To expect my neighbour to stop feeding my cat?

[BoysBoysBoysAndMe]

The situation is trivial but I'm losing patience really.

We have had our puss for over 10 years, since he was a kitten. We brought him and another cat back from Cyprus where we used to live for a while. We have lived on the same street now for 8 years to and never had a problem.

A middle aged couple 6 doors down has started letting my cat in to their house, feeding him, keeping him in overnight and not putting him out. They have bought him a bed, put a new collar on him. We have asked them to stop letting him in but they keep doing it.

They smoke in the house so we know when he's been round there coz he stinks. Last night the lady brought him to us (we thought he was in the house somewhere) and she had sprayed him with perfume!!

How can I stop them letting him in to their house and feeding him?

Tried keeping him in but he gets sad, and I think that's mean anyway. I'm assuming he's going to the house for the peace and quiet he doesn't get here, but I begrudge them keeping him in and feeding him.

Anyone had this before?

I can't believe the number of people who claim cats just keep coming in their houses!?!

We are an asthmatic/allergic family and I'd be livid if some cat just pushed past into my home. I think they can tell, so they don't. In fact our neighbours cats stare through the windows a lot (previous owners used to let them in) but I taped up the cat flap and thy just stare mournfully at me.

I don't believe people who say it comes in and is unwanted. If you havent enticed it in (cat thief) your options are to chase it out, or put it in a box and return it to owner (asking them to lock it up if it's unable to stay out of your house.

No one should have to put up with unwanted animals in their house, and I don't realistically think they would, unless they are trying to steal it

Obviously people who have other cats and leave a cat flap open and food on the floor is slightly different...

not sure if you can call the police, tbh. Is it technically theft?

But I do understand your frustration as we have similar situation with our very friendly tom who adores anyone and everyone. One of my neighbours (who is also a friend which makes it more difficult to tackle IMO) lets him in, feeds him etc despite me asking them not to. She is also quick with the snide remarks: "oooh he is always so thirsty" "well perhaps it's because we allow him all over the furniture" . We almost fell out good and proper when I kicked up a fuss last year. Particularly when my poor DCs were in tears sat looking out of our window at their cat being played with by her grandchildren on the window ledge of her sitting room. It makes me very sad and angry too. I understand cats are independent but, you know what? If they want a pet that badly then go out and give a rescue animal a home

I just looked it up. According to the Cats Protection League it is classed as theft.

www.cats.org.uk/uploads/documents/cat_care_leaflets/EG10-Catsandthelaw.pdf

Just had a thought - isn't spraying perfume on your cat very dangerous? Perfumes are made up of chemicals that could cause an allergic reaction. I'd bring that up with your neighbour urgently if I were you. Never mind telling her a white lie about how they are damaging his health - she actually is!

Maybe the perfume was to hide the cigarette smell?

My neighbour has done this too. I have a cat who must be about 12 now, we had her from a kitten and she's very loving but has always been quite timid. Over the years we've had other kittens and although initially lady cat hates them, she does come round. Two years ago we bought a new kitten and lady cat did her normal disappearing act but this time she didn't come back.

Neighbour told me she was feeding her as she "felt sorry" for her. I explained the situation and asked her not to, told her the cat would come back when she was hungry and get used to the kitten in time.

Neighbour ignored me and continues to feed her. But the best is, neighbour is allergic to cats and wont let her in the house! She is living under a tree in neighbour's garden and it's going to get pretty cold soon. The only thing I can think of is to try and rehome the cat which is heartbreaking but seems the kindest thing to do....she wont come home while she's being fed there

I have lost three cats this way.

All neutered, chipped, well fed, vaccinated, well looked after.
None looked remotely like strays.

I wish people who fed cats that do not belong to them would stop and think of the consquences.

Gracie123 we genuinely did have our neighbours' cats barging in unwanted. We removed them from the house countless times. One cat used to sit on my laptop keyboard whilst I tried to work from home, I used to pick her off and remove her from the house. Thirty seconds later, she'd be back. In a hot summer, you leave doors and windows open, don't you? Which it was, the first year we lived in that house.

