putting my size 6 right in my huge gob

[leelo]

i went to my churchs local car boot today. met a dad of a someone my dd used to know. i said congratulations on your new ds i met your wife last week and he's lovely. he then said thank u he's not mine. the boot had been cheating on me. i was floored. i'd obviously put my foot right in it. i said i'm really sorry i didn't know his ex hadn't mentioned anything when i'd bumped into her. but what made it funny is when he said don't worry i didn't know either. am i being unreasonable for being polite and making small talk and putting my foot in it or do u all have moments like this?[hblush]

Oops! That made me laugh - sounds like the guy took it well though [hsmile]

no can't say i have ever had a moment like that [hshock]

however, YANBU because you didn't do it deliberately! and it sounds like he took it quite well anyway really!

You did well to continue the small talk - I'd have probably got all flustered, gone into 100mph talk and said something worse.

He sounds like a nice guy though, he could have been all bitter sounding and made you feel worse.

And yes I'm sorry to say it made me laugh too

am i being unreasonable for being polite and making small talk and putting my foot in it

It's not like you did it on purpose so how could you be being unreasonable?

What does he mean by "I don't know either", I wonder?

the guy obviously wasn't aware of the cheating and said the split had only just happened. but i keep finding myself in situations like this. i'll bump into an old school friend and ask oh how is your brother does he still play drums no he got killed in a motorbike accident. or last week i asked my neighbour how her husband was and she broke down in tears on me and my ds who is 3 about how he's just been given news that his cancer is terminal. i am seriously scared to ask people questions anymore as i can't judge if they are gonna drop an emotional bomb on me.

the real issue is i may now bump into the woman again of the cheating issue as we have kids same age and will go to same places. if i see her i'm gonna be quiet and just nod.

Those sorts of situations it's best to be frank - don't apologise for bringing it up - perfect opportunity to offer listen and offer sympathy which might be what they need. Don't be tempted to hurriedly change subject as then you make them feel subject is taboo; not his fault his dw was a faithless woman!

Someone asked me how my dad was after he had just died and I felt so bad for them, knowing they would feel awful, that I almost wanted to lie and say fine..... Instead though, I went bright red and giggled. Which really didn't help matters and was completely inappropriate!

YANBU at all though, and it def sounded like he took it well :)