To resent my husband for not making enough money?

[Mummy252]

I'm on maternity leave with our first baby, love being a mummy so much and I do love my husband to bits but I am also feeling very resentful towards him.
We've been together 10yrs since we were very young, he's from a good family and works for the family business, has since we met. His family are financially comfortable, mums a "lady that lunches" and has never worked.
We always planned for me to work but also wanted a family. With the recession etc his business isn't doing too well but it hasn't stopped his parents going on 6 holidays a year whilst he continues to work 6/7 days a week and earns half what I do. A lot if the income is from dividends and his dad and grandparents still own 90% of the shares, he has 3%. He says there's nothing they can do its hard for all of them but I am hugely resentful that I'm having to go back to work full time and leave my gorgeous baby because his parents won't give him a fair share of the business. His mum saw all her children grow up, I'm happy to work and understand this recession has hit lots of ppl but I just feel cheated because I always expected him to at least match what I earned,not have me as the major breadwinner. I want to be a mummy like we always planned and ideally go back 3 days a week but I can't because of our financial situation.
He doesn't see why it upsets me because he works 50-60 hour weeks and has about 3 weeks holiday a year whereas I'm a teacher get long holidays etc. he does work very hard but financially he isn't bringing in anything like we expected so I feel a lot of the financial burden has fallen to me.
I know we live in an equal society but I want to be a mummy, I don't want equality, I want time with my little baby!

This man earns half a teacher's salary for working 60 hours a week. he is silly. The real answer is that he is going to do 24/7 child care and give up work. That's the best solution. When sunny Jim realises that you will be forcing him to be the nanny he will persuade his parents to double his pay and even if he doesn't you will have a much better life with him at home.

What Xenia said. Sorted :)

Sunny Jim

Op, as others have said, I would definitely tell your DH not to any assumptions about gaining a greater share in the business or inheriting it at some point in the future. A friend of mine worked for his parents' building firm for years, earning a very low wage whilst they semi-retired and left him to get on with it. He eventually asked to be made a partner, and they were outraged that he expected a share in the business that they had built, ignoring the fact that it only existed because he had been running it single-handedly for the previous 8 years. They also told him that they fully intended to sell it to fund their retirement, which was their right, though it would have been kinder to tell him that during all his years on a miserable wage, rather than stringing him along with vague hints of "all this will be yours at some future point". He set up his own business, is doing very well and can now afford a mortgage and 4 children! He doesn't see much of his parents any more.

By the way, your DH is being a bit of an arse about your finances isn't he? Probably thinks maintaining the status quo is preferable to having a conversation with his parents about money.

I would endorse whatn wineandr says with another example. I forget who told me. Her husband's famly are very very wealthy, probably worth £20m. Her husband is paid about £20k a year working in the family business. They are now divorcing. He has no shares in the business. On paper she is better off than he is and she bought most of their house before they married. On divorce he gets a good part of the house. She gets not a penny of the business asn none of it is in his name even though the reality is that they keep the salaries of all their sons low to protect family assets from divorcing wives and to ensure the sons do as they are told and tow the line in the business on some vague promise of inheritance.