It turned out that the previous owners of our house had let the cats pretty much live there (as their actual owners, who were lovely people, had been given the cats as a present, but weren't interested) so the cats regarded it as their home.

The cats persisted and eventually wore us down. I am asthmatic but used to have a cat at home as a child and grow accustomed to their fur over time.

When we finally offered to adopt them, the relief from the neighbours was palpable. As I said in an earlier post, the cats hadn't been immunised or given flea treatments for years, and were not litter trained. We paid a fortune to get everything up to date. One of the cats then needed a load of dental treatment, also not cheap.

But I think I am the exception that proves the rule!

We too have a cat that after about two months of sleeping rough at the side of our house decided he wanted to move in. He is the size of a small tiger- and once he decided to come in and stay there was no stopping him!
Once in, I actually recognised him (strange markings) and I was able to contact the owners who told me they thought he had 'gone away to die' Apparently cats often do this? Anyway it turned out they had inherited the cat with the house and although had fed and cared for him, they were not actually 'cat people' so asked if we would like to keep him.
Mind you, he costs us about £10 a week in food alone - so no wonder they let us keep him!

I have several cats of my own and would be very cross if someone enticed them away. Having said that cats make up their own minds where they want to be, that's why I like them I acquired our former neighbours cat after the little bugger kept coming in through the cat flap and clearing out our cats food. I'd put him out and he'd instantly come back. I paid him virtually no attention - he was rather manky and old tbh. After 3 years I gave up. I remember the neighbour saying "oh we haven't seen Manky Cat for 3 days, he must have died", to which I replied "He's on my bed, I'll just get him". They then told us they were moving, so I was expecting to have a conversation about Manky Cat at some point and they pissed off without a word. Manky Cat lived for another 6 years and ruined 3 carpets.

PMSL at 'manky cat'

That is what we used to call the only cat I have fed (apart from mine) Manky Cat. He really was manky and used to come to the door in the evenings.

He was lovely but v.v.manky. bless.

You're very restrained, I'd be going bonkers at them.

This happened to my grandparents.

I ended up with going to their door, with the police, to get him back. At first they refused to hand him over, stating that he was their cat. This was quickly dismissed as he had a distinctive mark on his paw pad that they knew nothing about.

He died later that evening.

My gps have never forgiven the neighbours for this, especially as they had lied to my gf about him being in the house.

well I have just let the cats out, one cat is still upstairs, the other one went straight to next door neighbours door and started meowing, I instantly regretted the decision and now I cant catch him

and neighbour has obviously just found him as she sounds like she is having a g iddy fit over him.

I've had this self same situation years back -

Many years back, a lady with a young Daughter, whose garden backed onto mine took a fancy to my old Chinchilla Persian & was doing all you mention & more - on confronting her myself I was pretty much told I was too young to look after him properly & as they were feeding him regularly he was now their cat - I was in my early 20s at the time & she made it very clear that as she didn't like the way we looked we obviously weren't responsible enough to own a cat

Ended up with my speaking to the Police, taking early photos etc of the Cat with me as proof of ownership - they were surprisingly helpful :) that & a solicitors letter mentioning theft finally sorted the problem out

good luck I remember too well how bloody annoying the cheeky mare was

Pets at Home sell collars with 'Please Dont Feed Me' on them.
It wont stop the really determined cat napper but if a cat is wearing one it may help your case with the Police because the feeder cant say they didnt know the cat was owned.

Two of my stolen cats were Che and Fidel.

Both lovely. One black one silver tabby.

Che went first. Ages later a distressed lady came to the door full of apologies because she had just taken 'her' cat to the vet and found he was chipped. She said she had thought he was a stray so had taken him in. She had named him Barney because that was the name of her last cat who happened to look exactly like my Che

He clearly was NOT a stray. She saw him, he looked like her cat so she nicked him. She was not able to kid herself any longer when she took him to the vets and realised that he came from 4 doors down and belonged to the lady whose DD had died.

