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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Surestart centre giving whole grapes to babies and toddlers

161 replies

delicioso · 17/11/2011 17:44

I've been to my local surestart centre a few times and they often have a snack table.

Sometimes there's a formal snack time and other times the table is just left ouf for children to help themselves.

They often serve whole grapes as a snack - I know they maybe don't have time to cut the grapes up but I have a friend who is a paediatric nurse and has seen more than one fatality in children who have choked on grapes

I'm probably going to be told IABU because it's the parents responsibility to cut them up. I do bite them half for my 15 month old, but today as I was sitting with her distracted talking to someone the surestart lady held out the bowl of grapes to her and she took one and started eating it and I had to fish it out of her mouth.

Lots of the parents don't sit up with the children at snack time and I guess I just think it's a bit dangerous if one of the little ones chokes on one. I just wonder why they don't serve something else instead if they aren't going to cut up the grapes.

OP posts:

Homelybird · 18/11/2011 00:05

Ok ashamed to say I did not realise the importance of cutting a grape in half, although most of the time i do. Until I read this thread and the article in it I did not realise why grapes were particularly hazardous, I thought a child was just as likely to choke on any food. So I am pleased that you posted this op.

Out of interest what age is safe to stop chopping them up? dd1 (3) eats whole grapes (the whole pack if she could!)

Bakelitebelle · 18/11/2011 00:12

A lot of sarcastic replies on here despite other threads on the hazards of grapes. They are a well-known choking hazard. Cut them up and stop being rude to the op.

TheFrogs · 18/11/2011 00:19

Exactly bake, it takes seconds. Why even risk it....

IneedAbetterNickname · 18/11/2011 00:22

I never cut grapes (or peeled/sliced apples) for my DC, but that's me and I know other people do, each to their own! When DC were younger I supervised them very closely if they were eating grapes (apples etc). But with the sure start centre I can see both sides.

I personally wouldn't have let DC help themselves, I'd have taken a few grapes for them, or for an 'organised snack time' I'd have stood/sat with them iyswim. Plus do grapes dry out once sliced? (Honest qs, like I said, I don't slice them)

But then again, a parent would only have to turn their back for a second for their child to help themself and choke.

I agree that you should bring it up with the group leader. Maybe there is a reason they don't cut them? No idea what it could be, but who knows!

LoveBeingAFirework · 18/11/2011 00:30

Op in your centre there should be a poster re who to make complaints too. The name/s on there will cover all the centres in your area.

Might have been quicker/easier to ask why they aren't cut/to cut them in future tbh

TheFrogs · 18/11/2011 00:37

At the risk of sounding a complete arse, supervising in my opinion doesn't make a difference. As an adult i've nearly choked on things..put food in my mouth, maybe coughed and it gets stuck! A grape is just the right size and shape to get stuck in a little one...they can be the most sensible eater, shit happens....why not minimise that risk by cutting the grapes up. (or if you're a manky bugger like me stick a fingernail in them and rip)

IneedAbetterNickname · 18/11/2011 00:41

TheFrogs I know, so I am aware my logic isn't logical but there we are! Thankfully for me, my DC have never choked! Like I said, each to their own!

squeakytoy · 18/11/2011 01:10

I can understand the need to cut up food for babies and small toddlers, but it is when you get parents cutting grapes in half for their 7 year olds that it gets a bit silly.

Morloth · 18/11/2011 01:13

I am a very slack mother but even I know to cut up grapes.

Not everyone knows how dangerous they can be I think, as they are such a standard kid food. I often find myself at places cutting grapes in half because it worries me.

Say something to the people in charge and if you are there and they are still whole, cut them up yourself, these are not mutually exclusive actions.

hazeyjane · 18/11/2011 01:23

I am surprised that they didn't cut them up as our local one is very health and safety conscious.

Mind you I went to a surestart session for children with sn recently, where 1 child was fed by feeding tube, and the other 3 were only able to eat bite and dissolve foods, but because they have a healthy eating policy, the food they provided at snacktime was orange and apple segments, which none of the children could eat!

Feminine · 18/11/2011 03:26

squeaky its not "silly" for a Mum (to do it) for as long as she sees fit surely?

Some kids are crazy eaters, bounce around even when seated.

7 is still young.

Older kids choke on all kinds of things...

I nearly finished myself off with a tic-tac!

CheerfulYank · 18/11/2011 03:46

They should definitely be cut up.

I am not at all a "careful! careful!" kind of parent, but I have always chopped grapes and hotdogs.

troisgarcons · 18/11/2011 06:05

Teeth are for cutting grapes up with. An old fashioned view I know.

