AIBU to want to poke my MIL in the eye with a dummy?

[Bethshine82]

Argh! Sorry, it's another MIL thread.
Yesterday my PIL came over to inflict themselves on us see us. MIL is massively overbearing at the best of times (refers to DS as "my little boy", tells him she loves him more than anyone else does etc gag gag) but she annoyed me more than usual yesterday.
Unfortunately whilst they were here DS was running around and tripped up. He did go with a real thwack tbf and immediately started to cry. She tried to pick him up but happily he only wanted me so she was thwarted, ha ha. I sat DS on sofa with a drink and biscuit (and bloody Dora on TV) to help him get over the "trauma" and to distract him a bit. He'd stopped crying (it was shock as much as anything) and then MIL sat next to him and said "I think he needs his dummy mummy." (Also hate it when she refers to me as mummy but anyway). Thing is DS is coming up to two and a half and we are trying to get rid of dummies. It was my PIL that gave him a dummy in the first place, I never even wanted him to have one. He had been dummy free for nearly a week and had stopped mentioning it after an initial battle. MIL KNEW this. Of course when she mentioned the dummy DS started crying all over again, "Want dummy mum, want dummy."
MIL implied I was being mean to him by saying "Well, I'd give you your dummy my precious boy you've had a terrible terrible shock." FFS he'd only fallen over not lost a limb. So he ended up having the dummy because he howled more about that than he did over originally falling over and she was feeding into it saying "Get his dummy mummy." "He needs a bit of comfort he's had an awful accident" etc etc. And now we are back to square one re dummy. Had battle with him over it again last night and again at nap time today.

AIBU to want to stick a dummy in her mouth so she shuts up? And also to poke her in the eye repeatedly with a dummy? It drives me MAD. This is why people do not like their MILs.

(Sorry I know it is petty but I lay awake and fumed about it last night.)

actually the rent a womb comment made me remember something i'd forgotten blotted out

Before we got pregnant with ds (we were trying but she didn't know) we were at a family party and she started to harrass me in front of everyone about when I would have a baby. Her actual words were "I'd love a little baby again. Have a little baby for me and my son."
I thought it weird at the time. A little baby for her and her son?!

Oh beth

Jesus.

Have a little baby for me and my son crikes .

Beth, you can see how crazy this is now you've written it all down.

You really need to get DH onside before you begin to tackle MIL. Could you write a list of the things she's done , how this has impacted on DS and you, and how you felt about DH's reaction - then tell DH you need to discuss this and ask him to read it? I have a feeling he won't listen if you talk.

This isn't normal MIL behaviour. You're not a surrogate mother producing a baby for the benefit of MIL and DH , but that's how they are treating you.

Butternut234 PMSL at your two-birds-with-one-stone idea!

I would check that she is not keeping dummies at her house like others have said. And possibly always going to PIL with ds so that she can't indulge her fantasies.

Next time she says something about preferring it when you don't visit because your son then wants you rather than her, raise your eyebrows, smile in a slightly confused way and say "gosh, that sounded so rude, did you really mean it in that way?"

And ask your HV for information on how children need (a) proper food and (b) to lose the dummy in order to develop their jaw properly so that they can learn to talk properly.

And if all else fails and you're in a similar situation, make eye contact with her and just snarl "back off" !!

your MIL is nuts, your DH needs to a good talking too.

throw the dummy away and tell MIL that you have done this and not to mention it as it will only set him off crying like it did last time she mentioned it