She wasnt a bad person but she had convinced herself that this cat was hers until faced with the truth and felt guilty.

What could I do? He didnt want to live with us in our noisy house with dogs and cats and kids. He liked it at the old lady's house where he was fed on chicken and slept in his own room.

So I signed his papers over to her.

I dont know who has Fidel and Ishmail. I loved those cats. Ishmail got panluekopaenia when he was teeeny (parvo for cats) and we spent £100s getting him well and nursing him back to health. Fidel was a very beautiful cat.

They had all been looked after and had everything done that costs the money and takes the time. Only for some selfish twat to steal them.

Pisses me right off.

The most annoying thing for me is that we have asked them not to let Begbie in and certainly not feed him, to which her reply was,"Well I'm not being funny but if he's meowing outside the door I'm going to let him in!!"

If they hadn't let him in originally he wouldn't go round there. He's obviously not a stray. He's a gorgeous chocolate tabby with emerald green eyes, if anything a little over weight, speyed, de flead, wormed regularly, chipped etc.

I'm gearing up to go and have words later because it's just ridiculous now.

I got a collar with DO NOT FEED woven in as I suspect that someone was feeding my fat tabby. He is the greediest boy and I'd get in from work, half the time he'd be starving and half the time he wouldn't be hungry at all, so must have just been fed. He is a very incompetent hunter so its not like he'd just caught himself a mouse sized snack. He always wears a collar, so no way someone could think he was a stray.

We had the problem in reverse. Lady who lived in a first floor apartment near us would go off on hols, ot for the weekend leaving her menagerie to be fed by others. The cat could get out, but not back in, and was frequently out with no access to food or water from about 0700 to 0000 at times. I used to leave water out for him in the summer.

She asked me to feed him and look after him at my house for 3 weeks last year, and he has never left. She didn't come and say she was back and ask for him and it was only when I bumped into her at the shops that I realised she'd returned. She moved away and said I could keep him as she'd now got a kitten who was 'sweeter' than the 8 year old. I'm having him chipped soon and his rabies jabs done so I can bring him back to UK when we move back.

OP, are you me? I'm going through exactly the same thing with my idiot next-door-but-one neighbour. My cat is the third on the street that the woman has stolen from neighbours, and incidentally my cat stopped coming home regularly in spring this year, which is when 'her' last cat passed away.

Cat is chipped, collared, up to date with jabs, has a cat flap accessible all day and night etc, and extremely sociable. Every other neighbour has the brains to chase her out of the house/car/garage when she ventures in, but the foolish woman insists that she 'can't get rid of her'. I suspect if she stopped the feeding and petting the cat would come home pretty sharpish. DH and I have been round independently to request politely that she stops, and we've changed the cat's collar to a big red DO NOT FEED one, but she persists. The horrid woman is also a smoker so it's obvious when the cat has stayed there, but on being confronted she insists that the cat isn't there all the time (in direct conflict with what her husband claimed). It pisses me right off; it's almost impossible to get the cat to the vets for her jabs as she's never home or to de-flea or de-worm her, and the stupid woman feeds her cheap nasty meat so the cat is putting on weight, losing condition, and her teeth are deteriorating.

Said neighbour is also known for starting neighbourhood feuds and our garden adjoins theirs, so I'm worried that things will kick off if I keep going round. Last time she made it sound like I was persecuting them and kept me there for 20 mins while she whined and cried about her last (dead) cat.

Seriously people - please don't feed cats unless they are obviously strays and in very bad condition*. The little blighters are experts at manipulating people and it makes it very hard for their owners to ensure the health of the cats and keep them up to date with jabs. My cat is now away so frequently that I don't see her for days; prior to this year, if she didn't come home in the evening, I would search the neighbourhood in the evening. She has been found locked in garages and cars four times now - but these days I wouldn't necessarily go looking for her for several days, by which time it could be too late.

*Having said that I do understand that there are occasionally exceptional circumstances, some of which have been listed here. But that's clearly not what's going on in OP's situation, nor in mine.