Bitchin online - again!

[scuzy]

so some may remember that i outed SIL to family as she was saying some horrible lies about us all online. I was wrong for doing that and should have spoke to her at the time. Since then we have talked and are doing fine. she apoligised as did I. however I have come across her again on the same forum (alot more incognito this time) doing the same thing again. I was not looking for her but searched a forum on a similar topic that she is passionate about and from reading i thought it was her. I did look at all her posts and it is her and couldnt believe she was saying the same things again.

anyways i havent told dp or anyone. should i just ignore it at this stage? carry on like i havent seen them?

genuine advice needed.

Or...maybe she's doing it to test you/wind you up OP. Be the bigger person and stay out of it. The messenger tends to get shot and you'll look like you have a vendetta.

Ca I just ask, kindly, how old are you OP?

If you're eleven tell your mum
If not, get a life

this thread is annoying, loads of people bailing in on the OP, not reading her responses and some just being mean.

Maybe there's something I'm missing, didn't read the last thread.

My sister in law told me on my fb wall that I was an interfering cow who should butt out of her life. That was her 'truth'

My truth was she had cheated, broke up her family, left 2 under 10s without a roof over their heads and I couldn't really butt out because I was providing shelter for her H and 2 kids on a spare room air bed I was v early pg and exhausted and upset about it all and would have targeted not being involved...
That was my 'truth'

If you and the family are not obviously identifiable because she's changed names/genders/relationships to 'protect the innocent', then I don't see a problem.

I post all sorts of random shit on here about people and my family. Sometimes it's fairly close to the truth, sometimes the message/implication is the same but the facts are completely different so that they won't be recognised.

But I'm well within my rights to complain and moan and bitch about people if it gets things off my chest and gets a bit of perspective without confronting the people directly.

I haven't read your other thread. Seemingly other people haven't either. If people are being unfairly harsh on you here, it might be worth summarising.

I wouldn't like to think someone was slagging me off online, but as long as they weren't naming/identifying me, I really couldn't care less!

I moan my own truth about certain un-named people all the time. OP You're doing the same thing that your SIL is doing, so you're both as bad as each other in that sense.

I'm sure her truth differs from yours.

YANBU for being upset, especially if you'd thought you'd all put the issue to bed, but YABU for being mad at her for doing exactly what you're doing (in regards to your op).

I would avoid that forum if its creating grief. We're probably all unjustly slated at times, but she hasn't named you so I would let it go.

i am 34

and i know its her from a photo she posted

sorry 31 trying to eat and read at same time

Last thread in a nutshell:

Op found SIL online and was annoyed. Printed all threads and saved in pc to prevent her from deleting things and so she had evidence.

Brought it all up in front of everyone and basically outed the SIL to whole family and put her In a terrible position. Hadn't spoke to SIL first and caused and stirred up all sorts of trouble.

If I remember correctly

touche Spike

Kayano nearly right. i did keep copies on hard drive but never produced them. i only told dp who told his brothers. BUT i did handle it all wrong and was embarrassed having read all those repsonses. i deleted those saved posts. and since then all has been fine we talked it out and laid it to rest. so i thought.

I remember your last thread, where you outed her to your DPs family right?

If I were SIl, and I had that kind of time, I might be tempted to see if I could smoke you out again. If so, mission accomplished.

If you're smart you'll ignore it.

yes I am going to ignore it. its not worth the grief. i know the truth and not going to let it upset me. havent told dp this time and not going to.

Wow, Kayano thanks for summary.

The thing is OP, there are as many sides to a story as there are people telling it. We all have our own perspective and, often, there are elements of truth in all of them.

I often end up acting as arbiter between my mum and brother's disputes and, I often completely believe both of them. Because they are both telling the same story, just from different positions and neither of them is wrong, per se.

What is the problem with her having a bit of a bitch online? It's better than there being build ups of frustration and constant confrontations. If it makes her happy, leave her to it.

aldiwhore has a point.

Exactly Spike.

A bit of a bitch?

I must be reading a different thread!

I understand 'having a bit of a bitch', I do, honestly. I do it myself

But claiming that your sil caused her own miscarriage, saying your brother is an alcoholic, accusing people of committing benefit fraud, saying your children are being hit...

That isn't a bit of a bitch. It truly isn't the same thing as saying ooh, Xs hair looks a right state/hasn't Y slammed the pounds on / god, if I have to hear one more word about Zs new bloke, I'm going to throw up...

It is so far passed bitching! It's into delusional!

But is he'd written "my best friend didn't support me when I lost my job and nagged me until I wouldn't meet him for a drink down the pub and I found a drinking partner at a different pub" (we'll leave the sex bit out ) then would the wife immediately recognise herself?

Op says identities were changed, so she must be recognising herself in the stories so they can't be complete lies can they?

past? passed?

But they are the same stories that have been told before, and there is an identifying picture.

I'm no sherlock holmes, but I think even I'd be able to figure that out!