I love the anecdotal 'my friend is a paediatric nurse' type posts - they see a lot of things in hospitals. Once or twice. My friend is a triage nurse and had to retrieve a light bulb out of someones bottom but I don't think light bulbs should be banned, neither do I think there should be a nationwide campaign to rise awareness of the dangers of putting lightulbs up bottoms either. I'm sure someone will be along shortly to tell me this is infact a major problem up and down the country and lightbulbs are in fact a danger to us all and should be banned.

nooka · 18/11/2011 06:56

i never cut up grapes for my children and as my mother never commented I don't suppose she did either. Neither her nor my grandmother would have served hotdogs (were they ever around in the UK in the 1930s?)

Grapes are a choking risk for small children, but they aren't a very high risk. Here is a good response to a scare in the US about hot dogs: stats.org/stories/2010/choking_hot_dog_feb23_10.html I couldn't find any UK stats but I can't see why they wouldn't be comparable. Of course any death from a preventable cause is a death too many, but life is full of risk and it can't all be countered.

My view is that the SureStart centre were not being irresponsible, and that if the OP had wanted to persuade the staff to cut up grapes then she really didn't go about it in the right way. I'm not sure I would have reacted quite as strongly as Hecate, but if it had been me I would have thought the OP rude and probably been defensive. Surely it would have been better to say 'I'm sure you didn't realise but grapes can be a choking hazard for babies'

Many things are choking hazards, inlcuding apples and carrots, which are also commonly served to small children.

nooka · 18/11/2011 06:58

troisgarcon, I see your triage nurse and raise you stories from radiography hot reporting. The things people stick into themselves and the reasons they give are truly very bizarre (so many things you can 'just sit on'!)

OhDoAdmit · 18/11/2011 11:19

trois grapes are particularly dangerous because of their shape, size and texture. They are very difficult to get out once they are in.

Children also tend to be greedy with them because they like them so much.

I am really not a precious mamma. Not at all.

But I always, always cut them up and feel so strongly about it that I told my OH we were not going to get them anymore unless he was more careful.

As I said before I cannot break confidentality but sometimes I wish I could because I can pretty much guarentee that even the most dismissive of us would be reaching for a knife.

I dont rush my kids to A&E if they fall over, I dont use a helmet for my toddler when he is riding his scooter in the garden, I dont worry about my kids going out in the sun for half an hour etc.

But I will always cut up grapes.

Feminine · 18/11/2011 12:41

trois your comparison is totally silly...

As adults we work to lessen situations that could be dangerous for little ones.

what the hell has a light bulb fetish got do do with it?

There are posters here who have dealt with chocking situations, lets not be so patronizing and maybe (perhaps) learn from them.

wahwahwah · 18/11/2011 12:43

I cut them up when DS was little after reading an article in the Sunday Times magazine about a toddler who choked on one and suffered massive brain damage as a result. You can't pull the buggers out if they get lodged.

WinterIsComing · 18/11/2011 12:53

I'm the same about grapes. And this is also why you should never give them to a child in a supermarket

Thinkingof4 · 18/11/2011 13:01

I agree about chopping them too. A local girl choked on grape and died in GP surgery- they couldn't get it out, so sad.
Out of interest do people cut them in half through the middle or from top to bottom? I cut through middle but it does still leave a circular shape perfect to block a windpipe - maybe longways would be safer

WinterIsComing · 18/11/2011 13:09

I cut them the way you would parboiled potatoes leaving angular rather than smooth surfaces but we tend to buy big grapes which need a few chops.

Frozen grapes are lovely too.

StealthPolarBear · 18/11/2011 13:58

I cut lengthways and try not to be neat, so leave angles and spaces

Thinkingof4 · 18/11/2011 14:05

Thanks!
I might start cutting diagonally or into quarters! My baby is nearly 6 months and will be starting weaning soon so I will be cutting carefully.
My 2 year old loves grapes but I tend not to cut for him now but perhaps I still should be

Gargula · 18/11/2011 14:41

Another YANBU here. Personally I always cut grapes for my DD (19 months), but haven't done so for my son for about a year (since he was 3).
My DS's preschool (catering for children between 2-5) insisted on cut up grapes in lunchboxes as they are a serious choke risk.
I think OP may be long gone but I would raise politely with SureStart centre, I'm sure they will be more than happy to chop the grapes or just not serve them (better that than a child choking to death).

Sleepyspaniel · 18/11/2011 14:54

YADNBU!

ANYONE who is on this thread scoffing, saying "what's wrong with a whole grape oh you are being PFB" Please simply Google

Toddler choked on grape

There's your answer(s).

VVVVVVVV Dangerous.

They get swallowed whole and stuck in the windpipe. They are near impossible to fish out.

Cut grapes have an "edge" and do not (often) get swallowed whole.

Sorry if this has already been said upthread.

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