Not to be worried that son is sick, but worried about job

[lisaleelu]

Oh I have just felt my stomach heave at the thought of having to call work and tell them I need time off coz my 3 year son is sick. He has just come out in spots and clearly has chicken pox. I feel like a bad mum became I am not really bothered he is ill. I know I should be but I just feel sick myself at the reaction from work. I was off for one day last june coz my 1 year old was sick and they were so horrible.

It says on the the web that you cant send them to nursery until the spots crust over and that could be a week. OMG work will have a fit.

I have absolutely no-one else to mind him and then if the baby gets it that could be longer. DH could have some time off but he has already had a week of just last week as his mum was really sick.

I feel so stressed.

Chicken pox is generally not serious so I don't think I would be too worried either if my DS got it. It sounds like you're really overwhelmed with work. Could you and your DH share the time off?

Get DH to take the first half, and you tell work that you will have to take the second half of the time off. If you tell them in advance and plan for it, perhaps they won't throw such a fit?

I feel for you love

What do you do? Any chance of doing any of it from home?

Don't you keep leave back for if the dcs are ill?

I am a teacher. So can't work from home.

Financial implications too - you'll have your pay docked.

It's a bugger when you have no other child care.

Dh will take some of the time i expect BUT he is in a similar position especially as off last week due to his mum.

I'm in a similar situation at the mo, though not because my DS is ill. My Mum usually has him on the days he doesn't go to nursery but she can't do it for the next month or so - family issues. I'm lucky in that work have agreed I can re-jig some shifts around DH, but on the days I can't, I'm having to use leave. Not ideal but what else can I do?

I guess it's just something you'll have to suck up. They might get stressy because of the short notice but it is your holiday to use isn't it?

Unfortunatly thats what comes with being a parent. Part of me just thinks "think yourself lucky you have only needed one day since june".

PP idea of getting your DH to do the first half of the week if possible makes sense, but otherwise work will just have to get on with it. Send your plans in via email as soon as possible for whoever covers.

Well on the positive as a teacher should not get pay docked.

When I read your OP I immediately thought you were a teacher. It's one of the huge downsides of teaching that taking time off outside of normal holiday time is really difficult. Plus I know some headteachers can be horrible about having to bring a supply teacher in. Unfortunately there's nothing much you can do, DS needs looking after so school will just have to deal with it.

Really? They dock in our borough for general child sick leave.. Ditto funerals (child/spouse/parents excepted)

Exceptional circumstances, paid by HT discretion.

I know Dh what you mean about onely one day since june. DHhas been off twice when they have been sent home sick from nursery - but the people just assume that you have parents that can help out as they do. But neither dh or my parents are able to help.

You are legally allowed to take time off when your children are unwell but it's usually a day or two until you can make alternative arrangements. He needs to stay inside until all of the spots have 'scabbed' over, which could take 7-10 days. It's very hard. I'm a single parent and have lost jobs because there has been no one else to care for ds when he's been unwell.

Why not?

Emergency leave to cover child care is, unless your employer is fabulous, unpaid and you certainly can't use up your holiday allowance as I imagine you don't have one due the school holidays being fixed (unless you work in a very strange school).

www.direct.gov.uk/en/Employment/Employees/Timeoffandholidays/DG_10026555

No I think you get 3 days a year compassionate leave. Although if you dare to take it they are no very compassionate on you returnn to work!

There should be a school policy to cover this as it is only to be expected.
So they have no business being horrible.
Are you primary or secondary?
E-mail in your planning and anything else they need.

Have you got any friends who can help out?

I work shifts so often have random days off in the week. In fact I'm having my friends son tomorrow as the schools are still off and I'm not working whereas his parents are. I've also had his 2 yo sister when she has been ill.

The problem is that there is just no alternative but dh and I. We have friends but they all work too- if nursery wont take them there is nothing at all i can do but stay off,

You could get an emergency nanny in, they have normally had chicken pox!

If you are a teacher then there are policies in place that allow you to have both paid and unpaid leave to cover child sickness. It will be fine.

If there is bad feeling it will be school specific. Have worked in several schools and never had an issue.

Just to say that I'm a teacher and we do get pay docked so check that carefully. We aren't allowed to have paid time off for common children's illnesses eg colds/chicken pox. If it's something more serious, ie the child is very ill and requires a hospital stay-the decision goes to the governors for compassionate leave.

Unfortunately, you'll just have to take the time off but most likely have it as unpaid.

I'm a teacher so I sympathise. What annoys people in our dept is that it's always the mums who take the time off, never the dads. I think if you can split the time with DH then you will get a better reaction from your colleagues.

You can get 'emergency' nannies (try a local care agency) but it would likely be ££££s. What a nightmare