AIBU or is this teacher being very unprofessional?

[UnprofessionalTeacher]

Have name changed for this incase I get flamed for being so inconsiderate, etc. Can't take a pasting atm. Am not a troll, poos in memorable places, mile for Maude, Cod, etc.

DD is in Yr 1. She's in a class which emcompasses reception, and Yrs 1-2. Obviously a small school, but class is fairly big due to different years.

DD's teacher has a daughter who started at reception in a different primary school in Sept. This primary school only did half days for first month. So every afternoon the teacher's DD would be dropped off at school and spend the afternoon in the classroom with her mum while her mum worked.

Now this other primary school isn't far away and finishes 30 minutes earlier. A friend of the teacher's picks this girl up and drops her off with her mum every day. IE; with my daughter's teacher in the classroom for the last 20-25 minutes of the day. Now according to dd and a couple of older kids there is a fair amount of the last 20 minutes of the day spent with the teacher having her attention focused on her DD, listening to what she did in school, etc.

So one of my friends has written to the headmaster asking if he's aware of what's happening and that parents aren't happy. He's written a letter back saying as far as he's concerned it can carry on. The letter is snotty and states that he would rather have this arrangement and have his staff happy than have them pulling sickies all the time. Direct quote.

I can't believe how unprofessional it is. Its maybe not the worst thing in the world but its 20 minutes a day for the next few years where the teacher isn't focused. Not good enough in my book.

It wouldn't bother me at all. I agree with all of the posters who say it's lovely that the school/head is willing to be accommodating like this. We should all embrace the concept of a more child friendly country!!

I think there are an awful lot of sour grapes on this thread.

This does sound very petty and mean-spirited of the OP.

A whole 20 minutes! Heavens!

When DH was 3, his mum got a new teaching job and couldn't get suitable childcare. She rang the HT in desperation and was told to just bring him along. DH spent a very happy time right up until he went to school, visiting the various classes and being petted by children and teachers alike. At playtime, he joined the rest in the playground. No-one batted an eyelid.

This poor woman has her daughter join her for just 20 minutes a day and the school gets complaints and grumbling from miseries who can't bear the thought that she might be getting (gasp!) free childcare! I'm not surprised they were so short with the OP. I think I would be in their place, too.

But pupils are missing out on an hour and a half of education ^a week! Imagine the times tables that could be chanted, the verbs conjugated, the colouring in mastered!

LMAO! Of course they're not.

Some of the 'older kids'...who would at most be just 7yrs old have said "there is a fair amount of the last 20 minutes of the day spent with the teacher having her attention focused on her DD, listening to what she did in school, etc."

Given that the child had literally been in her own school just 10 minutes before that (I'd be surprised if she did spend 20 whole mins in the class) and given that no-one has asked these children what they see as 'a fair amount of 20 minutes'

I think it's a total non issue and the Head obviously sees the good in helping staff out.

ha ha TWF, good point

This wouldn't bother me at all.

It has just reminded me of a lovely memory. About 30years ago my DM worked in Beatties and when I was on school holidays I used to sit in the changing rooms with all my toys whilst DM served on the till. She would come in and play with me whenever it was quiet. Fantastic memory, especially as she died 20years ago. Can't believe I'd forgotten!

Sorry that was slightly off topic

it does sound unprofessional, but it sound social and community-minded.. not everything in life should be professional in my opinion.

it sounds like you're in a VERY small community (if you have three years in one class) so i would hope that there would be understanding and give-and-take in such a community.

so long as the school is also flexible with parents/children then i think that a bit of flexibility with teachers/staff is good.

Worra I think Norman was being sarcastic! That's how I read it anyway.

LOL at colouring in mastered .

I'll have to expand on my ealier point about contacting the Governors. IF (and I do mean IF) having the extra dc takes the 'fairly big' class over the 30 allowed by the ICS regulations, then I WOULD write to the Governors - they are not allowed to admit an extra dc to the class if it takes it over 30, so this could, surely, be used by someone appealing to get into the school about how it cannot predjudice the education of the other children in the class if there is an extra dc over the 30 already for 2.5 hrs a week...and I wouldn't be happy if it DID take the class over the ICS regs.

