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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To wish parents would put their babies in the car rather than leave them in the trolly whilst they unpack the shopping?

121 replies

Rollergirl1 · 25/10/2011 17:33

Have just been to Tesco. I was reversing out of my space when I saw in my rear-view mirror that the car immediately to the right of the car I was heading towards had a young child still sat in the trolly. Not only was she still in the trolly but they had the bit that she was in facing out into the road rather than closest to their parked car. I have parking sensors in my car so there was no chance of me hitting the trolly or the child. But I was inching closer and closer. I couldn't wait as I was holding up traffic from both sides. I just kept thinking why don't they get her out and put her in the car but instead they just scowled at me!

Honestly, some parents have no brains!

OP posts:

NoOnesGoingToEatYourEyes · 25/10/2011 20:53

Thank you, I appreciate it.

I think the shorter version of what I was getting at was that the chances of your child being injured in a car park while sitting in your car or in your trolley are both quite small, but you do the thing you feel safest with and don't deserve to be judged for it.

jugglingwithpumpkins · 25/10/2011 20:58

No one could argue with that.
So sorry for your loss

UnDeadDolly · 25/10/2011 21:01

So sorry noone

OP, YABU. You should have gone to Waitrose [hgrin]

Original poster

Rollergirl1 · 25/10/2011 21:11

No One: Really sorry to hear that.

And I shall take on board that it is a matter of personal opinion rather than "my way being the right way".

OP posts:

SixStringWidow · 25/10/2011 21:14

Shit!

You've just reminded me that I've just left dd in the trolly in Asda car park! along with my brains

Do you think she'll be able to make her own way home, I can't quite remember how get to Asda...

petaluma · 25/10/2011 21:23

Oh just go and do us all a favour and shop online next time. At least you would be in the realms of reason to be annoyed by that.

Morloth · 25/10/2011 22:45

Nope it was 30 degrees the last time I went shopping, which means it was probably about 60 in the car.

Not a chance.

RaspberryLemonPavlova · 25/10/2011 23:08

Must admit I did once carefully load my baby DD into the car and drove off. Leaving my shopping and bag behind in the carpark!

However when relating this story at Post-natal exercise class, the other Mum had done exactly the opposite!! And this was in the days when you put your own baby car seat in trolley, she had put the car seat on the ground by the car and driven off.

Was so scared I would do this that I always loaded my kids in first.

my2centsis · 26/10/2011 01:58

only read the 1st 10posts but i think YABU judgmental and silly.
depends on what kind of day it is to if i will leave dd in the trolley or not,
when i leave her in the trolley she is not in harms way, she is sitting safely, i am standing right next to her, talking to her.
Would you rather i stick her in the car where she can undo her seat belt and play with the hand break, buttons etc, then get her back out to walk all the way to put the trolley back then put her back in the car? ridiculous, weather the child is in the trolley or in the car the trolley would still be in your way precious!
I really don't understand people like you who have to judge other parents on silly little things like that.

SlinkingOutsideInSocks · 26/10/2011 02:07

Bloody hell, I had to open the thread to find out what the gripe was. Some people find fault in anything.

When I unload my trolley, I am right by the trolley. I find it's easiest to be right by the trolley, as you have less distance to cover when manoeuvring shopping bags from said trolley to car.

As such, I am usually 100% cognisant of what is going on with, and around the trolley, and of the trolley's inhabitants.

So, if a car is bearing down on the lot of us, I am usually able to man-handle it out of the way. And give the driver a filthy look for driving into us instead of along the marked pathways of the carpark, especially designated for cars. [hconfused]

SlinkingOutsideInSocks · 26/10/2011 02:12

I have to say, though, that a car never actually has born down on us, en masse, whilst the trolley is being unloaded.

Mostly, I suspect, because the quickest way to leave the carpark is to go via a designated exit, and not through a trolley with children in it and the car it is next to.

OP - maybe you're just a crap driver?

wonkylegs · 26/10/2011 02:48

If you have a chance of hitting a trolley with a child in it surely you also have a chance of hitting the person unloading it or pinning them up against the car with said trolley - so is it ok to potentially hit an adult but not a child?
As the driver of the reversing car it is up to you to ensure that it is as safe as possible before you start your manoeuvre and continues to be so until you complete it.

Oblomov · 26/10/2011 09:44

I leave children in the trolley all the time. I leave children int he car all the time too.
Sorry, what is the point of this discussion, again?

GypsyMoth · 26/10/2011 09:47

The point of the discussion was WE are all brainless parents, and OP was posting to remind US how superior she is!

StaceymAloneForver · 26/10/2011 09:56

i shove my kids in the car b4 i unload, mainly so i don't have to listen to them argueing, and strap them in so they cant breathe move.

dont give a flying fig what others do tbh, if the trolley was in the way anyway it doenst matter wether the child was in it or not

WelshMoth · 26/10/2011 10:07

I think that puts an end to this debate. Well said nooone. Sorry for your loss, there are no words

WelshMoth · 26/10/2011 10:08

I think that puts an end to this debate

Blimey, comes across as a bit controlling - sorry - not meant as that at all, just meant that nooone sums it up very well.

allnewtaketwo · 26/10/2011 10:12

As others have said - if you were concerned about reversing into the trolley with the child in it, does this mean you're not concerned about crashing into the trolley as long as it's empty . Shouldn't you just be driving more carefully in a busy carpark? Because not all children are in trollies, lots are circling around their poor parents' legs when their busily trying to get sorted. Suggest you use your mirrors more if you're worried

Debs75 · 26/10/2011 10:44

A handbrake should be pulled on hard enough so that a child cannot release it.

I wish, my handbrake is foot operated but to take it off it is a stupid lever in the middle beside the wheel. The car is also very roomy so an adult can easily climb through from the middle to the front seat. DS took the handbrake off and squashed my driver door and dd2 managed to take it off last week, it rolled, the door knocked dd3's car seat over and I ended up sprawled across the pedals desperately trying to press the brake down hard enough to stop 2 tonne of car. I can't leave dd2 in the car alone now in case she does this again and actually hurts someone.

Noone that must of been horrible for you. I drive a lot and I know I am pretty safe but I also know there are some idiots around who can end someone's life so quickly for the sake of a few more seconds speed.

idlevice · 26/10/2011 11:02

If the child is left in the car while the guardian returns the trolley, what about the risk of something happening to the guardian, like getting hit by a car? If they were hurt seriously then no-one would know a child had been left alone in their vehicle, which is a horrendous scenario.

If there are two people with the child/children, as in your situation, then I agree it would be preferable for one to organise the shopping/trolley & one organise the children but there's not much in it cos if there is only one then the preferred situation IMO is to leave the child under direct supervision of the adult. I do this, in Australia, as it's often too unbearably hot to stay in a stationary car without air-con on which needs the ignition on.

differentnameforthis · 26/10/2011 11:29

If I am in a car park, of a supermarket or similar, I expect there to be trolleys, buggys, children etc around, so I always proceed with caution. The onus isn't on the parent to put the child in the car before unpacking, it is on drivers to watch where they are going! It isn't as if the kids are just running around, is it?

As an aside, I don't understand parking sensors either. Have we stopped relying on our senses when driving?

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