily shall; he looks like Harry Potter actually so that's a super idea! His whole class had to dress as angels for the nativity play (huge primary school) and God only knows how they got him to do that.

I raise you your country dancing for enforced jollity. I was nominated by our class to endure a practise wedding at the school church to another boy in our class. We 'got married' in church and 'had a wedding reception' afterwards in the school hall. WTF was that all about? Dressing up might have helped as at least I'd have been able to shed something of the horror of the day at the end of it.

I am definitely coming over all Jack Dee about this but I do find enforced jollity utterly grim.

Not "can't be arsed", "over it" would be more appropriate to tattoo on my forehead.

It's not that I don't want to do it (the first time I what I lacked in skill I made up for in enthusiasm) or that I don't enjoy it when they are delighted by my humble efforts, it's just that when it gets to dressing up for every bleedin topic and with 3 children you ending up making nine+ costumes per year it just gets...well...dull frankly.

MrsM: The tree costume was a sight to behold, glorious branches laden with handmade leaves in many hues - it stole the show. Definitely F off!

Fucking hell I hate dress up days. We are the sort of family who loses papers and forgets shit.

I am lucky enough that I can afford to just buy something and we now have a pretty decent supply for when I turn up at school and DS is the only one not in costume, I usually dash home and grab something from the box.

Not everyone is so lucky, they need to be limited to once a term at most, they are a royal fucking PITA.

Ninjas are good, black trackies, black t-shirt and if you have one a black bandanna for a mask.

YABU to be judgmental.

DD2 lost her letter about coming in costume when they had book day at shool a few months ago. DD1 did bring home a letter but the way it was written made it sound like it was just the juniors. And when I asked, both DD1 and DD2 agreed it was only juniors .

So we arrive at school and, to my horror, I see the infant kids all in costume. Cue mega meltdown from DD2. It's not a case of 'can't be bothered' - I'd gone out the night before to get DD1 the costume she'd been begging for, could easily have picked up one for DD2 - but shit happens!

I'd have been even more pissed off if, in addition to dealing with dd2's meltdown, I'd have had a tutting and judgy pants parent in the background!

Costume days are such tricky things. I'm in America, so we don't have Book Day or anything elaborate, but in the 6 years of preschool and 3 1/2 years of school, the kids have had fun days like dress up for Christmas, pajama and movie day, beach day (in the middle of January) and such that are pretty easy to dress up for. They get so excited and look forward to those days, but there always is at least one child (and usually only one) that doesn't come to school dressed up and they are so upset that they're the only ones not dressed up. I know some parents just genuinely forget, but it seems like it is pretty much the same kids from year to year that aren't dressed up, and I hate that in the midst of so much fun there are kids that are so sad.

That being said, the fun about our costume days is that they don't require things that aren't in their wardrobe already. If I actually had to sew or buy a costume, I'd be so much more bah humbug about it.

How do you KNOW you've never lost a newsletter, BOM? You've only seen the ones that reach home, that's all

I have never lost one either, I know because they are all numbered.

My friend is always complaining that she never gets them. In reality, her 8yr old emptied her own school bag & never gives them to her. You'd think after 3 school years she (friend) would catch on...but no.

I am a teacher and on our last dress up day (and please remember the teachers have to dress up as well) I had a child come in uniform despite 2 letters home, notices in newsletter and on school website, and the child had reminded Mum 2 days before when I had done a big reminder in class complete with suggestions about how it didn't need to be a bought costume but could be cobbled together from things at home - child reminded Mum and she told him it couldn't be a dress up day as Miss had not told her. Luckily I had taken in spare bits and he soon looked the part. This is a 5 year old. I accept some chidlren don't want to dress up and that is never an issue but this child was gutted and also cross as he had tried to tell his Mum and she had ignored 4 written messages plus her own child!

Give the DC some non-precious things e.g. scarves, belts, hats, old clothes of yours. Also have paper, cereal boxes, paint around if you have them. Cover all surfaces with newspaper and let them make something - you do not have to compete with those whose DM goes to the local theatrical costumier so they can arrive looking like Marie Antoinette or Little Lord Fauntleroy. You will have done far better because your DC will have accomplished something, other than the ability to boast.

Last night I wanted to cry! my child came home upset she was the only girl who forgot it was dress up day. As I work and don't get to pick her up I find it very frustrating that I just get ( or don't in this case) a last minute word of mouth message about dress up days. It just adds to the guilt! I wish my childs school sent out text reminders ,what a great idea, in fact any kind of note would do the job.

Same as Morloth. Thankfully this year ds' (year 3) response was to absolutely refuse to have anything to do with it on the grounds that he wasnt in fact 5.

World Book Day my arse when they're all dressed up as Spiderman.