BUT if the teacher's dc makes the class 30 (if there is 29 in the class to start with), then I wouldn't have a problem, as most infant classes DO run at the full 30.

So it really would depend, to me, how many dc were in the 'fairly big' class to start with. 29 or less, not a problem. 30 (or more) in the class without teachers DC, BIG problem IMO.

I think we might be talking/discussing a bit at cross purposes here. Obviously in itself, the concept of whether a teacher might bring another child into her class for 20 minutes can be both ok and not ok. That was why I asked the OP for more info - is this a state school or a private school? And it is worth knowing whether this is a small village school where the local population is tiny, or in a big town or crowded suburb.
Here's the thing, if you're in a tiny remote village far away from the next one, there aren't really ever likely to be that many children so having an extra child in a tiny class isn't ever likely to exceed numbers or result in the small number of pupils being neglected. However the point about whether the teacher could be unbiased in the case of a fire/flood/crisis is a good point though.
On the other hand.....
1)In some private schools, if you're 15 minutes late or more picking up your child (even in mitigating circumstances) they inform you in advance that they will charge you the fee normally charged for the after school club (even if the child hasn't been given any club activities to take part in). Some state schools do this too. So twenty minutes for another child may be in this case taking advantage - why isn't the teacher being charged for the care too? Of course if this school doesn't charge anything and is fairly easy going about pickup times, then it's a different matter.
2)Many mums/parents end up doing 6 school run trips a day. 2 trips there and back in the morning to drop children off. 2 trips there and back at lunchtime for the younger child who only has a half day. 2 trips there and back to pick up older child/children. Some mothers have had to give up work or change to a much lower paying job to accommodate this if they aren't able to find childcare for those periods. If their older child was in the OP's class, could they not say, why I can't I drop my younger child off there to be with their sibling? After all, the teacher is doing it, so why can't I? I too need to work, just like the teacher does. Of course, I presume nobody has asked, but it's the principle, isn't it?

Presumably the reason why reception age children don't do any learning for the last 30 mins of each lesson is because it is actually quite a big deal for a class of 4 and 5 year olds to get changed into coats, hats etc, tidy everything away, tell the teacher something has upset them (and maybe something important at home is what has upset them), get excited, get disrupted by going home from school, need the loo, lose their glove and on and on. And presumably all of that requires a lot of adult attention from the teacher. Otherwise, all of that could be condensed into two minutes before the bell goes.

And presumably it is also quite a big deal for a young child to see their Mum after school and tell her stuff, and sometimes she might come back from school upset about something and really want to tell her Mum that something. So 20 mins a day is actually a lot more disruptive than a whole day once every now and then because of the other school having different holidays and different teaching days. I would think a whole day occasionally was okay, but 20 mins at the end of every day?

I can't see how it is a good thing. As for it being about a sense of community, it isn't. It is about the staff. I doubt the parents of the children who actually attend that school are being offered the option to pick up children early (at the beginning of this half hour when supposedly nothing is learnt), pick children up late, wait inside school if they arrive early and so on. What would aid a sense of community would be for everyone to have adequate childcare available and for people not to have make these kinds of arrangements.

But people have done this for decades. One of the staff at work used to use her lunch hour to pick DD and DS up and they would sit and draw or play solitaire on computer until 5.30pm. They were no trouble.

I'm sure her dd comes in she says hello did you have a good day and the. Dd sits down and teacher gets on with those last vital 20 mins.

I just think it's a bit tight to get all snotty about this arrangement. Am sure HT has laid ground rules and he/she is able to trust the teacher to get done what she needs to.

The teacher should immediately solve this issue by having her DD enrolled in the school

I don't think posts about how teachers used to bring their children in many years ago are helpful. This isn't acceptable now and she needs to sort her childcare out. As a one off emergency type situation, mist heads I have worked for would accept a teacher's child on school but not as a daily childcare arrangement

I would love to know what this teacher is planning to do when Ofsted are in - I can't imagine them being impressed.

