Why are women so harsh to each other? Can we learn something from men?

[perfectshadeofgrey]

This is nothing new but it makes me kind of sad.
Why are women so cruel and unforgiving to one another? There was a thread here this week about a woman who called in sick because of period pain. The OP was outraged that should be a good enough reason. Wtf?! Do we have no sympathy for other women?
A couple of similar things happened at work this week so it got me thinking about this...
Can we learn from men do you think? I've never heard my DH to complain that someone at work called in sick or slag off other men.
So IABU to think that us women should bloody learn to stand by one another?

Ah yes, the gentle kindness of men. Why can't a woman be more like a man?

I am not too interested in the sisterhood solidarity on EVERY issue. I won't agree with someone just because they're the same gender as me. However I do think we could all use a little more, if not empathy, then acceptance that we all deal with things differently.

We're supposed to understand each other us women, but we often don't show much understanding. If a woman's birth experience was 'easy' she's sneered at for being smug, if her fellow woman struggled she's making a fuss. YANBU.

But men aren't all fluffy with each other either.

We are living in an age of sneer. Its not nice.

Wasn't there a thread very similar to this one a few days ago?

Aldi - completely agree

I don't think men are that nice to each other - at my dh's work they are always taking the piss out of each other and you would have to be practically dying to take a day off sick and not be called a 'woos' or worse.

I think women can learn a lot from men. Imagine how peaceful and loving the world would be with no more war, no murder or other violent crime.

It must be our hormones?

Yes men, so lovely with each other that they are overwhelmingly responsible as a gender for warfare, rape and violence towards each other (and women).

Women are harsh with words because that's the only power they were afforded for centuries because society (controlled by men) wouldn't let them have any other.

Even today, many women have learned that acceptance and success in wider society often involves behaving more like men, the flip-side of which is denigrating the typically or exclusively female. Hence the period pain issue. Divide and conquer and all that.

And I wonder how many MNers have had to cope with snide comments about PMT and hormones from various men at various points in their lives...

I like men as individuals. Some of them I prefer to some women I know. But historically men (en masse) have treated women (en masse) bloody terribly, despite individual exceptions, and it's still going on today albeit on a lesser scale. The few instances of women being 'bitchy' with each other really pale in comparison.

Agree, mitchier. There'd be no bullying, no dv, no assaults, no riots. Bloody women, so much to answer for.

'Ah yes, the gentle kindness of men. Why can't a woman be more like a man'

Some men can be kind and gentle. Some women aren't harsh to each other.

Kind of know what you mean OP. Women tend to use their mouth's but men tend to use their fists, I know which one I'd rather be

Why is this being turned into another man-bashing thread?

No shit, and some posters make absurd generalisations about an entire sex. Like the op.

Of course we should be kinder to each other but YABU and deluded if you think that we can learn this from men.

Glad you've got a nice DH though, I think nice people sort of rub off on you and encourage more niceness. Aldi has it with the 'age of sneer'.

where's the other man-bashing thread?

Would you prefer that it remained a woman bashing thread, Solpadeine? Posters are just pointing out how ludicrous the initial generalisations are and putting them into context.

I can't be arsed to sift through the many man-bashing threads to link for you Mitch, take a peruse yourself.

I don't think most posters are bashing men. We are just pointing out that its a ridiculous generalisation. Its like saying "lets all learn maths from chinese people" not all Chinese people are good at maths or teaching maths :)

It's a daft thread full stop.

Oh there is more than one?

Many.

I see your points. I'm not saying men are the gentle gender. I'm saying that in me experience I've met with women being bitchy about each other but not men.

Why can't a woman be more like a man?
Men are so honest, so thoroughly square;
Eternally noble, historic'ly fair;
Who, when you win, will always give your back a pat.
Well, why can't a woman be like that?

Why do you think that is Perfect? Do you not have positive friendships with women? Describe some of your 'bitchy' women experiences please so that I can see what you mean - maybe contrast with your positive men experiences.

I'm not being funny - I want to know.

If you think men are nice to each other all the time I suspect you haven't stood in a football crowd or in a pub and listened to nice gentle banter they chuck at each other

My experience of women is generally that they are kind and considerate to each other. I guess i just choose my friends carefully

I also don't think that women are obliged to be 'sisterly' if they genuinely beleive another woman is behaving like an arse.