To leave the kids "Home Alone"

[StickyVicky]

Yes or no answer needed really.

I am due to go out tonight for a birthday do. Babysitter has pulled out last minute and there will be upset if I don't go.

I have left the kids alone before and they've always been fine, however I've never left them late at night. This would involve leaving them from 7pm until around midnight.

They are 11 and 13. No friends come back here, I can guarantee they will be where I left them when I get home (xbox and laptop).

However I am aware that midnight is pushing it somewhat. So over to the jury - is it really irresponsible for me to leave them alone tonight?

Yes, they are only children.

I think a sensible, mature 13 yr old should be able to be left in charge for an evening. I know some people use 14 yr old babysitters and I've used 15 yr olds - not for a small baby, but for older children. However, I would only think it is acceptable if I am not very far away and easily contactable. They should have back-up phone numbers too and I would probably ring them at 9pm to check.

However, I would expect them to go to bed well before midnight!

In an ideal world at their age it should be fine...

However, personally I wouldnt. From 7-12 is quite a long time and I would feel too uncomfortable about it and wouldnt enjoy the evening. A couple of hours then yes but not 5! Obviously if they are super mature and you KNOW they will be fine with it then go, but at 11 I dont think I would haved liked it if mum and dad went out and left me for all that time.

So, I really dont know if you are BU or not but personally, I would cancel my night out.

I wouldnt leaven them late at night at that age.

I wouldn't. DS1 is a very mature 11, and I know he'd be scared left alone when it was dark let alone late in to the evening.

Yes I would, at 14 I was babysitting over night for a neighbour's 4 kids. I would keep my mobile on and check in every hour to check everything is ok. Are you going far away? Ideally I would want to be home if necessary pretty quickly unless there is a neighbour they can call on.

If you are confident that they will be ok, then go with your own judgement.

I'm sure you follow all the common sense rules about not opening the door & that you have a mobile that they can call you on.

At the end of the day it is a risk analysis exercise. If you feel your neighbourhood is safe, your DCs are sensible & you are contactable - the risks are very low.

Their ages aren't too much of a problem imo but do they fight?

That's normally the issue with siblings who are left alone.

I take it you all have mobile phones and you'll be able to hear it ring?

How far away is the venue from your home?

I suspect if you thought this was really ok for your kids, you wouldn't have bothered with a babysitter in the first place.

I would, at that age if you know they are sensible enough not to let their mates in and run wild, then they are fine to be left on their own.

Thinking about it, at 12 I was the babysitter.. I would have been mortified if my parents though I needed babysitting at 13!! They would have had to come and drag me out of the pub youth club first.

Can you give a neighbour a key & ask them to nip in & check on them? Leave phone numbers etc & come back earlier?
Alternatively get your frinds round to yours for a few drinks, make sure DC's stay in bed & go out a different night.

Strict rules about keeping door locked and not answering phone apart from you on mobile. Friendly neighbour to run to in case of problems. Phone call every hour. Don't drink so that you can get back quickly if need be.

Should be fine. Have a great time

How far away will you be?

I am normally quite prepared to say yes on threads like these, but I don't think I would leave them till midnight alone unless I was very close by.

Sorry, I assumed it was your birthday but judging by your OP it's someone elses

Depends on the children. Not sure why but I'd probably try and get home before midnight. I also ring a couple of times during the night out.

I'd leave them, but only if going fairly nearby. ARe they confident enough to phone you and ask you to come home?

How far away will you be? My friend did this recently with similar age children, but she was (literally) across the road.

I will be about 15-20 minutes away and could stay in touch by mobile. DS1 has been begging for me to stop making him go to babysitters for ages

I wouldn't. but they're not my children.

I don't understand people who suggest they could run to an amenable neighbour. Do you really want children running outside at 11pm?
And wouldn't the neighbour be likely to be in bed?

If you have to ask, then you're not confident. Is there really no-one else you can find?

I would do it :)

I babysat for other children at 13, however DSD is 12 and I wouldnt leave her till that late at night as I know she would be nervous: really depends on the child.

More info please Sticky - how far away will you be? More than 10 minutes? Do you have a kind neighbour? Do you have to stay until midnight? Do you have to leave as early as 7? DD's are about same age as yours, I left them for two hours last weekend but was only 5 minutes away, house was intact and they were in bed when I got back.

Well I WOULD check to see if our neighbour would be in first and ask what time they could be 'on call' too before going out nanny

its a no from me - even if you were across the road. you say there will be upset - can't be any where near the upset there would be if something happened to them. they are still children, not mini adults however much they behave that way.