Why isn't it acceptable now?

MillyR - you don't know that those sort of things don't go on - maybe they do. Maybe the head is really flexible on those sorts of things rather than adhere to often ridiculous rules and such.

And yes it's about the staff - is that such a bad thing? Staff who feel valued tend to stay in their jobs. Maybe this teacher is a really fantastic teacher. I think I would rather have the benefit of this teacher teaching my children even if it means an extra child in the class at the end of the day.

As for Ofsted...well I'm parent governor and sometimes I feel like sticking 2 fingers up at Ofsted. The hoops schools have to jump through to do well for Ofsted are ridiculous and the time spent on all the frills could be spent improving teaching. I've seen 2 Ofsted inspections whilst my dds have been at their primary school and you know what...I don't CARE what Ofsted think - I can see my children are being well taught and that's what matters.

My mum was a school doctor (back in the days when such things existed) who was based in a clinic and also ran baby clinics (back when such things existed) etc. She had a nanny but when the nanny was off sick/ on holiday leave, and later when we were all older if one of us was ill, she used to take us to work and make us sit in the clinic waiting room all day with a book, and instructions to go to the secretary if we had any problems! When I was younger I didn't mind but by the age of 8 or 9 I had begun to find it embarrassing - later she left us home alone watching the 3 Betamax videos in rotation... when we were ill and she or my dad would go home at lunch time to check on us...

I think it used to be more normal 30 years ago for people to wing it with one off childcare but is not normal these days! When I briefly returned to teaching after having my first baby my head let me know it "sent the wrong message" that I left school soon after the children were picked up on days with no meetings or other after school commitments, in order to pick dd up from nursery. She did have a place til 5pm but I preferred to actually see her awake rather than pick her up, stuff tea into her, bath, bed... I got my marking and prep done after she was in bed but it was appearances the head was concerned about! (He was a d*ck though...)

Don't think the circumstance the OP describes would be allowed in many schools, maybe she is a really great teacher and the head is afraid he would lose her otherwise?

Every school I've worked in has made it clear that work and personal life must be kept separate.

In the words of my current headteacher "it's not about you, it's never about you, it will always be about the children at this school"

I'm just wondering why the teacher does simply have her DD at her own school then there wouldn't be an issue. Do we know why not OP?

Right I'm back. Thanks for all the comments. Have taken them onboard and decided not to worry about this anymore. I do still feel the teacher is being unprofessional but have accepted that in the last 20 mins of the day maybe not much teaching takes place.

To answer various questions.

It's a small state, village primary. I have no idea why the teacher doesn't have her dd at this school. Though teacher has just announced she's pregnant so maybe isn't intending to come back after this one and wanted her child nearer her home? The teacher,s dd was at full time childcare of some description prior to this year but it was a nursery. I'm guessing teacher maybe thought it wasn't going to be worth getting a childminder for six months or so before she went off on maternity leave. There are definetly childminders with spaces available.

I presume that as the Reception, Y1 & Y2 are all in one class, that it's the only Reception class, which would mean her DD would be in her class if she went to the same school and she probably thought that wasn't ideal for them.

I'm glad you have decided to let this go - now you just need to share your newfound zen with the others :)

Op-YANBU it is her place of work and if I were you a letter would br winging its way to the governors

OP - I think you're doing the right thing. Different if there a clear detriment to your child but doesn't really sound like it so far.

Chipping - you're probably right that the teacher doesn't want to be either be teaching her own child for the whole of KS1. Or (if the she swapped classes with the KS2 teacher) all the kids would effectively be having the same teacher for the whole of primary school. Can see that's not ideal now I think about it.

shoobydoowop - that is EXACTLY what is going wrong for schools these days with parents with nothing else better to do than snoop around finding things to complain about and writing to the governors about total non-issues.

Good luck to the teacher if the head has agreed to this arrangement. It's hardly going to affect the education of the other children in the long term (or even the short term).

Good God what is the world coming to that you would be up in arms about something so trivial? YABU