just phoned benefit fraud line to report my son's friend's mum.

[foogle]

I have sat on the info for ages and didn't do anything except get angrier and angrier.

For christmas son's friend got a pony, bmx bike, x box, ipod and family ski trip.

My son got a second hand lego set as that is all we could afford this year.

Son's friend gets free school meals and all school trips paid for.

We can't afford school dinners and scrimp and save for son to go on school trips.

Son's friend's dad lives with them and works but I know she claims benefits as a single mum.

She earns £25 an hour cash in hand at a racing stables.

She gets everything paid for, including housing benefit etc.

We can't afford ponies nor lessons yet she has 2 competition horses.

I never thought I 'd do this as she's a nice person but I've had enough.

Oh I see. I hate people with a sense of entitlement.

People who inherit wealth, have the best education and contacts that money can buy and the luxury of pursuing their lucrative careers while withdrawing all support for the vulnerable for example. Cunts.

A kitchen horse is probably more of an essential purchase than a fridge. It isn't that cold for January but food won't spoil if kept outside. Away from the horse, obviously.

If you read my post, I included the whole of society, from the top

Fair enough, SirSugar - I agree

You are wrong about council housing however. House prices and rentals are massively inflated. Council and housing association tenants who are being charged a fair rent usually work. And spend their own money improving their properties even though they will never own them and have no long-term security, no equity and no assets to pass on or to fund their old-age.

It's very strange but since I started reading Mumsnet in 2005 there has been a massive shift in attitudes towards social housing. These days people are far less sneery (remember the thread about Barrett Homes?) and are actively jealous (envious?) of people in this position. Something to do with the recession I suspect

I had to sell my house when my first marriage broke up in 2001 and made a 50% profit. I had descended into penury by the interest rates during those years but it was still an obscene amount for something I had only owned for six years.

Many people believe council housing is exclusively for those on benefits!

It so isn't!

Yes, lots of posters over the years assuming that social housing is completely free, working or not

Some of them have no knowledge of life outside their experience and are happy to learn. I love these people. I often vacillate on threads and look like a fence-sitting knobber but opinions are shifting entities and I'm always impressed by people who have had a far superior education than I have who are willing to do the same.

I didn't even know about certain things and I am as working-class as they come. When I had to kick XH into touch for drug-taking and violence when DD was a baby (started in pregnancy and the extent of the drug problem hidden until then) I didn't even know that I was allowed to claim benefits if I wanted to because I had a degree and a job.

I love how the OP is now rhapsodising about how she turned in the woman because it was the right thing to do, when in her initial post, she made it clear that she's known about it for ages, but did nothing. The thing that pushed her over the edge to report it was her jealousy over the other boy's Christmas presents that he mentioned on his fb account. (still trying to figure out why she's scoping out some child's fb account? )

and benefit class? where there's smoke there's fire?

What a load of rubbish!

No smoke without fire.
Rubbish. I have been reported. We were doing nothing wrong.

Yes things don't always look as they seem.

We received some benefits for a while after DS was born. I wondered whether a couple people we knew might think we were cheats because DS had a lot of nice things, we had expensive food in the kitchen, and had holidays to France. Of course, if they had asked, they would have found that all the nice things were hand-me-downs from my rich cousin, the expensive food was overstock given to DH from his minimum wage job, and the holidays were to family so cost virtually nothing.

You might say that in that case we would have had nothing to worry about if we'd been reported. Except that they often suspend benefits while you're being investigated, which may have left us unable to pay the rent.

Especially if there are children involved, I don't think you should report unless you are 100% sure. The OP claims to be but she has already been shown to be wrong about her friend's income and won't give any details for anything else, so I'm pretty sceptical.

We both work but we live on top up benefits due to OH's inablity to work full time hours and my caring responsiblities (and the fact that the job that I was able to get was only very part time. I would be mad to leave it as the rate of pay is good).

We have lots of 'nice' things.

I say 'nice' because they are nice to me but not exactly top grade stuff.

We bought most of it when we were in full time work/didnt have disablity/sick child/child with a disablity and looked after it.
We were also lucky enough to have a makeover so have some bits of stuff that we wouldnt have been able to buy ourselves.
We have a new car because OH uses his DLA to pay for it.
They DCs are always well dressed because I buy in the sales and look after their stuff so I can pass it down.
The have lots of toys because I get up at 5.30am to go to the halfprice Sainsburys toy sale at Christmas and use my nectar points.

I suspect what would make people like the op a bit about us being legit is that we do not moan about being poor all the time, we dont dress in sackcloth and I dont push my OH about in a rickity wheelchair with an apolgetic look on my face.

