just phoned benefit fraud line to report my son's friend's mum.

[foogle]

I have sat on the info for ages and didn't do anything except get angrier and angrier.

For christmas son's friend got a pony, bmx bike, x box, ipod and family ski trip.

My son got a second hand lego set as that is all we could afford this year.

Son's friend gets free school meals and all school trips paid for.

We can't afford school dinners and scrimp and save for son to go on school trips.

Son's friend's dad lives with them and works but I know she claims benefits as a single mum.

She earns £25 an hour cash in hand at a racing stables.

She gets everything paid for, including housing benefit etc.

We can't afford ponies nor lessons yet she has 2 competition horses.

I never thought I 'd do this as she's a nice person but I've had enough.

Something unpleasant about a grass

Imagine if this applied to other parts of life... Like a murder for example. Maybe the Lawrence family
Could have just been spared 18 years of anguish and waiting if this wasn't the damn culture of this country.

If you suspect crime or know something, report it, no matter how small.

(disclaimer: I am not comparing benefits and fraud to murder here, just annoyed about the 'no grassing cultue')

nursenic, yes u have a point, a good one about the children suffering, once papers get hold etc.

too easy to say, "the mum should have thought of that before she started her scam''

however, if she is guilty, she knew what she was doing, she should pay the consequences no?

i do agree with u about the children suffering..........think its sad that there are so many of us who seem to care more about other peoples chidren than their own parents...............

Well, there will always be those of us who do care about other people's children to the point of worrying about what will happen to them when their parents are paraded through local newspapers.

I have stuck my head above the parapet, especially with regard to reporting poor nursing care (in my profession). And that included a nurse who was stealing so I have done this but not anonymously.

However i do not like these anonymous benefit reporting lines-too many cases of malicious and semi inaccurate reporting. And this OP was motivated by less than noble motives in my opinion-jealousy, resentment and saying she will confess after the deed-well......

I understand the whole ethics around not reporting crime. But having facts totally correct and making sure one is motivated by the right reasons is surely important too?

I know someone who runs a stables for nothing so that she can keep her horses there and so they get fed. I also know someone who does unpaid secretarial work so she can keep her horses on her 'bosses' land. I think horsey ladies are often not paid in order to look after their horses. i can't be the only personw ho knows people like this.

If I was mean I'd phone the school and tell them her child should not be having free school trips but I won't do that. Lol about the unpleasant grass!

I am not the sort of person who would shield someone who is blatantly breaking the law with some thing serious like this, shame on you if you would.

Sometimes I can afford to give my son a riding lesson so was browsing the website and discovered that it costs as much to stable a horse as to rent a flat. I am considering moving in

The free school meals doesn't sound right if the person's OH has a good job. Unlikely they would earn less than £16k between them.

Then again I have never reported someone and probably never will unless a vulnerable person was at risk or a serious crime committed. I've thought about it, yes, and even posted about it but - all this - it's so divisive.

My husband and I both work and we earn under 16k.

Actually.

Parents do not have to pay for school lunches if they receive any of the following:

* Income Support
* income-based Jobseeker's Allowance
* income-related Employment and Support Allowance
* support under Part VI of the Immigration and Asylum Act 1999
* the Guarantee element of State Pension Credit
* <strong>Child Tax Credit, provided they are not entitled to Working Tax Credit and have an annual income (as assessed by HM Revenue & Customs) that does not exceed £16,190</strong>

For people on IS/JSA/ESA it's straight forward.

You have to work over 16 hours(it might be 30 hours for a couple) to be eligible for WTC. So someone working a few hours a week, would still get CTC but not WTC. If they declare this it comes off their JSA/IS.

" dont worry kids will b fine, most kids dont go horse riding
and having less toys, no prob"

What a lovely cavalier attitude to have towards complete disruption of a child's life. Utterly appalling.

I find it very telling that the OP is forthcoming on some information, but on definitive information she is vague or "cannot give the information". What she's said already would out the person anyway. I'd say the OP doesn't have nearly the level of factual information to determine what's really going on. She seems to be motivated strictly by jealousy.

Again, a simple case of the OP needing a hobby...

How were you planning on explaining this to your son op? Just wondering.

Will you be helping him to find a new friend?

So ops son will be the one to suffer now? Ops son can no longer be friends with the other boy

it isn't nice to be a grass but sometimes it has to be done. I went for an internal interview and was asked about what I would do if another colleague was doing something wrong in the workplace.

I said I might talk to him/her about the matter. This was the wrong answer, you are meant to report them. I told the chap interviewing me afterwards that I was not a grass and didn't believe in reporting people but this seems to be the culture in the workplace.

I do think though that the benefit thing is different because the woman is stealing from the tax payer as far as I am concerned and making less money available to people who genuine need the support.

Foogle.... So you would want the child to go hungry in school??! Seriously, you would want them to stop feeding him?

Argh I hate the 'don't grass' mentality!!!

Grass grass grass! ESP if you think someone may be doin something wrong. I can't believe you told and interviewer 'I'm no grass.'

What? So bad behaviour and bad practice is always to be ignored?

I told the chap after the interview when he was giving me feedback. He was a colleague and he agreed with me but you have to tow the line officially. I think it is better if you could give the person a chance to sort the problem out first.

Of course bad behaviour shouldn't be ignored but sometimes it could have terrible repercussions for the person if say they lost their job as a result of this. Maybe a friendly word may have prevented a bad situation escalate.

I think the scenario may have been that the person had been drinking

Whistle blowers can endure terrible repercussions too. The so-called NHS/nursing protection for WB's is not worth the paper it's written upon. I don't think I'll ever be free of the psychological consequences. i still have weekly nightmares and it's been nearly twelve years.

You get MNers who wouldn't report child neglect/abuse out of loyalty to their friend, I've seen the posts, and now it seems it is fine with some MNers to know of serious crime and not want to report it because it is somehow unpleasant to be a grass.

What a world we live in, some people are very sheeplike if they don't want to stand up for what they know is right. I suppose it explains why some people would rather walk on by than get help for someone in trouble.

I am a hard working tax payer and I used to be dependent on benefits myself when I was badly injured once so I am really glad they exist. Many posters here who have a hard time understanding how I know it is fraud are right to be indignant as you don't know the details and I can't give them. Also I have known many people on benefits but this is the only one who is blatantly taking the p... it is the first time I have ever called, anybody else out there done the same? (I don't mean malicious calling as this is a genuine case).

Its broken Britain...

I'm debating about it foogle and I def would but I don't know of it is still goin on 100%

I know that it has in the past because the person actually told me they had done it in the past

But there you are, being so uppity, and righteous, and tax payer-ish................so why has it taken YOU so long to report it hm?!

lol @ Tax payer-ish

'I have sat on the info for ages'

Yeah right!!

I love the taxpayer outrage on these threads

anyway foogle, you never told me if she has a big fuck off TV?

Just because I am uncomfortable with reporting benefit fraud in this way does not mean that I would not report child abuse/neglect - totally different ball game. Likewise I would not walk past someone in trouble who needed help.

Usualsuspect plasma tv, broken britain...have we had sense of entitlement yet?

I had to be 100% sure first

She isn't 'benefit' class so doubt she bothers with tvs with all the show jumping competitions she goes to... will be flamed for this one but trying to answer the question.