Expecting that a 7 year old could make a simple meal?

[bigbarnfarmer]

I would like my kids to start taking more responsibility, they totally take for granted all i do, like most their age i imagine. However given they are getting older i want to help them become more responsible and more independant.

My 7 year old enjoys food, like sto help in the kitchen and has been making cups of tea for a while now. I was thinking tomorrow i might let him prepare a simple meal, with minimal supervision.

AIBU? and does anyone who thinks its fair enough have any simple meal suggestions.

Blimey, at eight I was making toffee with boiling hot sugar syrup, fry-ups, baking, all manner of things, would quite happily beaver away in the kitchen for hours with no supervision, I cooked with my mother from a very young age & DD who is three is allowed to peel veg, grate cheese, chop fruit etc.

I'm sure, by the age of seven she'll be making tea & using the oven as long as she's tall & strong enough.

DS sadly & rather typically, shows no interest...

OP how about carbonara or sausages & mash? (with you on hand to help draining the spuds or pasta) both pretty easy in terms of prep & will give him a great deal of satisfaction at creating a 'proper' meal.

oh yes that's true re carbonara. mine like making pasta with bacon, cream and peas because it's done in a few minutes.

I think it's great when kids are encouraged into the kitchen from as young an age as possible. Of course it's all about fun and being safe, no parent is going to put their child at risk.

I don't understand why mothers who think that they've done a marvellous job parenting when their children go to university, unable to fend for themselves, feel the need to criticise others?

Actually, now I think about it, my mum went back to work in the evenings when I was 9 and I used to prepare and cook a meal for my dad, on my own, which would be ready for him when he got home at six o'clock. It was nothing exciting, just something like sausages with vegetables and usually mashed potatoes but nobody batted an eyelid that I could do it alone.

I also made my own breakfast and a cup of tea before school when I was six (I walked myself to school at that age too!)

I agree about kettles being dangerous until children are physically stronger than an average seven year old.

My dd (8) is too nervous around hot things, so would be a liability in the kitchen & anyway, I really feel that 7/8 is far too young to cook. She can prepare her self toast, cereal or a sandwich but that is all she needs to be doing.

As for helping, she will happily set/clear the table, scrape plates. She loves to dry up & put stuff away. I agree that helping a little is good at this age, but it is mine & her father's job to cook dinners/hot food.

I wouldn't let her make toasted sandwiches as our sandwich press gets VERY hot, as do most, I expect.

I agree with squeaky and the other posters who've said that the height of a child (with stool or standing) is really relevant. Also general confidence and ability to take instructions and follow them without playing the fool.

I think you're never too young to learn anything, really.

my memory's crap but i'm pretty sure DD was starting to make meals about age 7. she started with food prep when she was 3-4 (helping to bake, chopping fruit for fruit salad, etc). i would have said that it's just the past couple of years (she's 11 now) that she's been allowed to drain a pot of pasta or potatoes though, full kettle was probably from about 8.

wow! I am a bit shocked by this thread

my 6 year old makes cups of tea and hot chocolate- you just teach them not to overfill it so it ISNT too heavy for them.

Beans on toast, omlettes, pancakes, spag bog...they love it. Of course you dont leave them unsupervised, just be doing something else near them

I suppose it depends on how you were raised yourself and the community you live amongst?

ok..height...my dd is very tall (10 year old tall) maybe thats it

OT but do kids still do cookery at secondary school these days?

Safety - your child is far safer if supervised and taught about the risks in the home properly by yourself rather than wrapped in cotton wool and never exposed to danger at all. Use your common sense re heat/sharp knives/heavy pots etc as every kid matures at a different rate.

Cooking (supervised) helps with all kinds of skills from reading/maths/hand-eye co-ordination/social skills in a way that DS finds lots of fun. The fun element is really important as he struggles so hard in school at times. Does it matter if "reading practiice" is a recipe rather than a story for an asd kid? Or is it more important that he spends 1/2 an hour reading enthusiatically to choose the recipe he'd like to try?

With the emphasis on "healthy eating" and kids weight at school, more children than ever before are developng serious eating disorders very young. ASD kids are known for having very limited diets but I can think of several of his NT friends (esp the girls) who would fret less about their weight if they were more directly involved in food prep at home. These are 7-8 year olds!

It's a great way of introducing new variety to children's diets and I've noticed anecdotally that those kids who cook at home are far less "fussy" eaters generally.

DS can tell you if the meal contains protein, calcium, vit c, carbohydrate etc and is balanced. As he gets older he gets more involved in meal plannng and grocery shopping. Online shopping is great for his maths skills as we can sit and discuss food choices for the week.

Meal planning and budgeting are crucial life skills and again the excercise pleases his school teacher as he has to read and use maths. At the moment he's looking at the price per kg and comparing pack sizes to find the best deal. It's great for primary aged maths but too simplistic compared to the NC to have the same educational value for a secondary child.

Lots of children without find school work more interesting if you can apply it to the real world in some way (not everyone has a philosophers temperment!). This is something even the poorest sngle Mum can do to help her child that actually cos of numbers and the constraints of the classroom environment is much harder for schools to implement.

