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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to have a quick nose at DSIL's bank statement when she nipped out the room?

92 replies

ChaosTrulyReigns · 08/12/2011 20:47

C'mon, everyone does it.

Grin

I'd nipped round this afternoon to have a coffee and discuss Boxing Day arrangements with her any excuse. She wanted to show me what she'd bought for the DC and pooped out to the garage to fetch it, so I sprung into action and had a quick squizz at the Halifax statement sticking out her paperwork basket where she keeps this stuff. Wink

I'm pretty certain that I managed to jump away in time as she came back in the room, therefore covering my tracks.

I'm not BU am I?

(lots of interesting transactions on the account btw Grin)

OP posts:
witherhills · 09/12/2011 05:26

Of course she was being unreasonable.
Funny Comments like "how nosy" and you "cheeky monkey" are just because it's you chaos.
This is not acceptable in any universe

mebythesea · 09/12/2011 06:53

I think its very bad form.
I came into the room once to find our childminder deep in rummage mode looking in a bank file. She also read personal letters, cards etc even when we were in the room, she got the boot fairly quickly.

peggyblackett · 09/12/2011 07:06

Reading someone else's texts, letters, e-mails etc. without their consent is a shoite thing to do :(.

I always think that anyone who does this potentially may read something that hurts them - karma and all that. It's just not worth it.

exoticfruits · 09/12/2011 07:12

YABU-I just wouldn't do it.

AbsofCroissant · 09/12/2011 07:41

It's very uncool - and what exotic said about karma can happen.

There was a guy I knew at university who was a bit, erm, highly strung and annoying, and I had him in my phone as "Annoying X". He invited himself around for dinner to my flat, and while I was cooking was rifling through my mobile and found out what I'd put his name as. He was very upset.

StealthPolarBear · 09/12/2011 07:44

I KNEW it was the other way round!

HecateGoddessOfTwelfthNight · 09/12/2011 07:48

Rhinestone Thu 08-Dec-11 21:02:30

I think you're incredibly rude, vulgar and sound like a nightmare SIL. What else do you interfere with?

A bit stunned at all the posters laughing along with you tbh.

rhinestone - I know chaos and knew there was no way this was serious. As it turns out, it was reverse and it was her SIL who looked at her statement.

But even if it hadn't been that, chaos is lovely and there is no way that she would actually have done that. So it was safe to be daft about it.

If there had been any chance at all that she truly meant what she had said, and the attitude about it, my reply would have been very different.

But you have to 'know' the poster, I think. If you don't, then you take the post at face value, naturally.

Quite amusing to read all the replies from people who haven't read the thread and don't know that it's chaos's SIL who read HER bank statement. Grin

exoticfruits · 09/12/2011 07:49

I didn't say anything about karma-wrong person-but it is true.
I can't believe that the person further up the thread thinks you can open post addressed to others because it comes to your address!

WhoIsThatMaskedWoman · 09/12/2011 07:52

I'm nosy as hell, and always browse the stuff people have on their pin boards (ballet timetables, school fairs, doctors appointments), I also peek at people's emails while I'm chatting to them at work. But even I would never do this.

VivaLeBeaver · 09/12/2011 07:56

I read the first few posts without registering who the OP was and was gobsmacked by the numbher of people who said they'd do this! Grin

Now I see its Chaos and a reverse one.

Yeah, SIL was bang out of order but she has form doesn't she? It is you with the bat shit crazy SIL isn't it?

Northernlurker · 09/12/2011 07:59

That's Reality isn't it?

AbsofCroissant · 09/12/2011 08:00

Sorry exotic (lazy - just looked at the name above)

VivaLeBeaver · 09/12/2011 08:04

Oh yes it is Reality, sorry.

SanTEEClaus · 09/12/2011 08:10

It wouldn't bother me but I also think all the embarrassment/secrecy about money is a bit silly.

TandB · 09/12/2011 08:14

I am very relieved that this was revealed as a reverse AIBU before I posted a "I am surprised at you, Chaos" type response!

I would be spitting teeth if I caught my SIL doing this. I was angry enough when I found out that BIL (SIL's husband) had tried to weasel information out of FIL about our house purchase because he thought FIL had lent us money - he hadn't. When FIL said no, he went and asked MIL, presumably to see if he got a different answer. If he genuinely thought it was any of his business he would have felt able to ask us outright.

samandi · 09/12/2011 09:31

Reverse AIBU?

Yes of course she is being incredibly unreasonable. Looking at other people's bank statements is just weird, frankly. I don't know if I'd be that angry, but I'd certainly be extremely disdainful and think what a freak she was.

Trills · 09/12/2011 09:35

Someone is definitely rude and overstepping privacy bounds and shouldn't expect to get coffee and biscuits if they don't know how to behave in other people's houses.

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