to sell the school they can sing for this?

[giveyourselfashiny]

ds1. 11, 1st yr high school came home monday minus his school shoes. he had P.E. left his clothes in the changing room, as they all do, and when it came to getting changed back his shoes were gone. he asked the P.E. teacher who said, nothing i can do, ask the lads sitting near you if they have seen them. he asked and had a look and then got told to get to his next lesson. at the end of the day he went to the office to see if they had been handed in then went back to the P.E changing to see if they had apperared.
they havent.
when he came home i called the school to see if they had been handed in by any of the cleaners etc but they hadnt.
he came home with a pass so that yesterday he is allowed to wear trainers, which he did.
he text me on his lunch hr to tell me his form tutor has said he only gets a pass for one day and he needs shoes for tomorrow or he is on detention.
my thought is no farking way.
i called the reception to see if they had apperaed yet and was told no so i said that until they had been found he would be continuting to wear his trainers. the receptionist said that wasnt allowed and he would be put on detention, i said please get his form tutor to call me when he is free as this was not acceptable, teacher called me back after school to tell me that if he wasnt in regulation uniform he would be put on report and detention until he had the correct uniform.I said he had no chance and that i have already supplied him with the uniform and until he had gone up a size in shoes, ( so when he trainers are too small so i know his shoes would have been too small) i would not be buying more school shoes.
apparelty i should now expect a call from the head.
AIBU?

YANBU

I wouldn't be able to afford to replace a pair of shoes this close to Christmas!

YANBU to expect at least a weekend to arrive so you can buy more (cheap) shoes (and as its so close to the end of term YANBU to expect that 2 weeks max in trainers is acceptable).

YABU to wait until his feet grow a whole size.

What a PITA though.

No you aren't!!

I have had this happen with my own ds, they turned up eventually. But I caved, and bought a cheap pair as we were 2 weeks off end of term

Were they named? Prob not if secondary

Seems harsh to put him on detention when he has done nothing wrong! Tell the Head he /she has a thief in their midst!

YANBU.

Schools seem to think parents are made of money.

Clarify with the school whether the changing rooms were locked during the lesson and ask them what investigation they are doing to find the shoes. Ask them if they provide lockers if the room is not locked. Schools have insurance but it will depend on the cost -you can try to make a claim against a theft.

YANBU, I would be fuming. Hope you get it sorted.

I think you should just buy him a cheap pair of supermarket shoes. He will probably feel uncomfortable wearing trainers for school because he will look our of place.

I think this will help teach him that he has to look after his belongings, obviously he didn't lose them on purpose, but people don't just go around stealing shoes. If his shoes have been stolen, I would be thinking that he could be being bullied and would be much more worried about that than the cost of a cheap pair of shoes.

Petty theft is rife in most secondary schools, and I think that unless the school provides adequately sized, secure lockers, they have no right to threaten detention if things disappear.

Tell the school as far as you are concerned it is theft. Ask if they have reported the theft to the police.

YANBU. Does the school think you are made of money?

slavetofilofax
they have lockers, but not in the changing rooms, they are told to put clothes in their bags and shoes under the bench, he did this along with every other boy in there.
there have been some bullying issues and i am worried that this is in the same vain.

They are being unreasonable to only give you a day to buy new shoes. So close to the end of term, maybe you could plead with them to allow your son to wear his trainers until the start of the new term (do you break up a week on Friday?) Any other time, I'd say a week should be enough.

YABU to want to wait until his feet have grown, though. It's not exactly the school's fault he lost his shoes. What does their uniform policy say?

Hope you get to the bottom of it. If it's connected with bullying being punished by the school for the absent schools a double whammy. Let us know how it goes.

he didnt loose his shoes, they were taken, they may have been stolen, or hidden but they were still taken. its not like he put them down and forgot about them.

delia, i had hoped that the bullying was in the past, we have had nearly 2 weeks clear. but the 2 lads are in this PE class and it just seems a bit too much of a coincidence.

It is annoying. I agree that you need to make sure he's not being bullied.

i think i might have to speak to them about a meeting. should be fun.

YANBU. My DS came home once with two left shoes, and there was no way I was going to buy a new pair, as I guessed that someone with two right shoes would come forward in time. The school gave him open-ended permission to wear trainers and I e-mailed the form tutor to ask her to send a message to the relevant boys who had been doing Games. The shoes did eventually find their rightful owners.

I think it would be fair to insist he wears trainers until the end of term, but you'll have to buy new shoes before the start of next term. Your DS has some responsibility for ensuring his clothes don't get mixed up with other people's.

they didnt get mixed up tho, he came home with no shoes. he asked the teacher who said he wasnt allowed to check the other boys shoes or bags. that my ds just had to ask himself.

In that case you definately need to be focusing your attention on the bullying and not the shoes. The school should be making some effort to find out what has happened here.

If it's an issue that things might be picked up purposely by others, he really needs to have a bag that everything can be tightly packed away into, so no-one can quickly remove something from it in the short space of time that no-one's looking.

YANBU, the school should be responsible for theft of clothing during PE lessons if they don't provide lockers or a locked changing room. It's not like he left them laying around just anywhere, he was having his PE lesson!

He should be allowed to wear trainers until the end of term...

On the possible bullying, did he check the bins? If someone has taken them out of spite they are unlikely to have kept them, they probably threw them in the nearest bin :(

The amount of stuff stolen in dd's school is appalling. They don't have lockers, so have to leave their coats, PE kit etc in the cloakroom.

The school are in complete denial about the amount of theft. Even when dd's PE kit was disappearing at the same time every week, and reappearing the next day sweaty and smelly having been worn by someone else, she was getting into trouble for "losing her PE kit".

Scholes34, if it was all in 1 bag then there is a possiblity that the whole lot might get taken.