to think that thanking your own organic juice to give to your child at a party because you disapprove of the squash provided by the hosts us just rude?

[OhBuggerandArse]

Obviously I don't think I'm being unreasonable and would really just like you all to join me in my disgruntled ire. But go on, give it a shot at putting the other side of the story. No behavioural issues involved, if anyone was wondering whether that might be a possible tactic.

I was replying more to some of the responses which went along the lines of "blimey, precious, much?" etc.

and yes, there are many different issues at play with my children (dd1 in particular). but even some quite close friends do not know why she never drinks squash, for eg - and would probably say it is because I am 'anti-chemicals" etc. because for obvious (to me) reasons flavourings/preservatives/colourings and so on are not present in my house. and all my children are trained to ask me 'can I have this?" when given a new food. and would probably all look interested in new foods/drinks if given by an adult with the attitude of 'yes, i know mummy says you can't, but it'll be ok'

dd1 would deffo drink squash, if it was given to her (but would have to be in her sports bottle, thankfully, so not likely). the others would at least mention allergies etc, and ask if it was ok for them to have. but she wouldn't. and I have more than once (when she was younger) swooped and taken something off her. but it only takes one who thinks they know better than me, or who prefers to ridicule what they see as pfb-ness.

I think the " he only trashed your house because you gave him a smartie" brigade have done much to make life difficult for the parents of genuinely allergic children.

Not really relevant but interesting.

I think most people can tell the dfferences between kids with allergies (a small minority) and those with PFB mummees (far too common), its the way the mother behaves that sets teeth on edge in my experience.

CBA to read the whole bunfight but I am peeing myself with laughter at the 'non-hydrating water'.

Seriously, Crapabble, you've just misunderstood something. Water is the perfect drink, provided it's clean and isn't going to give you nasties. How on earth do you think the human race has survived for 100,000s of years before squash was invented? When life was more arduous and there was no can of lucozade to reach for after chasing a mammoth for 2 days solid?

DD2 has kidney problems. The very best thing for her to drink is water. That's from the top Consultant at Addenbrooks. According to him, it is the easiest thing for her kidneys to cope with, and is best at keeping her hydrated. I must remember to tell him he's talking bollocks next time we meet.

Best go and have a wee, then rehydrate myself before there's an unfortunate accident.

Organic pure orange juice is also full of CHEMICALS. Just saying like...

They are idiots. Juice is basically sugar water anyway.

If someone invited you round for a meal unless you had a VERY good reason (ie not just because you thought the food would be cheap shit you wouldn't buy) you surely wouldn't take your own food/drink. It would be weird and rude. The same goes for kids.

I would eat at someone's house if they served me cheap shit. Cheap food doesn't have to be shit food.

wouldn't eat must remember to check posts.

"I think most people can tell the dfferences between kids with allergies (a small minority) and those with PFB mummees (far too common), its the way the mother behaves that sets teeth on edge in my experience."

And there are loadsof people who don't know then difference between causation and correlation.

Allergies are one thing - unless there's a very good reason bringing your own stuff to a party is just plain rude.

This thread has reminded me of being informed by ex that my Nestle boycott would have to take a back seat when his parents visited because his mum 'only drinks Nescafe'. Bollocks to that.

Seasons you might turn up expecting something good quality and end up being served a value ready meal. Surely politeness would dictate that you would pick at it or pretend not to be hungry rather than pull your own reserve meal out of your bag? The same should go for kids imo - once they are over the baby stage they aren't going to starve/dehydrate if they don't like what's on offer at a party.

Haha just spotted the thread about the ready meal - off to read!

True but I wouldn't bring an organic replacement, I'd have suggested they had water and I probably did that till they were around 5 years old. To limit the amount of crap eaten, we give them a meal before a party to fill them up on good stuff so they don't have room for all the nasties.

My in laws cook awful food - giblet pie, boiled fish and cheap ready meals, so when we stay I bring my own food and cook for everyone - they seem very relieved as they hate cooking and love my food and seem genuinely excited about what's on the menu...I considered it a gift rather than rudeness. Maybe I'm out of step.

Someone turning up with food and cooking for everyone I wouldn't consider rude at all. I would be delighted. Ditto people bringing wine to share.

I do still think it's a little excessive to deny a child a glass of squash at a party. It's not a time for health food imo. If the child asks for water because they don't like squash then fair enough but if it was the parent dictating that they weren't allowed any I would consider it a tad pfb.

I've never been ashamed of my pfb tendencies over food...very small children should not eat crap - once might not kill them - you could say that about a lot of things but it's not how I choose to make parenting decisions.

I haven't read enough to find out what age the DC was-I presume she is young. The mother can get away with it until about 5yrs (6 yrs at a push) and then it will cause problems.

Anyone who fusses about party food, as an occasional thing, is going to end up with problems, but probably they won't know as the DC will be very good at being secretive-looking mother straight in the eye with 'of course I don't like crisps' when everyone else knows they are stuffing them down as soon as they get the chance!

Well we obviously parent differently. My feeling is that birthdays should be fun. As long as my kids don't make themselves sick they can eat what they like. As I said they have a very healthy diet day to day and are healthy weights with perfect teeth. Parties should be a treat imo.

I agree RomanChristingle! Adults eat out for special occasions-otherwise goodness knows why restaurants and chefs bother! Food isn't just a fuel, it is supposed to be enjoyable, sociable and fun. DCs are no different. Some parents would turn birthdays into joyless carrot sticks and rice cake events and then be really upset if they went to a dinner party and got the same!

If you eat a healthy diet as a family you really don't need to worry about the odd occasion when you don't and the odd glass of squash doesn't matter.Anyone can ask for water instead. Taking your own juice is OTT and I wouldn't want to give a young DC much juice anyway-organic or not.

"To limit the amount of crap eaten, we give them a meal before a party to fill them up on good stuff so they don't have room for all the nasties."

In my experience they find room! And then they've eaten too much- which is a problem in itself. And labelling any food a "nasty" is sending a bad message too. IMHO.

DD would be exactly the same seeker and so am I! There is always room for sweets and cake

And I can be completely hydrated and still have space for wine!

exoticfruits I once went to a dinner party and the host announced that they had gone 'macrobiotic' as an experiment.
Food was the worst, most joyless experience of my life. Good analogy re ricecakes at kids' parties!

I have been to one too GreyGardens -it contained seaweed, was very heavy and tasteless and there was no alcohol.

I wish I had £1 for every DC that I have known whose mother thinks they don't eat the foods that have been made so desirable by being labelled 'bad'-I would be rich!