Social Services are not the Childcatcher (FFS)

[LoopyLoopsPussInBoots]

(Thread about so many threads)

AIBU to think that if you have concerns for the welfare of a child, you don't assess the situation yourself, you let the professionals know so they can evaluate the situation?

I know contact from SS can be daunting and worrying for a parent, but the fear of upsetting an adult, or the fear of repercussions on yourself can NEVER trump the fear of welfare for a child.

Social Services will not just wade in and take children away without very compelling reasons to do so. Please don't be scared of calling them if you think a child is at risk of abuse, whatever form this may take. Don't 'wait and see', don't try to sort it out yourself, don't ask a million people for advice and do nothing, ask the trained and experienced professionals to do their job and assess the situation properly.

FFS!

Interesting R4 Woman's Hour discussion about 'reclaiming social work' right at this moment, btw.

HuntyCat - I'm not surprised it was finally a teacher who got you out of an appalling situation. I'm sure that behind every tragic child death you read about, there is a raft of proffessional - nursery workers, teachers etc who having been screaming to SS for ages about their concerns, only to be brushed off and ignored. A couple of years ago, a 4 year old told a colleague that his father had thrown him across a room - they was physical evidence to suggest this. When SS were contacted (not the first time for this family), they said they weren't prepared to get involved until my colleague had spoken to the father about the allegations after school. WTF!!!!??????

Lara2 Case studies would actually prove you wrong here. Professionals working with children can be just as prone to making mistakes. Two examples where the responses of teachers were flawed are the cases of Lauren Wright and Kyra Ishaq.

I state that not to demonise teachers, but to counter your rather spurious statement.

One of my oldest friends works in Child Protection. About 4 years ago her DS, then aged about 11, started to display some serious behavioural issues, including threatening to self-harm at school (the police were called) and at home, whenever he was asked to do something he didn't wish to do. Extreme defiance when confronted by authority. He discovered that he could get a very swift response to his demands, and his parents were too frightened to argue with him. He used to run out in the street and scream that his parents were trying to rape him. He was occasionally violent towards his mother, and told his teacher that she had assaulted him, when in fact she was blocking a punch to her face. As a result of these incidents SS were called in on 2 occasions. As they were undergoing family therapy at a very famous centre at the time, no further action was taken.The DS had to be bribed into acceptable behaviour - he was effectively a law unto himself from the age of 12, and he simply refused to co-operate at the therapy sessions, and finally just ran away whenever he was supposed to attend. He ruled the household like a little dictator.

But my friend was too frightened to exert any discipline over her DS in the home, and was too frightened to tell the psychiatrist about what was really going on, because she was absolutely convinced that a) her child would be removed by SS, and b) she would lose her job as a result. So even some social workers are terrified their own children could be taken away as a result of false reports.

My friend was utterly convinced her son's problems were 100% due poor parenting on her part, because this, TBH, appears to be the prism through which Child Protection view all families. Everyone else who came into contact with them could see that her DS has some major undiagnosed personality and/or developmental issues. There are MN posters with DC with SN who have requested assistance from SS, only to find themselves being investigated for CP issues.

Lara2 - and in my experience some teachers/health professionals do NOT tell SW about issues that they are aware of, we can be called in long after there has been an incident that would concern SW. Talking about 'interagency working' is all well and good, its not so evident in actual practice. There's always seems to be that 4.59pm Friday telephone call from a 'concerned professional' who has sat on some knowledge for weeks, in some case months, before having an attack of conscience just before they clock-off for the weekend.

Most recently a H/V (whom I have a very good working relationship with) went with a student nurse to the home of a family who's children are on the CP Register...knocked door, could hear kids in the house, no answer...so they both walked away. I would be SACKED if I did that.

It is a disgrace that there are no formalised standards of practice/intervention/strategies across L.A's...would make my job far easier. SW is often seen as a mysterious and dark art, practiced by power mad harpies ( I don't know what the male equivalent is, sorry) who only want to remove children from loving parents . and for the record...Social Worker's do NOT have the right to remove a child, only a court (and Police in some circumstances under 'emergency powers) can do that.

Some people do, both intentionally or by being so consumed by their own unmet needs, hurt and damage children, physically, emotionally, sexually. The child's welfare is paramount, but try telling that to the lawyer/court when the parent(s) is screeching about their 'human rights' and 'that cunting nasty Social Worker'.

Want to work unpaid overtime constantly, give your physical and mental health a 'doing', worry about the children and families you work with in the sleepless early hours, take away your focus from your own children/family even in your time off, have to apologise for the mistakes of Management (who are trying to save money at every turn because higher up the food chain there are BUDGETS to consider dont'cha know), still be paying off the student loan until you die?...then my dears, a Social Worker's life is for you...

but... when, that golden moment where you DO make a difference to the life of a child or family...it is, to coin a phrase 'priceless'...and why I love my job.

if only they were as thorough as the child catcher

Moomin The Child Catcher took ALL children, are you then advocating that SW remove every child where there is 'concern', whether ultimately right or wrong?

This thread has highlighted the good, and the downright terrifying, sides of what it is to be an adult/child/parent/worker in a terribly flawed system, that has dedicated, and waste of space, SW's (human beings one and all I assure you!).

The myths that are propogated about what is 'good' parenting, and what is 'bad' are all over this site, and far removed from what your average SW has to deal with in a day. In my working life, I hope I have the sense to judge (and that's what we are paid to do) what is 'acceptable' and what is not...Frootie-shootie's/T.V on all day/Pom Bears are not in my professional lexicon, I do know when a child is being harmed tho', and assess accordingly.

Can you imagine a damaged adult, sexually and emotionally abused, who has children...where do they get their parenting model from? Do you let them 'try' to make amends (yes)...or do you see into the future and see their damaged children bringing up their children (and their children) on that damaged and damaging 'imprint'?

It's a fucking minefield, seems that those that can do, and those that can't...well, they judge (and read the DM) .

@ Moomin...above rant was NOT at you solely...I am an 'angry at the system' SW

Lapsed's posts reminds me of a SW who suffered domestic violence. Child protection were called when she reported her dh. Big mistake. Because child protection then attacked her, demanding SHE do x, y or z because SHE was putting the child at risk. She took the beatings in silence from then on.

(Yes, of course SS have a role to protect children who are at risk from DV, but NOT by making things a million times worse for the primary victim, FFS.)