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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Two cold potatoes and nothing else...AIBU?

70 replies

TheCokeMachine · 30/12/2011 21:56

We have a 9 week old baby, I've been out three times alone since she was born, once for a night with friends, once for a haircut and today to meet a friend at her place for a couple of hours this evening.

I normally do all housework, baby stuff, pet stuff, shopping and everything - I also contribute half to all of the household outgoings despite being on maternity leave and having reduced earnings (just setting the scene here so no drip feed!).

I would never ever not make a meal for all of us every evening...and he even gets to sleep in a seperate room so the baby doesn't wake him at night as he has a stressful job and is a light sleeper.

Today I went to a friends house at 4pm, hubby offered to look after the baby so I could have some time off as he's on annual leave. I stayed with friend until 7pm, drank some wine and then called hubby and offered to pick up a takeaway on the way home...he said no because he would cook what was in the fridge (a ready meal for two and a bottle of Cava). So I say cool, I'll be home within the hour for dinner, see you soon...

I get home just over an hour later, the house is a tip, the babies bottles have not been sterislised/made up and all that is left of the ready meal is two tiny cold potatoes in a foil tray. The Cava is still intact thank fuck!!

Now he says he thought I was at a restaurant without him and didn't have time to cook dinner for me or make the babies bottles for the night. I'm bloody furious, should I just drink the Cava, get drunk and verbally abuse him and let him look after the baby all night. Or should I just post this in relationships and get a fucking divorce before I even ask.

I'm furuious - even a cheese toastie would have been ok, but to come home to two cold potatoes...wtf? He's gone to bed and took the baby with him. AIBU to neck the Cava and gob off like a fish wife on Mumsnet?

OP posts:
theincredibequeenofwands · 30/12/2011 21:58

Drink the Cava.

Original poster
TheCokeMachine · 30/12/2011 21:59

It's open and I may have more to say soon!

OP posts:
RhondaGotStuckInTheChimneyRoo · 30/12/2011 21:59

Smash the bottle of Cava over the selfish bastards head???

(am single btw so probably not the best person to comment)

(oh, and do not condone violence honest!)

rhondajean · 30/12/2011 22:01

Given others threads tonight, I won't even joke about violence.

What's to stop him making your toastie now?

HandMini · 30/12/2011 22:01

Doesn't sound ideal...drink the cava, watch a film, discuss this with him in the cold light of day tomorrow

RhondaGotStuckInTheChimneyRoo · 30/12/2011 22:02

Oh, sorry, haven't read any 'contentious' threads this evening.

My comment was light hearted.

Apologies.

rhondajean · 30/12/2011 22:10

Don't worry other Rhonda, im just feeling a bit delicate because of it, usually id be first in line for the slapstick humour.

Original poster
TheCokeMachine · 30/12/2011 22:13

I hadn't read anything contentious either eek - sorry for being flippant but I really am pissed off. I appreciate your comment Rhonda, it was taken in context.

He ate all the bread too - I've got a choice of HIPP Organic First Milk or Cava...and he's just dumped the baby in the moses basket next to me, which kind of spoils the Cava idea boo.

OP posts:
RhondaGotStuckInTheChimneyRoo · 30/12/2011 22:13

I'm in a bit of a 'down' place this eve so have come on MN, hidden anything that looks even slightly 'fighty' or upsetting (sorry to anybody who can't hide from their problems this eve) and am trying to create merriment....to drown out said misery!

OP - not that I didn't take your post seriously, I was being flippant though. Drinking the cava is the way forward. Agree though, speak to him in the morning and leave him in no doubt as to exactly what he has done and how selfish he has been.

RhondaGotStuckInTheChimneyRoo · 30/12/2011 22:14

oops xpost OP Grin

rhondajean · 30/12/2011 22:23

I still don't get why he can't cook for you now!!

I def go for the cava option :-)

Rhonda hope everything is okay xx

Original poster
TheCokeMachine · 30/12/2011 22:23

I'll do the Cava tonight and give him hell tomorrow...he's just taken the baby upstairs again.

Found some day out of date chilli prawns at the back of the fridge, I may chance them as the cheap Cava will surely sterilise everything.

OP posts:
rhondajean · 30/12/2011 22:24

Or go get you a takeaway!

Original poster
TheCokeMachine · 30/12/2011 22:24

Either that or I could drink the Milton out of the bottle bucket?

OP posts:
rhondajean · 30/12/2011 22:25

Yay prawns, he has to look after you if you get food poisoning and you get to tell him it's all,his fault.

JarethTheGoblinKing · 30/12/2011 22:26

DON'T chance the prawns!

Wow, he sounds a right charmer.

RhondaGotStuckInTheChimneyRoo · 30/12/2011 22:28

ooo no to the food poisoning - you couldn't enjoy your revenge then!

Order a lovely take-away for you and sit there eating it and don't offer him any.

mwahahahahahaaaa!

Grin

ps - thanks other Rhonda, MN keeping me smiling Smile

slowburner · 30/12/2011 22:35

When our DD got home I was glued to the sofa from 5pm onwards, and pretty much unable to make any food. DH can cook sausages, potatoes and sweetcorn. That's it. If he didn't make it we didn't eat.

I think it's time for you to o on stroke. You look after the baby all day, he looks after you. I had friends whose husbands would get up, shower, let the wife have a shower and get fessed, make her breakfast and a packed lunch, then go to work and bring home dinner. I could wish.

I let my DH sleep separately too, eventually at about 14months, DD has never slept longer than 3 hours I had a total breakdown and he HAD to start doing a few night shifts. Oh, and I went back to work when DD was 6 months. Do NOT think your need for sleep is less than his, you are a h uman being too. And he has demonstrated tonight just how much he thinks of you as a team, greedy git.

slowburner · 30/12/2011 22:37

Stroke? Strike. Damn iPad.

And our DD was a NICU baby, so loads of therapy on a daily basis so ideally had my hands full.

Original poster
TheCokeMachine · 30/12/2011 22:52

You ordered on 30/12/2011 at 22:49:17
You have successfully placed this order with Papa John's C

Oh yes, you will smell the pizza and drool. And tomorrow we will be having 'an adult' conversation about shared responsibility.

In the mean time...the pizza is mine!

OP posts:
slowburner · 30/12/2011 22:57

Ha ha ha

Actually, I could quite fancy a swift baileys while DH is settling the baby. We co sleep and I only take over at midnight. Took me about 16 months to get THAT agreed.

SparkySparrow · 30/12/2011 23:00

Grin Enjoy your pizza! Make sure you wave some in his face before you eat it al!

Maryz · 30/12/2011 23:00

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

scarletforya · 30/12/2011 23:28

Don't give him any pizza.

If he's hungry tell him there's some cold potatoes going begging. And stop doing so much in general.

rhondajean · 30/12/2011 23:49

Nooooo, I want pizza now!

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