Bit long but will try and condense.
We live in one of a row of terraced houses where the neighbours all get on well and where many of the garden fences have been taken dwon to allow the children who live here more space and to have shared vegetable patch etc.
Our next door neighbours for 5 years have been a gay couple who we have become very good friends with, they are similar ages and outlook/sense of humour/interests to us, we go to the pub together, we have film nights, they babysit our DCs, and so on. Over New Year they had friends to stay, as did we, and there was a bit of a joint party.
Anyway since then we have noticed them being rather off with us, then yesterday afternoon they came round and said they were very offended by something our 7yo DD had said. Apparently on NYE she was talking to them when they told her she had to come home now as their friends were due to arrive, and DD said "Oh yes your 'bian' friends are coming aren't they". They then asked her to repeat what she said, so she did, and when they asked where she heard that she told them she had just heard 'somebody' say it and wouldn't say any more.
They are now accusing DP of calling their friends (and therefore them) 'bians' which they say is a highly offensive shortening of 'lesbians', they say they are furious as their sexuality is not a shameful secret and that it deserves its full name and that they are not just 'lesbians' they are people with names. They think DP has said this because they had a slight disagreement with him earlier on NYE (sorted out and forgotton by the evening) about their friends bringing a dog (which has previously been a right PITA when here) and so they now think he used homophobic language about them in anger.
DP says he didn't say it, and I believe him. He can be quite sweary when annoyed, and does mouth off a bit to me sometimes when people have pissed him off, but he is absolutely NOT homophobic and I have never ever heard him (or anyone else for that matter) use 'bians' as a derogatory term anyway.
I did ask DD about it, but she insisted she had just heard 'someone' say it and wouldn't say anymore, and I don't want to make a massive deal out of it to her. She wouldn't have known it was going to offend them - their sexuality isn't commented on by us at home, though she does know what the word 'lesbian' means as I explained it to her and told her it was not a bad thing by any means after she heard it at school last year.
WWYD? What would you think of the whole thing? DP is livid they would even think it of him to be homophobic, I am bemused by how badly they have taken a child's comment but obviously don't want to ignore their clear hurt and anger over it.