I've met too many "academic" familes whose kids are serously lacking in life skills at Uni. I also think parents forget the "cute" stage is very brief and that actually our kids could choose to rebel and legally leave home and have their own kids at 16. Not all Mums get the amount of time they expect to prep their kids for the "real world". Parenting is all about getting our kids ready to live independently without us. (This is something I think sadly sen parents are more aware of than the those without disabilties sadly.)

My six year old can do her own toast and make sandwiches, nothing that involves a sharp knife though I do let her use the grater (with caution, instructions about keeping fingers well out of the way). I would never let her near the kettle. I sometimes allow her to put things in the pan/stir things on the stove but only when I am next to her.

In fact I was trying to remember the other day when I first made a proper cup of tea. I think I must have been nine. They must be tall enough & strong to be able to lift the kettle steadily. I did ironing from about twelve.

As someone who works with children & food I think it's a very good idea indeed to let them get involved with cookery and food preparation but only to the extent that it is age appropriate. Think Katy I Can Cook.

i'm not so bothered about the sharp knife thing, they can only cut themselves, it's not like they're going to stab themselves in the guts. the three year old is delighted that she can now peel carrots (with a peeler) without resorting to a sticking plaster. now that's progress...

good post bochead

Interesting thoughts about SEN - my dd is. Maybe we concentrate more on practical stuff?

totally agree re: fussy eaters, bochead. dd2 (funnily enough not ASD dd1 - she is in a good place with eating atm, and will happily try new foods) is really quite fussy.

the best ways we have found ot combat this are growing our own veggies and cooking. she grew and tasted: peas, potatoes, peppers, carrots and broccoli this year. peas peppers and broccoli are yet to become regulars, but she tasted them, and quite liked them raw. carrots and potatoes we have seen a huge increase in the amounts she will eat, stemming from the excitement of picking, washing, chopping and then cooking and eating something she made from (literal) start to finish.

now when she says "I don't like peas" we can remind her of the time when she loved the peas fresh from the pod - she amends it to "I like fresh peas from the garden" - a good start, imo.

Mine too, Aitch, the speed peeler is her new best friend in the kitchen.

I think I may be projecting re the hot water thing, I'm a klutz who regularly burns herself pouring tea, draining pans etc. I think I assume dd with be the same. Lets hope she takes after her dad in that respect.

I wouldn't let my 7yr old use the kettle, as he gets easily distracted, but I reckon that depends on what your child's like. He chops fruit/ veg, peels, grates, cooks toast/ crumpets, pours cold drinks, etc and has done since he was tiny. He'd be outraged if anyone stopped him. Am a bit amazed that people don't let their kids do such things. I just thought it was normal.

Did you really say that your children take you for granted? At 7, 5 and 3, what would you be expecting from them.

Taking for granted is what husbands or wives or adult children do, not actual chldren.

"My dh was never shown how to cook when he was a child and so really struggles in the cooking dept, i was and i love cooking. My children so far are showing an interest so why not."

There's your real problem. Sounds like he needs a few lessons in front of the cooker.

aitch the ' omg boiling water' thing - is a snidey comment in itself .
Parents who don't let their DC use boiling water or sharp knives have made their own risk assessment .
That's too be respected not mocked .

It doesn't mean that they don't help their children to acquire life skills.
Mine use knives but I wouldn't let them near boiling water.
Go and see the results in children's A and E and then scoff about boiling water.
When my DC are tall enough to use a kettle they will do but not while they are 6.
Thunder I agree with you .

Can see both sides of the argument here. I was of the mollycoddling school which, tbh, I think was just as much about my own desire to get things done quickly (cooking family meals in 30 mins after work rather than taking twice as long to involve DS) as it was about protecting him...

But had repeated wake up calls when he would come back from school home ec/cubs/scouts/cadet camp etc with tales of what he'd done, and was forced to realise he was an awful lot more grown up and competent than I gave him credit for.

Why are people so impolite on this forum?

nannyplumismymum i would be interested to see how many of the children in A and E with burns have aquired them in the kitchen whilst they make a meal, having been taught about safety and deemed sensible enough to prepare a simple meal by a responsible parent. I can tell you- not many.

lunaticow :)

I often ask myself the same...guess it's that anonymity gives certain individuals permission to unleash their inner catty mentaloid. Because I really cannot see this amount of people talking and behaving this way in RL without it being headline news every night!

Boiling water/hot oil etc is dangerous. The natural instinct when something hot touches your skin is to get away from it.

As an adult if you're draining a pan or pouring a kettle and you get splashed you put the thing down before putting the skin under cold water. As a child, the instinct is still to respond to the burn straight away and drop what they're holding, which can lead to the hot liquid splashing all over their legs or arms. Scald burns are horrible.

I agree with portofino at the beginning of this thread.

My dd1 is 7 and not tall enough to handle a kettle of water unsupervised. She can make sandwiches; peel vegetables and stir cake mixes; but she would need a stool to stand up on to use the stove and she is only allowed to do that under close supervision.