Have namechanged because it's going to be pretty clear who I am.
Went to softplay this morning with my kids, dd4 and ds2. It's a preschool session so it's cheap and not very busy. It's a small family run place with an area round the back for toddlers/babies, a big area for 4+ and a separate trampoline area. Since most 5+ kids are in school, the big area is fine for the younger ones like my ds and the toddler area is full of really little crawling ones.
I usually sit on the seats between the big area and the trampolines so I can see my kids. It's usually a 1 or 2 hour session and there are a few regulars like me.
I'm rather unsociable happy to keep to myself, but some of the mums sit at a big table in front of the big soft play bit. They can see the big area and about half the trampoline area. They seem to go out for cigarettes in groups, leaving one mum at the table who I assume is responsible for the kids.
When I arrived, one of these Mums was outside with a little girl about 4 and a boy about 3, but only guessing. She was having a cigarette before going in. She sat with the big group of Mums and the kids went running in.
After a little while the boy came up to my table and asked me for one of the dc's breadsticks. I said no, as you never know if a kid has allergies etc and told him to go ask his mummy if he wanted a snack. He went off and I went back to watching my kids, the smell of him did linger and it was clear he had a dirty nappy. He came back a few minutes later saying "Mummy says it's okay if I can have one". I told him I didn't know his Mummy and he should ask her for a snack, the breadsticks belonged to my dc. He was pulling at his trousers and looked uncomfortable so I asked him if he'd had a poo, he said yes, so I told him to tell his Mummy he'd had a poo.
This time I watched him go to his Mum. She was chatting to some of the other mums and completely ignored him while he was jumping up and down and trying to speak to her. He started shouting at her, "Mummy Mummy I want you". Eventually she stood up and shouted at him, "I told you, you can have one if the lady says you can." At that point she glared at me then made a face at him and checked his nappy. So at this point I assumed she knew about his dirty nappy and she wanted me to give him a breadstick. She got up and went out for a cigarette by herself and the boy came over to me. I did just give him a breadstick as I felt sorry for him. He then asked me for a drink, I went to the cafe bit and asked for a cup of water for him. They gave him a sippy cup of water and I went back to my seat and watched my kids.
The next thing I saw was the boy running past me with nothing on his lower half, poo all over his bum and legs. The mother grabbed him, got his trousers and took him off to the toilets. A few minutes later they emerged with him dressed, she just sat back down at her seat and the boy went running off again. I could smell poo really strongly so I had a look over at the trampolines. It was all over 3 of the 6 trampolines (which are white). I told the kids who were on the other trampolines they should move away from the area until it was clean and then went and told the woman at the door, who was clearly the owner or manager.
She asked me who it was and I told her what I'd seen. She then went over to the Mum and started talking to her. The Mum got really angry and started shouting at the woman, another member of staff came over and it all got a bit heated. The woman wanted the Mum to pay a cleaning fine of £80, the mum said it wasn't her (fucking) child who made the mess and it could be cleaned with a couple of wipes. Anyway it all got rather nasty and loud. I would've left but the exit has to be released from behind the desk and the staff were both dealing with the woman.
Me and some other parents took their kids down the other end so they couldn't hear the swearing. The owner/manager woman came down and asked me again if I had seen the child taking off his nappy. I said I hadn't but I had seen him run past without a nappy on. She said they were going to close while they cleaned up and didn't know how long it was going to take. Since you pay when you leave, I paid and she was very appologetic. She said the woman had refused to pay and was getting aggressive so they asked her to leave and not come back unless she would pay the cleaning bill.
When I went out, the group of mums were all standing round the entrance. The woman had gone though. When I went past they all stared at me and made comments, bitch, etc...
I came home and have since told my dh, I was pretty judgmental, I said to him I thought she should pay the cleaning fine. It's a small business and it will cost them more than £80. He says I should've kept my mouth shut and either left or kept the kids away from the trampolines. He thinks it could've happened to anyone and I'm just being mean because the woman went out for a fag. I honestly couldn't care less if she was smoking or at the toilet, she was clearly neglecting her child's needs and wasn't watching him properly.
Dh thinks I'm mean and that maybe she can't afford to pay £80. I feel sorry for the womans kids, the kids who maybe stood in the poo and had to leave the softplay, not to mention the softplay owners.
So AIBU and a judgy meany? I don't think I am but I'm willing to be judged.