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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To not pick up my son from school this Friday unless he has his school coat with him?

19 replies

Ladymuck · 17/10/2011 13:29

DS (10) has left his school coat at school. In general I'm not bothered, but I would like to know that it is at least safely there, either on his peg or in his locker. He has indicated that he isn't sure where it is. Coat is clearly named.

He has a busy week, and the only days where he will be picked up from his school are Wednesday and Friday. AIBU to say that I will not take him home without his coat on Friday?

OP posts:

squeakytoy · 17/10/2011 13:32

Eh?

What are you going to do then, drive off and leave him at school for the weekend?

mrskeithlemon · 17/10/2011 13:32

I can sympathise with you here Ladymuck. Ds often comes out without his things.

I have started to keep him in on a friday after school if he comes home without his things (ie not playing in the street)

Ormirian · 17/10/2011 13:32

Well what will you do then?

Leave him there?

rubyrubyruby · 17/10/2011 13:33

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

tooearlymustdache · 17/10/2011 13:34

you're not bothered but want to leave him there?

much

MrSpoc · 17/10/2011 13:35

i think the child walks home the rest of the week.

Can you clarify please op.

Booooooyhoo · 17/10/2011 13:36

YANBU, leave the cleaning staff to deal with him. why on earth should you have do deal with the child?

duvetdayplease · 17/10/2011 13:37

You need an actual punishment. Why not take some cash from his savings or take away a reasonable sum of pocket money to buy a replacement?

I think this would be an ideal opportunity to learn about the cost of things.

HecateGoddessOfTheNight · 17/10/2011 13:38

on friday, if he comes out without it, send him back into school to search for it.

That's what I do

squeakytoy · 17/10/2011 13:40

Why can he not look for it today, and come home in it today?

Original poster

Ladymuck · 17/10/2011 13:58

Sorry, didn't mean to be stealth-like. Tonight he has choir practise and is picked up from the nearby senior school. If he hasn't remembered to bring it with him when he leaves the junior school, then it will be too late. Tomorrow he would usually be picked up from the swimming pool (again not at his junior school), If he doesn't remember to bring it with him when he leaves the junior school, then it will be too late. On Wednesday there is a football match so he will be picked up from the host school. If he doesn't remember to bring it with him when he leaves the junior school on the minibus, then it will be too late. Thursday is an unusual day this week as he will be singing up in London, and I'll pick him up after his performance there. If he doesn't remember to bring it with him when he leaves the junior school to get on the coach, then it will be too late. So the only day when I am picking him from his actual junior school will be Friday.

I guess that I could just threaten to have him pay for a new coat (he is saving for a game so this would be dire indeed). However I suspect that his coat is actually in the school somewhere, so this would mean that we have 2 identical school coats and he is in Year 6, so I won't get a lot of use from them.

Parents are not allowed inside the school. So I can't help him look for it.

OP posts:

annh · 17/10/2011 14:05

I think he needs to be looking for it NOW, not on Friday. In my experience, the longer stuff is missing at school, the less chance of it being returned. Also, if someone has taken it home, it will give that person a change to bring it back before the weekend. It's also getting cold over the coming days so he is going to need to wear it. Maybe that will help him to remember it!

minimisschief · 17/10/2011 14:25

i do not understand. you pick him up he hasn't got a coat why do you not tell him to go back and get it.

why would you need to leave him there?

Bramshott · 17/10/2011 14:28

I'm with Hecate and minimiss - if he comes out without it on Friday, send him back in to get it. That's what I do with DD1 who comes home on the bus most days but is collected on a Fri.

AKMD · 17/10/2011 14:28

YANBU. I worked as an au pair on my gap year and part of my 'duties' was going back to the children's school to get the 9yo's coat from his coat peg/under the tree/on the bench/at his friend's house/can't remember. It drove me potty!

GrimmaTheNome · 17/10/2011 14:38

If he comes out of school without the coat, send him back in till he's found it. But as someone else said, tell him to find it now and make sure he knows where it is.

Its worse when they're at secondary and you never pick them up - I'm sure that - having worn it in one morning when it was raining - I'm not going to see DDs coat again till it snows!

chill1243 · 17/10/2011 15:01

Have a word with a form teacher. It can be a common problem;but need not become an issue.

HecateGoddessOfTheNight · 17/10/2011 16:02

Parents aren't allowed inside the school? That's odd. Why is that?

And what would they do if you went to the door and said "My son has forgotten his coat and we need it now please." would they go and find it?

MoreBeta · 17/10/2011 16:09

I suspect he has not forgotten it but has left it on purpose.

DS1 age 11 just started secondary school and was already developing the trait of not wanting to wear his coat in Yr6.

He even walks through the pouring rain with it in his rucksack so he does not have to be seen wearing it by his mates. Its not cool to wear a coat. He left it at home today and its freezing. Its a plain black coat FGS! I expect if it had Superdry or Jack Wills printed on in big yellow swirly letters he would wear it in the middle of summer.

AAAaaarggggghhhh!

The thing is he wears multiple layers of thermal stuff while playing sport so its not like he is hot blooded. He feels cold.

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