We are normal people who have had things happen. We do not discuss our finances with all and sundry (I am AMAZED at the how thread starters know so much about other' s lives)
We refuse to bow to the expectations of those who want people on low incomes and who are disabled to look like their lives are worse than theirs.
Why should we look downtrodden and act ever so 'umble so 'the hard working decent taxpayers' approve of our lifestyle?

We are in our mid 40s and have been subsidising other for over half a century between us. All those graduates looking down on us now, how would they react to us demanding an audit of their university years so we can check we got value for our money?

I think, MrsDeVere that you've hit the nail on the head. People expect the poor to be "downtrodden" and apologetic, rather than normal people who actually have nice things, most likely because they bought them prior to landing in poor circumstances. I'm sure if people were looking at DH & I, they would raise eyebrows as well - we have a nice car, DSs got nice Christmas presents, we have a Wii console, I don't work - I'm sure there are some that are mentally calculating DH's income and trying to add it all up.

I can't help but wonder why? What kind of person mentally tallies up what their friends spend and tries to figure out if they are on benefits and whether or not they are taking the piss? I know a couple people who are on benefits, mainly because they have mentioned it simply in passing. I certainly don't know what they are claiming, nor do I police their spending habits. It's not my business. Just like they don't analyse our spending. I resent the idea that because we're less wealthy and receive some benefits, that we're accountable to everyone what we spend it on.

"Benefit class"

Glad I am not friends with the OP, and not because she'd have anything to shop me for either

Excellent post, MrsDevere

Similarly, I have a close female relative who is legitimately claiming benefits. Her kids are always well turned out because of canny use of Ebay/sales, they are treated well for birthdays/Christmas-they don't go short of the latest toys-again, EBay/half price supermarket sales/Charity shops. She is able to have the occasional weekend away/beauty treatment-again courtesy of Groupon/KGB deals. She sometimes "robs Peter to pay Paul" but on the whole, manages what little income she has coming in, well. Parents are dead, so no indulgent GP's and no maintainence from DC's father

Do I begrudge her or her kids any of this? Do I heck. And I would hate to think that there are "haters" out there "totting up" what she's seems to have, and coming to the conclusion that there must be fiddling going on.

You sound like a good friend delicious.
Recognising the hard work your mate puts into having a nice life and not begrudging her.

Jeeez I have even seen threads raging that people on low incomes get subsidized OU courses. How DARE they try and better their lives . Oh the irony of these rantings coming from people who enjoyed the benefits of a heavily subbed university education (including money from mummy and daddy)

What is wrong with people?

I am not sure if I find it amusing or annpying that there are people out there that think social housing is some sort of freebie

and MrsDeVere there have really been threads complaining about people on low incomes getting subsidised OU courses ???

Yes.
They, like most of these threads, start with a statement of fact that is untrue.

'Its not fair that only people on benefits can get free OU courses'

This is not true and the threashold for grants is actually pretty high. Well I think its high but if you earned 150k you would think it measly.

One on Netmums went on for pages and pages based on the OP lying her bloody head off and telling everyone 'my FIL gets it all for free but guess what? When I phoned up they told me because I wasnt on handouts I get ZILCH!'

Of course it didnt matter that posters corrected this information and gave example of why it wasnt true, people WANTED to belive it so they did.

so sad to be jealous about someone trying to better themselves

It's a bit ridiculous. Not happy with them living on benefits, but not happy when they try to better themselves either.

so you have reported her because you are jealous that she apparently has a pony?

You know, when we start turning against each other like this I have the tendency to hope that she dousnt get caught.

Im not sure what i dislike more to be honest

I wouldn't blame OP for reporting suspected benefit fraud, but I do fault her for announcing (dedicated thread and all) the fact on MN. I don't see why it should or needed to be shared here unless it's a personal vendetta thingie.

foogle instead of being jealous and bitter about other people why dont you do something to improve your own life. you come over as very bitter i dont think it makes any difference about your friends situation. you seem to be the type who will always be jealous and bitter about someone. i know people like you who can never be happy as they are to busy wasting their engery on being negative , bitter and jealous. foogle tell me by reporting your friend how has it improved your life.
very sad

Erm........ this thread is 3 months old [buconfused]

What Bloodymary said. Though it would be interesting to know if anything came out of OP reporting her son's friend's Mum.

Zooooombie thread! Leave it...the OPs gone

wonder what happened?

This is my first post on here and I must say "What nice people you all are!" I don't applaud Benefit Fraud but equally I have little respect for nosey busybodies who have nothing better to do than bring drama into their lives by snitching on friends, neighbours etc. This form of action does not help your own lives.. I feel sorry for many of you who are so self-righteous and sit in judgement of others. I'm a woman myself, yet sadly so many of my own gender are poisonous. We don't know the circumstances WHY some people commit fraud, but it's not for us to be judemental. My message to all of you is "to get on with your own lives".