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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think this is really cheeky?

63 replies

AVoidkaTheKillerZombies · 25/10/2011 18:09

I meet up with the people I met at the NCT when I had DD - we all meet up once a month.

We only have one baby left who hasnt had a birthday. The last time we met up she (the Mum) asked if we could meet up at a soft play place. It transpired that she wanted her DD to feel like she was having a party but she didnt want to pay the 'extortionate' prices for parties.

I was a bit Hmm at that but as we are going to meet up anyway so its not too much of a bother, but she has this afternoon emailled a list of prestents for her DD's 'Party' - so she expects us to pay for our own children to go to soft play and buy a gift, and all the presents on this list are £15+.

AIBU to tell her we will come to the 'party' but I am not getting a gift. We havent doen gifts as a group before so its not like its a tradition.

OP posts:
GypsyMoth · 25/10/2011 18:11

Cheeky mare!! What do the other mums in the group say?

Tchootnika · 25/10/2011 18:11

Of course YANBU - she's already made it clear that she understands what budgeting means! HTH

FetchezLaVampire · 25/10/2011 18:13

Sooo... all the rest of you have had proper parties, but not given presents, but she wants to do the exact opposite?? Yep, cheeky mare!

TheOriginalFAB · 25/10/2011 18:14

I don't think cheeky is the word!!

Original poster
AVoidkaTheKillerZombies · 25/10/2011 18:15

Not all of us have had parties. 2 ladies have had them but the other 4 of us have not (including me - I dont see the point). When we went to the proper parties I got gifts but thats because they were actually having a party.

OP posts:
ImperialBlether · 25/10/2011 18:17

The woman's a lunatic! Wedding lists are bad enough, but lists for her child's first birthday when she's not even having a party?

Bloodymary · 25/10/2011 18:18

Cheeky cow.

So she wants you all to buy her DD a £15 + present, plus for you all to pay entry into the soft play centre (which you would not have to do if it WAS a party), then presumably purchase your own food and drink?

I am quite a generous person, but there is no fucking way that I would be doing that!

happyinherts · 25/10/2011 18:18

So it's the baby's first birthday? Mum wanted her to feel like she was having a party? Am I missing something or are babies really getting more and more intelligent earlier and earlier? One year old feeling like she's missing out?

So it's not a 'real' party. It's a get together of mums and babies who met with a common interest. She wants to cut costs but emails list of presents. My word, how rude. Whatever the age of the child it's rude, but for a first birthday party that isn't a party, words escape me.

Someone needs to tell her a few home truths.

MangoMonster · 25/10/2011 18:18

That's crazy! Cheeky mare!

FlossieFromCrapstonVillas · 25/10/2011 18:20

A list??? Oh my gawd! That's taking the cake, that is.

pigletmania · 25/10/2011 18:21

The party thing is a great idea, they are only babies so will not notice and its not worth spending that much money as they just will not understand. YANBU about the gift, what cheeky woman. Don't get the baby a gift, or if you do limit it to £5 I just hate people's sense of entitilement.

Uglymush · 25/10/2011 18:21

Is this person for real?

Angelico · 25/10/2011 18:25

YANBU. Some people!!!

Original poster
AVoidkaTheKillerZombies · 25/10/2011 18:26

Its the children's third birthdays.

We normally meet at each others houses, we dont normally go to a play place and the one she is chosen is over the other side of the city to most of us.

I hope she is not on MN - I have totally outed myself as a cow :o

OP posts:
LynetteScavo · 25/10/2011 18:26

I think meeting at soft play is an OK idea, but emailing a list of presents?!

I would take a card at most.

Bloodymary · 25/10/2011 18:27

In fact I have never emailed a list of suitable B'day/Xmas gifts for either of my children.
Nor will I, ever!

squeakyfreakytoy · 25/10/2011 18:29

I would "mistake" her gift list as being a list of choices.. and all put a quid in, and just get her the one thing off the list off the lot of you Grin

KatieMortician · 25/10/2011 18:30

I'd email her a "ha ha! Very funny" back. As a reply all.

Feckin' cheek!

TheOriginalFAB · 25/10/2011 18:34

It is one thing to give a few ideas to relatives who ask, this is quite another.

TidyDancer · 25/10/2011 18:34

I always find these types of threads so hard to believe, not because I don't think the OP is telling the truth, but just because I can't comprehend that there are people this brazen in the world!

YANBU. She is a cheeky bitch.

pigletmania · 25/10/2011 18:37

The woman is very rude, I would not buy him a present, just a card, you can pick them up very cheap from Card FActory, and something from the Poundshop. There are lovely things at the Poundshop, character things as well Grin

pigletmania · 25/10/2011 18:39

Tidy I think that there are. There was a wedding thread here a week ago which got huge responses, and one a few months ago from a poster about a 'friend' who did not like the baby things that she got her pregnant friend, that she had a list whereby the cheapest thing on that list was £50. This 'friend' wanted the poster and another friend to get her a £200 breast pump or something, what a cheek Angry

perceptionreality · 25/10/2011 18:45

How rude!! Honestly I cannot believe what some people will try.

breatheslowly · 25/10/2011 18:52

I think that squeaky's idea is great. I would bring a present to a party, but don't expect to pay for the party event myself. This doesn't meet my understanding of a party so wouldn't justify a present. And I wouldn't spend £15 on a party present anyway.

MrsPennySworth · 25/10/2011 18:53

Even if it was a "proper" paid for party, I still wouldn't email a gift list to the childrens parents!

That is beyond cheeky!