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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to feel sad for the baby

85 replies

inspireme · 19/01/2012 21:07

Sil has a 6 month old baby as do I. I try not to see her much as I really don't agree with her parenting and I spend most of the time biting my tongue about some of the things she does regarding the babies safety and feeding like not strapping her into to buggy/carseat for example.

Had a conversation with her today and came away feeling very upset about the situation. Basically she has been feeding DN toddler milk for a while because the tubs are 2 quid cheaper on offer somewhere, not sure if that's really bad but I'm sure there's a reason why it's made for children over 12months.

She started weaning at 13 weeks so by now baby is well onto solids, I asked her what she eats in a day and the list is,
adult size bowl of porridge morning,
Petis filous yogurt (sp?) mid morning,
potato gravy butter salt afternoon time,
ambrosia custard pot evening,
another yogurt at bedtime, and crisps during the day,

She's never had fruit or vegetables yet apart from the
potato.

Now i know this isn't great, but I though well at least
she getting bottles, but her exact words were " she
doesn't really take bottles anymore" when I asked how
many ounces she takes she said 6oz in morn and 1 oz
before bed.

She has had numerous colds, ear infections and currently has bronchitis, not saying they are related but
maybe they are who knows.

I have previously posted about her and was told keep out so I have done so, but ffs it's getting hard when a
baby's health could be at risk.DH and I are getting worried, and really would love to say something but
know it will probably result in a fall out and he's very
close to his family.

Yes I know AIBU to be wearing judgey pants over someone else's parenting, but I need to rant and there's only so much DH can listen to when it's his Sis.

On iPhone so sorry in advance for spelling mistakes!

OP posts:
Heswall · 19/01/2012 23:33

inspireme Thu 19-Jan-12 23:27:54
Yeah I'm lying heswall

I think we can just leave it there.

Heatherhills · 19/01/2012 23:34

When there are 2 parents here why us the mother getting all the blame? She might be with the baby more but surely safety/diet are joint responsibilities?

inspireme · 19/01/2012 23:39

Just an example, today she asked me what milk my DS is on now, I told her and said what formula is your LO on now, as she was hungry baby milk for a while, when I said formula her face was like this Confused I said it again more of this Confused I then said "what milk?" then the penny dropped. Wish I was joking! Shock

OP posts:
solidgoldbrass · 20/01/2012 00:16

Are you sure she's not winding you up a bit? You sound terribly officious and if you make it as obvious to her as you are doing here that you think she's a spoilt thick chav she may well be having a bit of fun seeing just how much she can horrify you.

inspireme · 20/01/2012 00:28

There's a difference in having a conversation and being officious just because I ask a question.

I can assure you she's not having a bit of fun, and she's no where near a chav, dont know where you got that bit.

We all know she's a bit silly, but because she's spoilt she got away with it, it's common for her to ask some of us to ring and make appointments for her. What's even sillier is that some family members do it for her (mostly mil) instead of saying your 37 seriously can you not make a phone call.

How come on AIBU after receiving generally good advice the thread always defends to an attack on the op, I see it again and again.

OP posts:
inspireme · 20/01/2012 00:29

*decend's

OP posts:
AbbyAbsinthe · 20/01/2012 00:39

*descends Grin

inspireme · 20/01/2012 00:43

Aw crap time for bed been a long day Blush

OP posts:
bobbledunk · 20/01/2012 00:50

Some parenting is so awful that it is necessary to be judgmental. This woman is being extremely negligent and the child is paying the consequences with ill health. There is a huge risk to her health (and life) in the future if this continues.

She is endangering her child and if she refuses to listen to sense (don't bother with subtly) then maybe a visit from ss may encourage her to get off her lazy bum and take proper care of her dd.

This is child abuse, don't tiptoe around doing nothing while this baby suffers and faces lifelong health problems, possibly even death because her mother is to lazy to care.

crazymummy87 · 20/01/2012 09:40

YANBU she sounds like a idiot. Salt intake i can be serious and toddler milk isnt suitable the baby is eating too much. Sounds a bit like a few mothers i know totally clueless. Remember my dp telling one of my friends off on safety several times and he is very abrupt with his comments

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