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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

100% attendance certificates at DS's school, aibu?

362 replies

BoobleBeep · 02/12/2011 10:57

DS's school has just announced they will be giving out certificates to children with 100% attendance in an assembly at the end of term..... This basically excludes any child who has been ill at any point throught the year, needed dental treatment or has parents who can't afford to take them away during expensive term time. Aibu to be a bit pissed off about this?

OP posts:
McHappyPants2012 · 09/01/2012 21:49

but it still is not fair on the children who are ill or got regular appoinments because of a SN.

together me and my son can work on his spelling, maths, english ect but we can't improve on his attendance.

tethersend · 09/01/2012 21:58

Don't worry Jools, I just got so exasperated with this the first time round- Must...try...to...resist... Wink

"I think that people are focusing too much on those who don't get the rewards and saying they are being punished. If my child doesn't get all her words right even though she tried hard and another child gets a sticker for getting all theirs correct I would not say that is a punishment to her that is praise for the other. There is nothing wrong with recognising individual achievements."

Actually, my issue is not that it is unfair on those who do not receive them, but that the whole system makes a mockery of achievement awards, as to reward attendance at primary level is to reward a child for something they have no control over.

The attendance award devalues the rewards children receive for their own achievements, such as the hypothetical one you describe.

You may as well reward children for having blue eyes.

PuffPants · 09/01/2012 22:05

How is not getting one a punishment?

Why can't those who turned up every day have a reward?

There are lots of awards and commendations not open to me, for various reasons, so what?

Joolsdawn · 09/01/2012 22:08

But does everything have to be fair? As I said they are not punishing the other children or taking anything away from them they are just recognising that some have 100% attendance. Yes you can work on spelling but some will never be able to spell, I have dyslexia and I am 31 and still can't spell no matter how hard I work on it (spell check is my life saver) a dyslexic child will never get top in reading or writing. So does that mean we shouldn't praise the ones that do well.
How about an obese child who's parents don't make them eat healthy so they are over weight and slow, their fault? No. But will they win first prize in sports day? No. should we cancel that too?

Praise and rewards are very motivational to children and to take them away or make them meaningless by giving everyone a "prize for taking part" in the intrest of fairness would not only demotivating them but also not prepare them for the real world where... Not everyone gets everything.

tethersend · 09/01/2012 22:09

"Why can't those who turned up every day have a reward?"

They can! Just as long as you bear in mind that 'those who turn up' are the parents, not the children. The children are taken to school, they do not decide whether to attend or not. So perhaps we should give the certificates to the parents?

Joolsdawn · 09/01/2012 22:16

Tethersend - do you really not think that a child going to school every day as an achievement? And again I am not saying it is a failure not too for legitimate reasons. But I am sure every parent have had days when their child isn't keen to go. Sofa and telly much more appealing, but if these rewards stop the fibbing about sore tummys or whining all the way to school and get a child enthusiastic about going to school and learning where is the problem?

tethersend · 09/01/2012 22:17

Jools, you are missing my point; the message given to children by these awards- winners and losers- is totally at odds with the rewarding of achievement in all other areas.

I have never advocated giving everyone 'a prize for taking part'. That would be ludicrous, and meaningless. That is not my argument. This is not about rewarding everybody for attendance. I would rather reward nobody for attendance, and instead concentrate on rewarding children for the things they are in control of. The function of rewards is, after all, to promote a desired behaviour.

tethersend · 09/01/2012 22:21

Where is the problem?

Leaving aside the neglected child who stays off school to care for younger siblings, the child with chronic illness who is excluded from the end of term disco and the children who erroneously believe that they have achieved something because their parent dropped them off at school every morning, the impact on attendance of the children you describe is minimal.

When children have serious attendance issues, it is the parent who is prosecuted and responsible. Why then is the child rewarded when the attendance is good?

McHappyPants2012 · 09/01/2012 22:22

On the flip side these rewards encourage children to go in sick.

2ndtimeblues · 09/01/2012 22:25

Attendance and puncutality are the only awards my son has ever received. I'm rather fond of them. So I guess it depends on your child. I think they even out. And I have no problem with "all must win prizes" in a primary school. It's like pass the parcel. Lots of positives, lots of praise. All must have degrees even if you end up in debt. I'm much more concered with that.

McHappyPants2012 · 09/01/2012 22:26

Tbh I would rather a child get praised when they have done something, like if they struggle with reading and writing and they have done a special effort then get a sticker or most improved certificate

2ndtimeblues · 09/01/2012 22:27

And showing up on time very day is a good habit. If you can't because of ill health then you can't and you mustn't feel bad about it. But it doesn't meant that it's not a good habit and one worth rewarding.

