to think that thanking your own organic juice to give to your child at a party because you disapprove of the squash provided by the hosts us just rude?

[OhBuggerandArse]

Obviously I don't think I'm being unreasonable and would really just like you all to join me in my disgruntled ire. But go on, give it a shot at putting the other side of the story. No behavioural issues involved, if anyone was wondering whether that might be a possible tactic.

Unlike Christina F, I'm not really surprised that anyone would buy squash, or even serve it. Lots of people like it so I really don't think it's rude to do so (or is this a class thing?) I am however surprised that people would be so rude as to call food served by the host of a party their children attended "nasty", ''boggin" or "shite". Or that they were so fearful of the food to be served that they filled them up with other food beforehand. Why let your precious child attend the squash-serving den of iniquity at all then?

I loved hearing about the non-hydrating water though

Not too rude given that the hosts often described the food in the same terms as it was often supplied by a soft play centre.

I was thinking about this thread today and it reminded me that one of the reasons why my mother didn't allow us to have squash (way back in the 70s) was because "it goes right through you". Which is interesting given the 'water just makes you wee' view expressed earlier in the thread. I suspect that the reason my mother felt this was a true observation is that she'd seen kids drinking way more squash then they ever would water.

I think that most squash is quite nasty, which is why I didn't serve it to my children when they were small, feeling that it would (in general) be wrong to give my children something I thought horrible, but there are now nice cordials (which I miss because you can't buy them here - I've been making them instead, which has been quite enjoyable but a lot more time consuming that picking a bottle off the shelf).

I think it is a bit on the OTT side to feel that bringing your own drink to a party is 'incredibly unpleasant and offensive' it's petty common for adults to do so after all. Especially if all we are talking about is squash for goodness sake, it's not like you cooked cordon bleu and someone turned up with a KFC bucket is it?

Nooka Taking a bottle of wine to a dinner party/house party is somewhat different- the intention is either that it's a gift for the host or that it alleviates the cost to the host. It's not as though people turn up to a dinner party, see what wine the host opens, and then whip out their own.

Where I live people frequently bring their own drinks when they are visiting, and often take them home again too. It took a while to get used to, but it does make entertaining much easier. Obviously as a host you still have to offer drinks too, and usually the brought offering is up for grabs too, but our visitors often expect to drink their own brew/wine/spirits.

I think that whether supplying your child with a drink is rude or not really depends on how it's done, and the OP hasn't actually said at any point what the mother said/did at the party (apart from supplying the juice).

But Nooka- is that because you're in the ME, so it's hard to come by? I used to live in Dubai and it was similar.

All I can say is that in the UK it would be considered most unusual to go to a dinner party and expect to drink what you brought (in fact, I seem to remember there was a thread dedicated to this exact topic )

No I'm in Canada, booze is fairly easily accessible (although expensive). Just a different tradition I guess (might even be a local one, who knows).

Oh sorry- I thought you were in Qatar- bit of a difference!! I remember from the thread that there were certain countries where this was the norm- think NZ might have been another one.

People often take their own drinks when visiting, thinking of wine, but the host may well just keep it for another day and serve their own wine. Even if they took their own soft drink it would apply-unless you have a medical reason you can't say ' I brought it because I don't want yours and mine is much superior'!
The whole thing is much too precious. It is very easy at the party-you just ask for water. My suspicion is that the mother isn't as health conscious as she likes to think and the DC won't drink water and the mother gives in with juice.

I really couldn't care less if a mum sent her child to party I was having with a drink/food!

I understand that some people don't like their kids eating/drinking certain stuff & that allergies also need to be factored in!

I just think there are better things to worry about than people bring food/drink to a party!

IMO it is worthy of a gentle eye roll but not fuming indignation.

I've done it with ds when he had an intolerance to aspartame (which thenkfully he seems to have grwon out of). I have the intolerance too and so does my mother. it isn't nice and causes stomach cramps and diarrhoea.

I did used to be discrete and only used the juice after I had enquired about what was on offer. Sometimes water wasn't easily available. If for example fruit shoots were provided then to ask for water you needed to find a paper cup and community centre taps often produce lukewarm stuff. Besides if everyone else at a party was enjoying squash as a treat why should ds not have something nice too (just something that wouldn't give him the runs)

Does anywhere sell party rings with no nasties in?

Even if places do - if your child has their heart set having their class invited to a party at the local play centre - you can bet your bottom dollar they won't be catering it from m and s. And they will all be fine and have a lot of fun.
Although I dare say people whose kids 'don't like' squash also 'don't like' uncouth places like playcentres either.

I agree-as soon as they start going out and about without you they will get offered squash and you can't follow them about with the organic juice. I can guarantee that school parties, Beaver, Rainbow parties etc will have squash.(and soon after that they will have fizzy)

exoticfruits: "If I was to change career and train for something else I would go into nutrition because it seems an area where people are utterly clueless. They seem to equate a healthy diet for a DC with a diet for a overweight woman who wants to slim."

This! My (absolutely lovely) SIL queried me giving my 1 year old son a chunk of avocado, "because they contain fat".

What kind of world is it, when giving children fruit is something to question?

I would never serve party rings to my kids. Never. Because as soon as I'd bought the pack for the party I would scoff the lot (out of sight of DD of course - too good for children ).

My (absolutely lovely) SIL queried me giving my 1 year old son a chunk of avocado, "because they contain fat".

This is exactly why I would like to retrain.

I remember the story of one woman who cut out all fats and her toddler had picked up a pack of butter in the supermarket and was licking it! Her body was craving fat-it was at least a wake up call for the mother who changed her ways.

We have got so neurotic about it that DCs don't know a healthy meal. When I was supply teaching one of my tasks was to do a science assessment with yr 4 on healthy eating. They were given the picture of a plate and supposed to draw a healthy meal. Not one of them drew what I would think of as a healthy meal,ie. a protein (fish, meat, pulses etc)potato or pasta or rice etc and veg. They had the most bizarre combinations, but nearly every DC had a piece of broccoli and a lot had a lump of cheese. I thought, what have we done to our DCs that they can't draw a spaghetti bolognese or a fish pie and peas etc?
When I was a DC aged 8/9 yrs we would just have drawn a normal family meal.

Here's another example for you. One of the proud grandparents (a grandfather, to be precise) came around to visit when the twins were newborns.

Now, here's the background, which he knew. Twins slightly premature, and low birthweight. Not life-threateningly so, or anything, but enough to make sure they were on the Hospital's outpatient list after discharge. Nurse/health visitors/midwives came around each week to weigh them, and husband and I were working hard to get their weight up. Our target at one point according to the nurse was 100g per whatever (I can't remember what the precise time period was). The smaller one went up by 200g. Now, I was ecstatic, as you may imagine.

Grandfather's response: "oh dear. What is the doctor going to do about it?" He thought the doctor would be concerned that they'd put on too much weight! They were 3 weeks old!

Wtf are party rings? Did they not exist in the early 80s or are they just something I never knew the name of?

I have never got over a post on here because a woman was outraged because her DC with a packed lunch was having to sit next to a DC with a school dinner-who-wait for it.......whisper.....was eating- custard. (Apparently custard was the work of the devil)