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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

At comments about young mums = bad mums

124 replies

teenagedirtbag · 15/12/2011 22:17

Had my sacn today. We had a diffrent nurse than usual and as she was looking through my records she said
'oh you had your first child at 16. she read down ah I'm not surprised'
Dp gave her look of death and asked what the comment was for. She said
'well that he passed while you were so young'
(lost him shortly after birth)
I shrugged it off as me being paranoid.
She then said 'Oh well you kept your other kids alive'
She then turned to DD2 who we had to bring with us as we had no child care and she was bored of colouring and was wandering around checking out the room. The nurse turned to her and said Do mummy and Daddy feed you? or is he step daddy number 10?. She turned to Dp and said' Tell your wifes child to stop prancing in my room'
(All the DC's are ours)
She also kept asking if we had a council house? (Does that matter?)
and if we actually worked for a living. (Dp does I've been a SAHM since DD2 was born)
So am I paranoid ?or Can I go back tomorrow and complain?

OP posts:
ThatVikRinA22 · 16/12/2011 00:18

am i the only one to report this thread?

the only shit on this one Carrie is the smell of the BS...

LEttletownofBOFlehem · 16/12/2011 00:24

Probably, Vicar

Kayano · 16/12/2011 00:28

What do you put
When reporting?

Is bullshit - please delete enough? Confused

LEttletownofBOFlehem · 16/12/2011 00:29

Yup

LordOfTheFlies · 16/12/2011 00:31

I tell you what- if it is BS- which I'm convinced 99.9% of it is- the poster should be ashamed.
NHS workers have enough crap to put up with day-to-day without this .

CumpyGruntWithJinglyBellsOn · 16/12/2011 00:35

I don't believe you.

SucksToBeMe · 16/12/2011 00:54
Hmm
lisaro · 16/12/2011 01:06

If you're going to do this, at least make it slightly believable.

LoveInAColdClimate · 16/12/2011 07:12

Oh dear, am I really gullible in having believed the OP, then? But why would someone make this up?

olibeansmummy · 16/12/2011 07:23

If this isn't true ( which I'm 99.99% certain it isn't) the op should be ashamed of herself.

SantaDesperatelySeeksSedatives · 16/12/2011 07:36

I thought I recognised your username!

So you "excepted" your partners apology in the end then? Hmm

For what it's worth, I'm not sure I'm convinced by this either. I've had bitchy comments made to me about being a "young mum" but honestly if someone had said all that bullshit tome I wouldn't be coming on MN to ask if it was ok to complain. I'd have just complained.And gone apeshit. Because obviously it wouldn't be ok to say all that stuff Hmm

RaraGigglePixie · 16/12/2011 08:12

Actually, I can sort of believe this.

When I went to my MW appointment with ds2, I had ds1 with me and Dp couldn't attend because he was working away.

As soon as I walked in, without even lifting her head to look at me, the MW said "So do you know who the father of this one is" When I picked my jaw up off the floor and replied, Of course I do, she came out with "and I suppose it's a different man to that of your first child?" I said No, same father. She muttered, yeah alright then and said "So you're a single mother now? On benefits?" No, I'm still with my Dp not claiming any benefits now what exactly does this have to do with my pregnancy?

Op if this is true, and I can crisply believe maybe some of what was said, then complain, & loudly.

RaraGigglePixie · 16/12/2011 08:13

Certainly* not crispy.

StealthPenguin · 16/12/2011 08:15

Bollocks.

RealiTreeCoveredInTinsel · 16/12/2011 08:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

slavetofilofax · 16/12/2011 08:16

I was 20 when I had my first, but I looked younger and the HCP's kept asking me my age and telling me they thought I was younger. The whole time I was treated with nothing but respect, and that was across two different hospitals.

MudAndGlitter · 16/12/2011 08:18

Ive never had any of these comments from nurses!
Bullshit. Even if it did happen surely you would know to complain?

picklepost · 16/12/2011 08:18

i think you need to complain. she appears to have omitted any intrusive questions about your rioting prowess and how many flat screen televisions you have in your possession. unbelievable.

Lafawnduh · 16/12/2011 08:19

1.Bollocks.

  1. if it was a scan it wouldn't have been a nurse doing it.
  2. If you must take a small child with you at least make sure it sits still and doesn't wander around.
gingysmummy · 16/12/2011 08:24

what total guff,i am a hcp and theres no way on earth that it's true,why did'nt ur dp have a huge go at her my dh or i would off, she would be struck off long b4 now if she said such things,there are thousands of folk that have been young mums and i'm sure she would of pasted judgement on others b4 now,
u need to stop telling stories!

LalasMama · 16/12/2011 08:33

I sort of believed the first part. When i went for a scan for DC2, I took DC1 with me as I had no childcare. The lady looked at my notes and muttered "19 years old and 2 kids, shouldnt be allowed to happen". This scan was at 7 weeks because I was bleeding and she sighed when she said "everything looks fine". I complained on my way out and wrote a formal complaint to the hospital.
I find it really hard to believe you though OP. I really hope you arent telling the truth.

Kova · 16/12/2011 10:21

Pants on fire mefinks.

whackamole · 16/12/2011 10:24

Sorry I don't believe you.

Too many outrageous comments in one go.

GandTiceandaSprout · 16/12/2011 10:45

High schools are out on the christmas break.

StaceymAloneForver · 16/12/2011 10:52

i was 17 when i had dd, and never had any comments like this...

also pantsonfire

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