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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to not want a workman to poo in my toilet?

652 replies

CreamolaFoamless · 14/10/2011 14:00

Earlier today I was having my boiler serviced and two men came to do it.

The older man said 'can I use your toilet' , I said 'yes of course' and directed him to the bathroom. Thinking he just needed to pass water

But he had a poo in it! He was in there a good 10 minutes and has colleague was looking embarressed as we chatted.

It stank ! Really stank ...why do people think it's ok to poo in someone elses house

Would it be unreasonable to refuse workmen toilet access in future [hshock]

I'm using the term workmen because I don't know what else to call them

OP posts:
MrBloomsNursery · 15/10/2011 22:57

Surely an alkaline based toilet cleaner would solve the problem of skid marks? It would slide the shit along, instead of letting it stick to the bowl surface?

helpmabob · 15/10/2011 23:00

You know I do actually agree that people should clean up after themselves but as you just can not refuse access to a toilet,, you can only hope they will and if they don't suck it up, hold your nose and get the toilet brush out.

ja9 · 16/10/2011 00:06

Op... Have you read The Help?! Out in cinemas later this month...

marriedinwhite · 16/10/2011 07:31

YABU. And really not meant as a stealth boast but we have five bogs inside this house and an outdoor one (old house). When we bought it my mother announced as only my mother can "oh the outside one will be wonderful when you have workmen here". In 18 years I can honestly say that I have never had the audacity to turn round and say to a workman "if you need the loo, do remember to use the cold one out in the garden". DH uses it though when he's gardening because it means he doesn't have to take his shoes off before coming back into the house Grin. And then he shouts from the garden because there's never any paper in there or what has been in there has got damp and gone a mit mouldy!

What do you think a loo is for OP if it isn't for relief?

exoticfruits · 16/10/2011 07:39

I mentioned 'The Help' earlier ja9 but it was totally misunderstood and I was accused of making it a race issue! Confused
I knew that it would rumble on and we hadn't heard the last!
Has OP ever come back?

FearfulYank · 16/10/2011 07:40

What I think is interesting is that most African Americans don't like The Help.

FearfulYank · 16/10/2011 07:41

And giggling at the thought of the OP looking suspiciously at anyone who wants to use her loo ... "Which do you have to do?"

:o

GalloweesG · 16/10/2011 07:41

It is possible to walk into a toilet, have a poo and come out without anyone knowing what has occurred in there. Unfortunately men some people think it's acceptable to take ages and leave skids and smells evidence.

Until you can leave a lavatory as you found it you should be confined to your own.

exoticfruits · 16/10/2011 07:54

Whether they like it or not the fact is that from the book you get the idea that most people think that it is unacceptable to have separate toilets for family and workers (regardless of colour of skin)and that a builder ought to be shown into the house toilet.
Here we are 50 yrs on and there are people who would rather workers went at home before they set out to work (regardless of the fact that builders generally start early) and cross their legs all day!

FearfulYank · 16/10/2011 08:39

I know.

Just interesting. :)

Andrewofgg · 16/10/2011 08:43

GalloweesG until s/he's been you don't know what sort of crapper you have got in the house, and you have to say Yes and hope for the best. The user should clear up any skids and use anything provided for the smells; for the rest they have to disperse over time. I suspect that everyone's crap smells different and we are used to our own and that of close family but notice anybody else's.

pigletmania · 16/10/2011 09:26

Reading this thread, some of you really need psychological help for your issues its just not right. Turning something normal and natural into a big issue, to the point of denying someone the use of a toilet, is disgusting and not healthy. Nobody likes it when their lovely clean loo gets dirty, I am like the next person, but its there to deficate in by anybody who visits my home, be it friends, family or workers. I don't know how any sane person could deny someone of a human right, and compromise their dignity, for the sake of their loo getting dirty Hmm. Madness utter madness.

wellwisher · 16/10/2011 10:08

If only this thread had been here before that "comedienne" (sic) finalised her stand-up routine about AIBU...

Original poster
CreamolaFoamless · 16/10/2011 17:35

As the OP I appreciate your replies . I'm waivering between thinking my thoughts were unreasonable and thinking no I was right to feel upset.

Just because a toilet is there for pooing in doesn't mean strangers should be able to poo in it!

