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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

RE: giving lifts?

131 replies

Davyveel · 11/01/2012 17:55

One of the senior teachers when I was at school recently died - i went to a small girl bording school and was 'invited' along with all other previous head girls (who were head girls when she was teaching) to go.

I decide that I would drive - it is easier to get there by car, means I have more flexibility and means that after funeral I can go visit some family who live relatively close to old school.

One of the women i went to school with goes to the same gym and was also head girl (3 yrs above me)

About a day after funeral was announced (it is this Saturday). I was at Gym waiting for DH and she came out. We got talking and asked each other how and when we were getting there.

I am going up this friday about 10 and so can have a rest (I am pregnant 8 mnth pregnant) before going to the old girls and staff and boards thing on the friday late afternoon/night (the schools remembrance for this teacher).

She said she was going by train and then asked if it was possible to give her a lift.
I said that i wouldn't be driving back as going to see family but of course i could give her a lift up.

She said that was fine and would be great, i said i would pick her up at 10 on friday. She said great and we left it.

Yesterday i got a text asking that as something had come up on Friday would it be possible to pick her up at half 10 instead?
Half hour i am not that bothered about so I said no problem.

She texted me today saying that would I mind picking her up after lunch instead about 1 o'clock?

When I said I could give her a lift I did tell her that i was leaving that early so could rest before evening thing (which I know will go on for a while)

AIBU to say to her that I plan to leave in the morning and unfortunately I am unable to give her a lift at that time ? When it is this Friday?

OP posts:
Geordieminx · 11/01/2012 22:19

The cheek of some people never ceases to amaze me.

It must be great to go through life not giving a fuck, taking liberties left right and centre without so much as a Blush

needanewname · 11/01/2012 22:27

Marking my place Grin

Cheeky mare. I'd be tempted to leave at 9.30, but then I am evil Grin

catchafallingstar · 11/01/2012 22:30

did she offer petrol money?

LovingChristmas · 11/01/2012 22:31
ifitsnotanarse · 11/01/2012 22:32

Davyveel is there any reply to the last text? Wonder if she's fuming at you not kowtowing to her every whim.

Would anyone like a Brew? I'm just going to put the kettle on.

Davyveel · 11/01/2012 22:34

Thank you all for your help - yep everything packed and playlist sorted.

shoulda well we went to a boarding school and a number of the girls came from this city and it is very common for people to move to this city ( esp from a school like mine)
And basically yes. I was getting changed to go in and she was getting changed to leave - I then heard a '(nn that only people from school use) ?' turn around and it was her (small school and she was head girl so knew who she was also both played hockey different teams but obviously knew each other)
She had just moved to area and we got talking, both ended up going at same time.

Yes it was awkward. My best friend ( and SIL) couldn't stop laughing when I told her - we went to school together - and both didn't really like her then

OP posts:
Spuddybean · 11/01/2012 22:35

she's probably saying to her DP how unreasonable you are being, as you are going that way anyway, and it's only a few hours later. That you are being precious as you could have a few mins to rest...grrr

Davyveel · 11/01/2012 22:39

Nope - didn't offer petrol money and no reply yet. Even if I don't get a reply now I do wonder what she will be like at the thing on Friday (and funeral to lesser exent) esp knowing the way she acted in school (she hasn't really changed a lot)

OP posts:
redwineformethanks · 11/01/2012 22:44

I'll stand alone and say I don't think she was BU to ask if you would consider going later, since she was only making the suggestion. However, you are entitled to leave when you like and if she prefers to travel later on her own, that's her choice.

HeartsTrumpDiamonds · 11/01/2012 22:45

Thank you OP for a truly satisfying read! Have not seen a 100% YANBU thread in a while. I love them.

I am sure you will look smashing in your party frock with your pregnancy glow on full beam (obv result of proper rest after long drive) and outshine her in every poss way.

ATruthUniversallyAcknowledged · 11/01/2012 22:53

Oh gosh, sorry, just remembered you're going to a funeral, and I waded in with my 'have a great time'. Um, have a good a time as it's possible to have?

Shutupanddrive · 12/01/2012 08:00

I bet she asks for a lift home when you get there!

Whatmeworry · 12/01/2012 08:40

Expect to get frozen at school gates now as you are No Longer Useful. Until you may be next time, of course....

Eglu · 12/01/2012 13:11

Well done op. You phrased the messages politely but firmly. Some people are so entitled.

SarahBumBarer · 12/01/2012 13:32

Er - YABU for even giving it a second thought as to whether YOU were being unreasonable! Glad you stood up to her.

DublinMammy · 12/01/2012 13:50

She sounds like a right self-centred arse. YANBU. Let us know if she is an arse at the funeral as well, Davy. Head girls often revert to this sort of entitlement when dealing with an old school girl (apologies to any non-arsey former head girls, you are a rare breed).

ViviPru · 12/01/2012 14:15

Some people! Shock

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe2726 · 12/01/2012 14:29

I went to a catholic school too, OP. This woman is so cheeky. A few minutes' rest indeed! Hmm

Whatever she texts now, just put, "I don't care, see you there"... Grin

peeriebear · 13/01/2012 19:20

I now want to know how it went with cheeky freeloader nonfriend!

MrsWembley · 13/01/2012 20:11

Oh, I saw this move up towards the top of my 'threads I'm on' and I thought, 'ooh, update!'

But no.Sad

GoingForGoalWeight · 13/01/2012 21:46

YANBU - the answer is NO, I've already stated my departure time and my reasons.

cookielove · 13/01/2012 22:30

Yes would love to know what happened, hopefully the OP will come back on and post and update

JaxTellerIsMyFriend · 14/01/2012 07:38

Hopefully you arrived safely and were able to rest before the evening function.

Was also hoping for update.

HippyHippopotamus · 14/01/2012 07:50

I too hoped there was an update! Come on OP!

DublinMammy · 14/01/2012 12:34

Please update us, OP!!!!

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