Lueji · 09/01/2012 22:29

I totally hate this sort of thing.
DS would never get one because he always gets a few days ill over the course of a year.
I'd be inclined to send DS to school with a fever and let them take care of him...

As others mentioned I'm sure the teachers wouldn't like it if it was on them

tethersend · 09/01/2012 22:29

Every child has done something they can be rewarded for. EVERY child. 2ndtime, I bet your son has achieved something at school.

There is no need to resort to arbitrary and meaningless attendance awards.

tethersend · 09/01/2012 22:30

The parents 'show up', not the child. Reward them for the 'good habit'.

2ndtimeblues · 09/01/2012 22:32

And "sick" is so subjective. I had to be practically delirious with a fever before my mother would have let me have a day off school. I'm not as tough with my kids. But, as a teacher, I've read some of the reasons parents give and, really, sometimes they're not sick. Or not sick enough to miss school.

2ndtimeblues · 09/01/2012 22:35

I don't think high attendance is meaningless though. I think it's a good thing. It's strongly correlated with fulfilling your potential. Both in school and in life.

Joolsdawn · 09/01/2012 22:36

As I have said previously a large reward like a trip or disco is unfair I am just talking about a small recognition...
I am only talking from my own experience of my own child's school...

They get a class reward for best dressed class each week (all uniform correct) - at this age their parents have control over that.

They get sticker rewards for getting their word boxes right - they bring them home to learn so it is up to their parents to help them.

They also have reading books to do at home and get stickers for good reading - again I sit with my child and do this at home.

They are punished in school for bad behaviour - excluding any developmental or behavioural problems, they will have been taught to behave appropriately at home

A child of this age is completely influenced and controlled by their parents and it effects everything they do in school and out, so anything you give a reward/punishment for is not really within their control.

But rewards make them feel proud yes I agree they do promote a desired behavour and if it helps one child say to a mother who can't be bothered bringing them to school " please mum or I won't get my attendance" or stops another from pulling a sticky then they have done their job.

MummyTubb · 09/01/2012 22:36

YABU. It is just a certificate. Well, maybe a prize too - who knows?!

DS achieved 100% attendance for every term of every year he was at his infant school. He got a certificate every term, another certificate and a prize each year, and he got a special prize at the end of his time there for being the only child out of 90 who'd never been absent. I was very proud of him.

DD will never manage that achievement having spent most of one term in hospital/at home recovering from a serious illness. My children understand that whilst DS's achievement was fab it was made possible by a hefty dose of luck. That said, my children would have to be properly ill before I would consider keeping them at home since it means trying to find childcare.

If siblings can deal with this situation, then so can everyone else.

workshy · 09/01/2012 22:37

at our primary, the children who get 100% attendance for the year are going to be put into a drawer to win a bike

it's 2 form entry and in year 5 only 6 children are still in the running and in year 3 there are 8 of them

so obviously really motivational Hmm

very OTT if you ask me

tethersend · 09/01/2012 22:37

There is a much stronger correlation between students fulfilling their potential and parental income.

Why not reward children whose parents earn over, say £40k pa?

tethersend · 09/01/2012 22:40

"As I have said previously a large reward like a trip or disco is unfair I am just talking about a small recognition..."

I am confused by this, Jools- why is a disco unfair, but a certificate not? The principle is exactly the same.

Citing examples of other bizarre rewards for things outside a child's control simply compounds the problem; it doesn't justify attendance awards.

2ndtimeblues · 09/01/2012 22:41

Schools can't do anything about parental income and it's not of their business anyway. But schools can and should do something about attendance. They can make it a focus and reward high attendance and chase up poor attenders. And generally send out mesages that being on school on time ever day is a good thing. That's all the certificates are. A message that certain behaviour patterrns are a good thing. If a child is powerfully distressed about not getting one then I think it's got out of hand. But that isn't necessarily the school's fault. After all, it's mainly parents who seem to dislike the system.

IUseTooMuchKitchenRoll · 09/01/2012 22:47

Does it really do any harm to the children that don't get these awards though? That's the whole point surely, if you are going to disagree with it.

They might feel disappointed not to get an award, but then children will always feel a bit disappointed about little things like this at primary school. They could be dissappointed that they didn't get chosen to fetch the milk, or get the higest mark in a spelling test, or be Mary in the nativity, or get any of the other little rewards or jobs that are given out at school. They will all get a turn to be chosen for something, they will all get a turn to be good at something.

I can't see why people object so strongly to these awards.

Our school does bronze, silver and gold attendance awards, which I think is a better way of doing it, so children who have only had one or two days off for genuine reasons still get to have one.

2ndtimeblues · 09/01/2012 22:49

Bronze, silver and gold is much better, I agree.