To be finding this decision so hard?? And WWYD?

[IWillOnlyEatBeans]

Currently live in London with DH and DS (21 months)

DH's parents live in Shropshire - about an hr away from Birmingham.
My parents live in the NE - between Sunderland and Newcastle.

DH and I are both really keen to move out of London. I am a SAHM and we are struggling to live comfortably on DH's wage. We would also like to be closer to family.

DH's employers have said that he can move to one of their other offices - options are Sheffield, Coventry or Darlington. Brilliant.

However we are finding it almost impossible to decide where to go and I have no idea whether IABU...

So here goes:

Option 1: Move to Sheffield. Approx half way between both sets of parents, but not close enough to either to have any practical help (both sets of parents are super-keen to help out as much as they can).

Option 2: Move to somewhere near Coventry. DH's parents would then move somewhere near by, so could provide childcare if/when needed. DH's parents do want to move (downsize) and have been holding off on doing so until we have decided where to settle - so they can either be closer to us, or closer to a motorway to provide easy access (currently live in little village in middle of nowhere). DS is their only grandchild.

Option 3: move to Durham - a 30 min commute to Darlington and 30 mins away from my parents. Obv this is my preferred option. My parents have 2 other grandchildren (so are already helping out with school runs etc) and are older than my ILs (Dad is 70, Mum is 68).

So - my DH thinks we should go with option 2. His main arguments being that his parents will be able to help out more (fewer other commitments, younger). He also sees it as 'cruel' to move their only grandchild further away from them.

I would soooo much prefer option 3. But my argument is less sensible/alturistic and much more selfish - I have wanted to move back up north for YEARS (DH fully aware of this and always supportive up until now) as I miss my family terribly. My sisters and nephews would all be close by.

So IABU in expecting my (admittedly selfish) arguments to carry as much weight as DH's sensible/practical ones? Or do I just have to accept that he is right and just get on with it? Either way I know I'll be in a much better position (financially and practically) than we are now.

DH and I have never really disagreed on anything before!

WWYD?

And thanks for reading this far, my posts on here always seem to be essays!

and sausage...

and err I bet you don't even have a west mids accent duck :o

Lived near Darlington - hated it. Lived near Sheffield also hated it. Live near Coventry (studied there and work there) I love it. For all of those saying Durham lovely (it is - but there are some equally grotty bits too (remembers Darlo)). Coventry can be grim but South Warwickshire is beautiful.

Main point to all this is you go where you will be happiest - When we lived up North I was miserable because I am a Midlands girl and even though OHs family in Yorkshire I was still homesick (we have always had paid childcare not family so that was not a deciding factor). So after 15 years I was so homesick that we relocated here - and several years later am very happy. Some fantastic schools here as well.

There are pros/cons to all choices - you might be best drawing up a list and seeing if you can come to a joint decision

Roger I miss cannock chase too, but because I'm tragically unfit at the moment and would be a hazard to myself and others if I threw myself down Follow The Dog

I do and I know thats its always up Hanley duck (even though its down from where I live )

People from Stoke are quite lovely.

Vivi, you need to go a nice slow small walk somewhere flat like Marquis drive and build yourself up :)

Will be back later to discuss WM.