If the guy was hungry and took food out my cupboard and started cooking himself breakfast because he was hungry that wouldn't be on , even though some people are saying that is what toilets are for.

Cookers are for cooking and food is for eating but I'm sure a few of you would be upset if someone you didn't know used your cooker or washing machine for it's intended purpose!

Anyway have bought industrial strength bleach, toilet duck and blue cistern things, my toilet feels as if it has been abused [hgrin]

OP posts:
Insomnia11 · 16/10/2011 17:43

If you've gotta go, you've gotta go, I certainly can't hold in a poo for long. But I would also leave the toilet in the manner I would expect to find it, make sure it had flushed properly, give it a clean with the loo brush and open a window or spray air freshener if there was any.

KurriKurri · 16/10/2011 17:44

That's not a valid comparison, - if someone asked me for something to eat because they were hungry, yes I would give them something, not a big deal.

Your workman asked to use your toilet, he didn't just shove past you and do a dump in your loo. If you were so particular you should have specified 'only wees allowed', otherwise people will assume they can use your toilet for whatever happens to come out.

Surely the smell has gone by now, or are you still suffering from the memory of it?

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 16/10/2011 17:46

That comparison doesn't stand up at all, Creamola, because it is very easy for someone working a long day in other people's homes to make alternative arrangements for their lunch (packed lunch/Greggs/McDonalds etc), whereas it is not easy to make alternative arrangements for needing a poo, when working in someone else's house.

One question - do you think it is a good idea for someone to work on a safety-critical job (ie maintaining a gas boiler) whilst being distracted by being desperate for a poo? I'd rather deal with the smell and the 'violation' of my loo, and have his full attention on the job in hand, not the jobby he's struggling to hold in!

Original poster
CreamolaFoamless · 16/10/2011 17:55

I actually think if you refused a workman in your house access to a toilet he could take you to court. And if he couldn't he should

seriously helpmabob? ..I have never heard of that

He was here 20 mins though not an entire day , 10 mins of which were spent on my loo. he finished the job before asking to use the loo and as I said if it was to pass water it would have been fine, but to have a 10 min poo seemed unreasonable to me.

I will also say categorically to posters

a)It had nothing do with his job

b)to those with family members with intestional disorders this was not refusing an ill man toilet access (I have a family member with Ulcerivitus Coiletis so know how some people suffer )

this was just a bog standard situation where a man just thought it wass ok to shit in my toilet when it was not necessary (there are around 5 toilet places 2 mins from my door so I'm sure he could have waited 2 mins until he was in a more private place for his own comfort as well as mine)

OP posts:
pigletmania · 16/10/2011 18:00

You can't make that kind of comparison op because its totally different. The poor guy was in there for about 10 mins, he probably could not wait to go somewhere else and had to go NOW! Your loo has been abused, gosh give me a break, that's what its there for! When your hungry you can wait until you find a cafe to eat, unless your diabetic but then you bring a snack or something, when you get the urge to poo sometimes you have to go there and then or there will be some mess. What would you prefer op. He might have had a bowel condition that you don't know about, he's not going to go round telling everyone about it is he Hmm

pigletmania · 16/10/2011 18:04

How do you know that he did not have an illness, you are making assumptions. My mum gets IBS and sometimes she has to go, she does not leave the house much because of it.

Original poster
CreamolaFoamless · 16/10/2011 18:04

he didn't have a bowel condition!

It wasn't be he was a 'workman' as some people seem to insutiating

I was annoyed because I found it a bit cheeky and rude ,

OP posts:
pigletmania · 16/10/2011 18:05

how do you know, did you ask him!

Original poster
CreamolaFoamless · 16/10/2011 18:06

no piglet I'm not making assumptions if you see my post on Friday this came up in conversation (I'll not go into why) but it did

OP posts:
Original poster
CreamolaFoamless · 16/10/2011 18:10

piglet I'll pm you if you really want to know but he had to do with medication being on the kitchen work top which sparked a conversation as niece has the same condition . Not really something I wanted to go into on the forum as it involves a family member

OP posts:
pigletmania · 16/10/2011 18:16

My ddad had UC and died of bowel cancer Sad in the end. That aside sometimes when you have to poo you have to poo. Sometimes I've been able to hold it, other times thank goodness I've been at home or near a toilet. Poor guys bowels might be having a bad day.

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